+ Reply to Thread
Page 3 of 7 FirstFirst 12345 ... LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 61
  1. #21
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Posts
    19
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    6
    Reviews
    0
    Thanks Kara.

    The 2nd guy is great. He knows the whole situation with the guy I'm seeing.

    He is happy to do the paternity test, help with the cost and support me either way I choose to go, regardless of the outcome.

    The guy I'm seeing, I have no idea yet. He knows, but we haven't spoken about it and I'll just wait until he is ready.

    I really have no idea what I am going to do.

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    12,708
    Thanks
    9,558
    Thanked
    12,689
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week
    I'm confused. Why don't you want the other guy to know about the paternity confusion?. Either you are in an open relationship as originally stated, or you're not (in which case you cheated and that's a difficult situation to find yourself in).

    Either way be careful: my good friend had a secret termination and she still cries over it many years later. If you terminate under a cloud of dishonesty because you are trying to avoid the truth coming out, it may haunt you forever too.

  3. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to VicPark For This Useful Post:

    KaraB  (30-12-2013),lovebeingamum!  (30-12-2013),mrsd  (01-01-2014),MsViking  (30-12-2013),~BEXTER~  (25-01-2014)

  4. #23
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Launceston
    Posts
    13,466
    Thanks
    732
    Thanked
    2,355
    Reviews
    35
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    You want to terminate if it's the nice guys who is being nothing but supportive but keep it if it's the guys who isn't happy about the pregnancy and your not even in a relationship with and are happy to lie to about the ehe situation....
    Sorry but I think you need to grow up and tell the truth. This baby didn't have any say in who it's father is.

    Make this decision based on the BABY! Do you want the baby? Not do you want x to be the father. Gosh!

    If your going to terminate at least do it for the right reasons!

    Good luck.

  5. The Following 17 Users Say Thank You to waterlily For This Useful Post:

    Amiedoll  (30-12-2013),CassJ  (30-12-2013),gizmoduckus  (25-01-2014),Gracie's Mum  (30-12-2013),Lauzy  (30-12-2013),Mod-Degrassi  (30-12-2013),MsViking  (30-12-2013),Mum2adarlin  (21-01-2014),NewMrs  (30-12-2013),ourbradybunch  (25-01-2014),peanutmonkey  (30-12-2013),Purple Lily  (01-01-2014),PurpleButterfly4  (25-01-2014),SAgirl  (30-12-2013),trustno1  (30-12-2013),VicPark  (30-12-2013),~BEXTER~  (25-01-2014)

  6. #24
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Victoria
    Posts
    1,868
    Thanks
    3,216
    Thanked
    1,513
    Reviews
    4
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I agree with Waterlily, I'm having quite a strong reaction to your comments TBH. Not judging because of the casual relationship thing, think its great when that situation works out for all parties, but now there is a baby involved and you need to really grow up and be honest with everyone about what's going on. Too bad if someone doesn't like it, when you have s3x there is the risk of pregnancy (and disease) and it's both people's responsibility to deal with any consequences. In this case YOU have to decide FIRST if you want another baby, regardless of who the father is. Personally I'd go into the decision making as if there was no father around, as that's a pretty likely outcome based on the background you've outlined here.

  7. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to MsViking For This Useful Post:

    emzluvbub  (25-01-2014),Mod-Degrassi  (30-12-2013)

  8. #25
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    4,589
    Thanks
    1,302
    Thanked
    2,569
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by waterlily View Post
    You want to terminate if it's the nice guys who is being nothing but supportive but keep it if it's the guys who isn't happy about the pregnancy and your not even in a relationship with and are happy to lie to about the ehe situation....
    Sorry but I think you need to grow up and tell the truth. This baby didn't have any say in who it's father is.

    Make this decision based on the BABY! Do you want the baby? Not do you want x to be the father. Gosh!

    If your going to terminate at least do it for the right reasons!

    Good luck.
    I completely agree. You need to suck it up and tell both parties exactly what is going on.
    Base your decision on the baby not who the father is.

  9. #26
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    4,113
    Thanks
    2,899
    Thanked
    3,329
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Guy #1 will probably find out anyway. Stuff like this has a way of coming out.

  10. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Wise Enough For This Useful Post:

    lovebeingamum!  (30-12-2013),waterlily  (30-12-2013)

  11. #27
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Posts
    2,051
    Thanks
    8,078
    Thanked
    1,258
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I understand what you mean waterlily but having a go at the OP won't help her, it will only put her on the defensive and shame her. She's clearly already feeling horrible about it all, I doubt she needs help in that department. OP I think I understand where your head is at, and just wanted to point out that even though right now you feel that if the baby is guy 2's that you will terminate the pregnancy, i have a feeling you might still struggle to go through with a termination regardless. You clearly have feelings for guy 1, but he doesn't sound like he's in a good place right now. Ugh it sucks, we always fall for the unavailable one (emotionally or otherwise). Guy 2 does sound ok, and at least he sounds like he would be there for both you and the baby and not give you too much grief, or any possibly. Either way, it's still your baby- you have two scenarios baby is guy 1's who you have feelings for and hopefully could work it out with to keep your baby together, or guy 2 who sounds like a good guy, that you don't really have feelings for but would be a great support to you and baby regardless. Either situation isn't impossible really. Just some food for thought..

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to KaraB For This Useful Post:

    mrsd  (01-01-2014)

  13. #28
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Posts
    19
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    6
    Reviews
    0
    I feel sick with the stress of it all. I have no one to blame but myself, I know that.

    The thought has crossed my mind many times to tell the guy that I've been seeing the truth. Yes. Our relationship has been open, but this just takes it to a whole new level.

    I'll end up alone and pregnant and terminating out of shame.

    I can't think clearly at the moment. I'm trying to decide what decision I can live with and cope with best, but the paternity confusion is clouding my judgement.

  14. The Following User Says Thank You to mystique1 For This Useful Post:

    KaraB  (30-12-2013)

  15. #29
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Launceston
    Posts
    13,466
    Thanks
    732
    Thanked
    2,355
    Reviews
    35
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    I think you should talk to someone.
    It may really help.


    http://www.childrenbychoice.org.au/i...-pregnancy-new

    1800177725

  16. #30
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    1,622
    Thanks
    2,034
    Thanked
    804
    Reviews
    4
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I agree with waterlily. I also think it says something about possible DF2 that he is being supportive of whatever your choice is and offering to help pay for a paternity test. Possible DF1 hasn't really said anything. I'd also like to know why it's all falling on possible DF2? Possible DF1 should be contributing to a paternity test too IMO.

    It shouldn't matter who the father is. If you want the baby then you keep it, if you don't then you do what you need to do.

    Keeping the baby if it is possible DF1's isn't a guarantee you'll be with him either. You've been having a no strings with the man for 12 months. Doesn't sound to me like he's ready to commit any time soon. Even if you are having his baby.


 

Similar Threads

  1. Help with a situation at work
    By MyBubbaJack in forum Working Hubbers - Employed
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 16-08-2013, 07:16
  2. Messed up cycle since birth
    By Zombie_eyes in forum General Health
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 03-03-2013, 20:24

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Springfree Trampoline
Give the Ultimate Christmas Gift Springfree Trampoline
The World's Safest Trampoline™ is now also the world's first Smart Trampoline™. Sensors on the mat detect your every move and your jumps control fun, educational and active games on tablet. Secure the Ultimate Christmas Gift today!
sales & new stuffsee all
Pea Pods
Buy 2 Award Winning Pea Pods Reusable One Size Nappies for only $38 (in your choice of colours) and receive a FREE roll of Bamboo Liners. Don't miss out, we don't usually have discounts on the nappies, so grab this special offer!
Special Offer! Save $12
featured supporter
Philips AVENT Australia
Pregnancy and early parenthood is an exciting and challenging time, but it’s good to know there is expert advice on hand to ensure that your baby gets the best start in life.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!