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  1. #1
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    Default Partner's Involvement (with difficulties)

    What kind of involvement in parenting does your Partner/Husband take?

    Do most of them know how to change a diaper by 3 months?
    Do they take care of them and spend one on one time on daily basis?

    What are to be expected out of them that is healthy and balance?
    Like if you're a stay at home mom, or that you both are working.

    And what if your partner have movement restrictions? Like if he can't move about freely, what are the things they can do to improve bonding?

    My DH have arthritis, and although he goes to work, he comes back limping very badly every single day and takes a lot of effort just to go to the toilet and stuff. Otherwise he just sits on the sofa all day long to rest his feet, no walks with LO, no diaper change, no bath bonding time. The only thing he can do is hold her and entertain her with toys while I do house chores or cook. He can't sit well on floor too due to his arthritis. He mostly sit semi laying down with cushion support to lift his feet off the sofa.



    I somehow feel more bonding is needed. My DD is almost 6 months now. I am not sure how. =(

    Now all DD does is cry when he holds her.

  2. #2
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    How is he feeling about his ability to bond with her? Is he wanting to cuddle/sing/read with her? If he is wanting more interaction is taking her swimming an option?
    If movement is painful I would be happy with seeing a desire to interact and wouldn't expect him to take on physical tasks that exacerbate the symptoms.

    edit: I just wanted to add that if you are feeling under pressure due to your work load it may be worth looking into a cleaner/ au pair /asking for help to take some pressure off. Counselling may also help in terms of working through any issues/stress that comes with having a partner with physical limitations.
    Last edited by Eolas; 06-01-2014 at 16:37.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eolas View Post
    How is he feeling about his ability to bond with her?
    Is he wanting to cuddle/sing/read with her? If he is wanting more interaction is taking her swimming an option?
    If movement is painful I would be happy with seeing a desire to interact and wouldn't expect him to take on physical tasks that exacerbate the symptoms.

    edit: I just wanted to add that if you are feeling under pressure due to your work load it may be worth looking into a cleaner/ au pair /asking for help to take some pressure off. Counselling may also help in terms of working through any issues/stress that comes with having a partner with physical limitations.

    He feels helpless whenever DD cries whenever he holds her. DD always turn to me and look as if I abandoned her to him and doesn't see him as someone she could feel comfortable with.

    DH is more of confused and he is becoming a bit reluctant to hold her because she kept crying once she is with him.

    I tried to let her bond with him more during the holidays, by being there while they are together, it is better this way, but when I am not near her, she still cries awful lot. I like it that she likes me that much I am sure this is a passing phase, but I do need to do stuff around the house as my DH can't do them.

    Even with him entertaining her with toys, it doesn't seems to work now. She just cries all the way whenever I am not in her sight.

    I do struggle with work load, but it is still sort of manageable thus far, thanks for your concern.

    I am more worried about the importance of her bonding with daddy and feeling comfortable around him enough to not cry.


 

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