Quick history my now ex partner has an issue with addiction. U name it he does it. I left when my ds1 was 4 month old after coming home from my uncles 50th to find him so stoned he couldn't string a sentence together. I had also found out that week he had gambled over $10K and we were going to need to sell the house. Than gambling I was willing to help with and try to support him to get through but the drugs not to the point of being so stoned when our 4month old was in his care.
Anyway I left he claimed he was getting help we started spending time together and well stupidly i fell pregnant with ds2.
He begged me to give him another go saying he would get help and really give it everything to make it work.
Things were going great for 18months well so I thought.
He stopped his business 4 moths ago due to 'chronic' pain yet was cleared by the dr of any medical condition and won't seek further help. I understand pain and wasn't going to force him of he said he couldn't.
I can't work as we decided on another baby and I am now 28weeks. No employer will take me on now. That I get. We had a little in savings and the dr gave him 3 months medical leave. In this time he didn't look for a job at all.
It's now over 4 months and during this time I found out he gambled $3.5k which we did not have to spare, he started smoking pot again and cigarettes (this is more about not being able to pay bills let along afford these) and drinking every day. So his day would consist of waking around 8-9 playing with the kids for a bit, working on his boat or prepping to go fishing, he would play video games, get stoned and drinking and stay up until 1-2am.
I felt like I had a 16yo.
So yesterday after 4 months of this and me slowly losing patience and understanding I woke up to find one of our dogs missing. After getting stoned in the garage NYE he had left everything open! Everything. I went into the bedroom where he was of course still sleeping and told him this. His response was oh well and told me to F off.
After this I was so angry and explained to him it was the fact that we have a 2yo and 1yo and everything was open they could have woken and gotten out. We have a creek at the end of the street. He ignore me, still make no attempt to move. It was at this point I got so angry and lost it. I picked up a brush and hit him with it. I know I shouldn't have but I was so angry. anyway he just laughed at me said that's assault and calls the police. I left with the boys at this stage. I was so upset that he drove me to that point. The police came and saw me at mums. He wanted a dvo against me but the police didn't give him one. They know I wouldn't normally do it and most certainly won't do it again. I was so upset that i had done it
It was this though that made me realise its over for good I am never ever going back.
He has left the house now so I can stay here with the kids. Problem is money.
Due to his problems etc I have a credit card at $3k (in my name due to his gambling problems) we are $400 fn short on bills alone! Savings only goes so far.
I get $1000 a fn from centrelink currently for the parenting payment but that will have to change.
What I was wondering is firstly does anyone have any idea what a single parent with 2 children gets? Or even 3 as I will have another in march. I will only get $2k baby bonus as I haven't worked having 3 kids so close.
Also has anyone every applied for their subsidised housing. I currently have to pay $400pw week which is cheap for brisbane by still a lot I get $100 rent assistance now as part of that $1000 but $50 a week isn't much.
How long can it take to get this kind of thing and what are the criteria?
I can return to work once bub is born but until then I have no idea what I am going to do. Having 3 under 3 will be hard and cost a fortune in day care. I can work nights but that will be exhausting.
He will want 50/50 time even though he never spent 1/4 of this time with them when we were together but I won't fight him on this. How does this affect payments. I will have bub 100% at first due to bfing so again even though he will have the older ones 50% I still can't return to work.
He probably won't take them 50/50 but he won't work so he won't have to pay child support.
And finally has anyone applied for their some of their super on these grounds?
I feel so lost and so angry i let myself get into this crappy position but it is what it is I need to deal with it and try to move on. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Sorry for the long post