+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 13
  1. #1
    Busy-Bee's Avatar
    Busy-Bee is offline Offending people since before Del :D
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Brisbane
    Posts
    11,185
    Thanks
    3,665
    Thanked
    4,704
    Reviews
    2
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Past Moderator - Thank you

    Default Anyone got any GOOD Christmas Cracker jokes?

    Each year I think the jokes can't get any worse then somehow the following year they just manage to dig a little deeper. So, I'm on a quest for GOOD Christmas Cracker/simple jokes to inject some festive cheer around the table and Christmas.

    The best one I've heard that I can remember (and this might not be suitable for little ears) is:

    A woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre so the bartender gave her one.

    This one falls below the benchmark:

    Why did Santa's helper see the doctor?



    Because he had a low "elf" esteem!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    297
    Thanks
    56
    Thanked
    154
    Reviews
    0
    They were talking about the Christmas cracker jokes on QI the other day. Apparently the reason they are so bad is to unite everyone. We all agree they are awful so it becomes us against the jokes. If the jokes were so-so then some people would like them and some would hate them and everyone would feel divided or defensive.

    Sorry, I don't have any jokes to help.

  3. #3
    Busy-Bee's Avatar
    Busy-Bee is offline Offending people since before Del :D
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Brisbane
    Posts
    11,185
    Thanks
    3,665
    Thanked
    4,704
    Reviews
    2
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Past Moderator - Thank you
    It was pointed out out me that by definition, Christmas Cracker jokes have to be bad. In light of this I'm now asking for bad Christmas Cracker jokes I've been perusing the "Dad Jokes" FB page which is has some promising material.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Posts
    4,443
    Thanks
    1,242
    Thanked
    1,713
    Reviews
    9
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    A couple of year ago I made my own crackers and I googled jokes that were so awful they were funny. Can't remember any now but I remember all having a good laugh come Christmas time.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to Mod-Zeddie For This Useful Post:

    CatesBean  (21-12-2013)

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    3,198
    Thanks
    213
    Thanked
    1,063
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    What do you call a sheep with no legs?

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    3,198
    Thanks
    213
    Thanked
    1,063
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    A cloud.

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to Lil M For This Useful Post:

    Busy-Bee  (22-12-2013)

  9. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Perth
    Posts
    8,544
    Thanks
    1,351
    Thanked
    2,307
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Why are teddy biscuits sad?
    Cause they have crummy legs...

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to sunnyflower For This Useful Post:

    Busy-Bee  (22-12-2013)

  11. #8
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Posts
    276
    Thanks
    108
    Thanked
    106
    Reviews
    0
    Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel Prize?
    For being outstanding in his field! 😃

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to RaaRaaMumma For This Useful Post:

    MoonMoon  (22-12-2013)

  13. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Posts
    138
    Thanks
    81
    Thanked
    57
    Reviews
    0
    How do you make a jacket last?

    Make the trousers first

  14. #10
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Posts
    319
    Thanks
    251
    Thanked
    180
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Zeddie View Post
    A couple of year ago I made my own crackers and I googled jokes that were so awful they were funny. Can't remember any now but I remember all having a good laugh come Christmas time.
    I'm making mine own this year and I've found some 'crackers' on the internet hehe. I love that they're awful!!

  15. The Following User Says Thank You to CatesBean For This Useful Post:

    Mod-Zeddie  (21-12-2013)


 

Similar Threads

  1. Is Jessie Mac a good choice? also Please suggest a good obstetrician there.
    By maggi2605 in forum Seeking a Maternity Hospital
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 04-08-2013, 14:58
  2. Crazy stories & "Dad jokes"
    By PeJu's Mum in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 15-07-2013, 10:57

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Einsteinz Music
Make music at Einsteinz Music in age-appropriate class in Sydney's Inner West, Eastern Suburbs or North Shore. For ages 6 mths - 4 yrs. All music is live! Christmas Gift certificates available for full term or casual classes. Call 0431 338 143
sales & new stuffsee all
True Fairies
True Fairies is the first interactive website where children can engage and speak with a real fairy through the unique webcam fairy portal. Each session is tailored to the child, and is filled with enchantment and magic.
Visit website to find out more!
featured supporter
Baby Sensory
Baby Sensory is the only baby programme that offers a complete approach to learning & development. Our classes offer an exciting world full of fun sensory experiences for parents and babies to enjoy.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!