Your view is the logical one. Baby is hungry, can't or don't want to breastfeed so get formula, fed baby is now happy. Voila, simple, easy, happy baby should equate to a happy mum. This is the logical thought process.
Most new mums don't think with logic though. They're exhausted, hungry, hormonal and fragile. They need help and support for all issues they may face.
It's not just a case of being given permission, it's letting go of the idea that all these medical professionals are pushing and pushing and pushing breastfeeding so it must be the right option, the breast is best message is everywhere, the "give your baby the best start in life" flyers are everywhere, so when you can't breastfeed, suddenly you look at these flyers and the message and being hounded by the health professionals and in your exhausted, fragile and hormonal state suddenly because you can't breastfeed, your baby is starving and screaming and you can't fix it, there's no real help other than "keep going", there's no health professional telling you that formula is okay, too. So in your mind, you become a sub-par parent, one who doesn't put their babies first, doesn't want the best for them, doesn't care about them having the best start. And no midwife tells them otherwise. They're still encouraged to breastfeed, even if, just to feed the baby (when the midwives informed them their baby was starving), they go to formula. Then there's the feeling of rejection by your own baby, the midwives telling you they'll root around for the breast and latch themselves, so when they don't and they even start screaming just seeling your breast, the feeling of rejection is horrendous.
There's a lot more than being given permission.
This is a hormonal, hungry and exhausted new mums logic.
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