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  1. #71
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    I haven't and won't use childcare.

  2. #72
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    Quote Originally Posted by TeBe View Post
    Do many of the sah mums use child care?

    My oldest is in school full time next year but I could put my nearly 2 year old in child care so I could have some free time for the rest of my pregnancy and once the baby comes.

    Do many of you use child care?
    In the past yes. My dd1 was in daycare 2-5 days a week from 8 months until she was 5 (on and off), my dd2 was in daycare 2 days a week when she was 3/4 and dd3 was in daycare 1 day a week from 12 months. Dd2 and dd3 only went for about a year and then it became too expensive. They loved going and were so upset when they had to stop.


    However next year dd2 will be in Kindy/pre-prep (not daycare so much cheaper) and im looking at putting dd3 in 1-2 days a week again.

    Daycare was my saviour during my last 3 pregnancies, especially my pregnancy with dd4 as dh works interstate and can be gone for weeks so having dd2 and dd3 in daycare even 1 or 2 days a week gave me that break, plus it was really beneficial for them. Dd2 was extremely shy and after starting daycare she really blossomed and became outgoing. Dd3 was similar- although she was always very outgoing, it helped her immensely in other areas. If they didnt enjoy going I wouldn't have sent them, but they loved it so it worked well for us apart from the cost!
    Last edited by SheWarrior; 31-12-2014 at 16:28.

  3. #73
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    I'm a temporary SAHM on mat leave soon to return to work. My ds1 is in daycare 3 days per week. If he wasn't we would lose his spot (and ds2!s) and there is a 1-2 year wait list to get a new spot.

    I must say having 3 days per week toddler free has saved my freakin sanity! It's been so nice to spend days at home with just bub, snuggling up, getting on top of housework. It has really helped with the bonding with DS2, he just doesn't get that quality time with me when DS1 is home. It allows me to recharge and then the two days DS1 is home I pack those days jam filled with activities. Daycare has been an awesome educational experience for DS1. The carers have taught him so much this year. And he has made heaps of friends.

    I would like to think if I was a SAHM permanently that I would keep ds1 in daycare 2-3 days for the socialization and educational benefits. But money would probably come and bite me on the **** with that idea.

    Anyhoo mute point since (although I have enjoyed my mat leave a lot more this time) I love my paid job too. And one wage just doesn't pay the bills where I live (and nope I am not prepared to downsize).

    I have a lot of respect for SAHM's. And childcare workers too!

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  5. #74
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    I'm a SAHM with 2 little boys (almost 3 and 1.5yrs). I don't use day care, and don't plan on it. The whole reason I'm home is to be with my kids so I don't see the point in spending money on daycare (just my opinion for my situation..what everyone else does is their own business).

    I am for the most part enjoying being at home with the kids. I don't miss work. I do miss adult conversations that I had at work though!

    We plan for me to stay home until the kids are at school and then I will look at returning to work I suppose, though part of me would love to continue the SAHM role so I can be active at their school.

  6. #75
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    I'm a SAHM, and I'm also a single mother, to a 19mo DS.

    He goes to childcare one day a week so I can get all my stuff done, for socializing, and for my slipping sanity. I do enjoy being a SAHM, but I also find it difficult.

  7. #76
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    Never used childcare here although dd1 has gone to occasional care for the past year ( only 3 hrs a fortnight) I feel its been great for preparing her for kindy

  8. #77
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    I'm a SAHM, we do send DD and DS to kindy a few days and they loooove it. Gives me a chance to clean, groceries, cook some nice meals etc and allows them to feel comfortable socially and not depend on myself of DH to hold their hand 24/7.

    DH wanted me to be at home and I'm greatful but do find it can be a bit bland unless I've got a lot on (new baby due in July should change all that )

    90% of my friends are full time working mums of 1-2 and I do sometimes feel a bit of justification is required in their opinion. I worked FT from 8 months until just recently and I would often wonder what SAHM did. So I see both sides but oh well, nobody else's business.

    I i too am looking forward to being involved in Prep and reading and all of those 'mumzie' activities shortly.

  9. #78
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    Quote Originally Posted by LysnDan View Post
    I have a 3yo DD and a stay at home mum.

    I do the odd relief work, but that's few and far between! I've done all of 2 shifts this year, only qualified in June.

    Not interested in day care. I don't believe that someone else should raise my child! (Child care poses a huge threat to us with dd's lungs/health issues!)
    I don't believe that someone else should raise my child!

    I am not one to get upset over much on BH these days, but the above sentence has left me flabbergasted.

    I am a SAHM. I used childcare one day per week for my first DD from the time she was 18m/o until she was 4. I didn’t send her so someone else could “raise my child”. I sent her because she was so shy and introverted that if I was in the room she literally did not leave my side. We are very social and did playgroup, story time, mum’s group, catch up with friends. Didnt matter how long my DD had known people (including her own grandparents), if I was around she would not under any circumstances engage with them. Child care was the best thing we could have done for her and she LOVED it. It’s been 2 years since she finished and she still talks about it and we still have regular catch ups with 3 girls she made friends with.

    DD2 didnt need childcare for the same reasons DD1 did but I sent her at age 2 simply because DD1 loved it so much. Well DD2 didnt like it, so I took her out after 2 months.

    The very very large majority of people who use childcare do not use it so someone else can raise their children. Most people do use it out of necessity, and if necessity means for them that it’s a sanity day because they are a single parent or a parent who wants a day to do other things, it still doesn’t mean they are doing it for someone else to raise their child.

    In my social circle I have one friend who is a single parent (with no financial support from her son's father) and she works in a very well paying job, she needs childcare so she can continue her job or when her son starts school she is back to square one with no job and a loss of her skills she has built up over time. Another friend of mine has a husband who was diagnosed with early onset dementia. Her DS was in childcare 3 days per week because my friend was exhausted being the full time carer for her husband and running around after an active little boy who didn’t sleep much. Both of these women would be pretty much devastated to think they’ve turned the responsibility of raising their child over to someone else.


    It’s pretty insulting to a lot of people on BH to insinuate that they are letting someone else raise their child.
    Last edited by GirlsRock; 01-01-2015 at 08:37.

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  11. #79
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    Quote Originally Posted by GirlsRock View Post
    I don't believe that someone else should raise my child!

    I am not one to get upset over much on BH these days, but the above sentence has left me flabbergasted.

    I am a SAHM. I used childcare one day per week for my first DD from the time she was 18m/o until she was 4. I didn’t send her so someone else could “raise my child”. I sent her because she was so shy and introverted that if I was in the room she literally did not leave my side. We are very social and did playgroup, story time, mum’s group, catch up with friends. Didnt matter how long my DD had known people (including her own grandparents), if I was around she would not under any circumstances engage with them. Child care was the best thing we could have done for her and she LOVED it. It’s been 2 years since she finished and she still talks about it and we still have regular catch ups with 3 girls she made friends with.

    DD2 didnt need childcare for the same reasons DD1 did but I sent her at age 2 simply because DD1 loved it so much. Well DD2 didnt like it, so I took her out after 2 months.

    The very very large majority of people who use childcare do not use it so someone else can raise their children. Most people do use it out of necessity, and if necessity means for them that it’s a sanity day because they are a single parent or a parent who wants a day to do other things, it still doesn’t mean they are doing it for someone else to raise their child.

    In my social circle I have one friend who is a single parent (with no financial support from her son's father) and she works in a very well paying job, she needs childcare so she can continue her job or when her son starts school she is back to square one with no job and a loss of her skills she has built up over time. Another friend of mine has a husband who was diagnosed with early onset dementia. Her DS was in childcare 3 days per week because my friend was exhausted being the full time carer for her husband and running around after an active little boy who didn’t sleep much. Both of these women would be pretty much devastated to think they’ve turned the responsibility of raising their child over to someone else.


    It’s pretty insulting to a lot of people on BH to insinuate that they are letting someone else raise their child.
    Perfectly said! I have read a number of times in this thread people saying this or similar. I have just become a SAHM & my DD is in daycare 2 days per week, seeing the attitude in this thread about SAHMs who use daycare has made me not want to participate!

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  13. #80
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    I'm a stay at home mum. I have my mum look after my son one day a week so I can clean, cook etc. I would seriously consider putting him in daycare 1 day a week.

    Doesn't bother me what other people say/think - that is their belief and their situation is different to every one else's. I wouldn't take it personally.

    I don't think they meant it as a reflection on other people.

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