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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by blissfulfairy View Post
    Ouch. I don't usually get offended on BH - congratulations.

    I was a SAHM up until 3 months ago when I had to return to work for financial reasons. Thankfully I only work 2 days a week, so I still get alot of quality time with my children.

    My children's needs and care is my number 1 priority. Unfortunately that means I have to bring in some money to help feed them and keep a roof over their heads.

    I would love to be a SAHM forever. I hope you appreciate how lucky you are.

    *Happiness is not a destination, it's a way of life*
    I agree. Ouch.
    I work nights, I don't really see myself as a working mother tho. I'm there daily with my 4yo and 2yo but unfortunalty to get ahead in life an extra income is needed. They are with DP/Dad at night so I don't really see a problem, their bond with daddy has grown so much, I'll still do all the P&C things I want to, school drop off/pick ups.

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by blissfulfairy View Post
    Ouch. I don't usually get offended on BH - congratulations.

    I was a SAHM up until 3 months ago when I had to return to work for financial reasons. Thankfully I only work 2 days a week, so I still get alot of quality time with my children.

    My children's needs and care is my number 1 priority. Unfortunately that means I have to bring in some money to help feed them and keep a roof over their heads.

    I would love to be a SAHM forever. I hope you appreciate how lucky you are.

    *Happiness is not a destination, it's a way of life*
    This. I work, but only because I absolutely have to for financial reasons. Not to live the life of luxury but just to pay the bills. It's pretty offensive to assume that people don't care about their kids because they aren't SAHMs.

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  4. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by lilyp View Post
    Yes I really love it too! I just didn't realise how few of us there were in our school community. It seems like looking after ones children is really secondary. I really noticed it too on our recent family holiday. I think we were the only family who didn't use a nanny 24/7!
    I find that post really offensive, just because I have to work does not mean I don't look after my children or think of them as secondary. Would it be better to sit at home and not be able to feed or clothe my children? Just because people aren't as lucky as you doesn't make us any less of a parent then you at all

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  6. #24
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    Just a thought - why can't women or mothers have both? Why do we have to justify working, having a career?
    Mothers are the worst to criticize other mothers on the choices they make.
    It's ok to work, it's ok to have a career and its ok to be a stay at home mummy!
    I love that I stayed home for 12 months with my DD and now work part time helping other families! It really is what works for you and your family!!

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  8. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bubintummy View Post
    This. I work, but only because I absolutely have to for financial reasons. Not to live the life of luxury but just to pay the bills. It's pretty offensive to assume that people don't care about their kids because they aren't SAHMs.
    I saw the OPs post last night but didn't say anything.. I also took offense. I'm not sure that OP intended to offend but I have to say flinched a bit when I saw it. But I agree with what Ive quoted and similar as posted above. I'm not a SAHM. Would love to be. In fact, there's often a case of mothers guilt when I sit at my desk at work and tear up because I miss DS so much and haven't been able to attend certain things at daycare. Yes. I use daycare. :O
    I have number 2 on the way and will be returning to work when she is 6 months. Financially, it's still better for me to work than stay home. So, yes. Appreciate the time you have at home with your kids.

  9. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Littlemisshappy View Post
    Just a thought - why can't women or mothers have both? Why do we have to justify working, having a career?
    Mothers are the worst to criticize other mothers on the choices they make.
    It's ok to work, it's ok to have a career and its ok to be a stay at home mummy!
    I love that I stayed home for 12 months with my DD and now work part time helping other families! It really is what works for you and your family!!
    Very well put.

  10. #27
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    I'm a SAHM and also find that we are a rare breed. Times have changed, most people either can't afford to or don't want to (not because they don't adore their children but because it can be hard for some people to be a SAHM). Also some Mothers can't SAH if they are trying to build a carer that will ultimately set them up in the future.

    My DD is 4 and DS is 5 months old.
    DDs going to school next year and I will happily stay home until DS is in school. TBH I'd happily stay home for a few years after they are both in school full time. I'd really like to help out at school and be very involved in their schooling and the PTA. It will really depend on what financial situation we are in when the time comes.
    Last edited by waterlily; 17-12-2013 at 07:25.

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  12. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by lilyp View Post
    Yes I really love it too! I just didn't realise how few of us there were in our school community. It seems like looking after ones children is really secondary. I really noticed it too on our recent family holiday. I think we were the only family who didn't use a nanny 24/7!
    Nominee for most offensive post for 2013.

    What a downright *****y thing to say.

    And what on earth is the connection between working parents & a 24/7 nanny on a family holiday?

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  14. #29
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    I was a SAHM for about 8months after DD was born and now work 3 days a week. Most mums I know work part time, in my experience OP you're right - there's not many SAHMs around. I am 9wks pregnant with #2 and hoping to stay home for 12 months this time.

    I do enjoy being home but I don't think it's really something I want to do for the long-term. DD (and future bub) are my absolute first priority above all else - I guess the way I approach it is different to you. For me, having DD in daycare 3 days a week means she has a great time and learns heaps while I'm earning money to help provide her with a secure home and opportunities for the future. I am also working and studying because I suffered depression being a SAHM and working/studying really helps me.

    It always amazes me that when mothers go to work they are accused of having someone else raise their kids, but most men work and my DH would be highly offended if someone told him he wasn't raising DD!

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  16. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Littlemisshappy View Post
    Just a thought - why can't women or mothers have both? Why do we have to justify working, having a career?
    Mothers are the worst to criticize other mothers on the choices they make.
    It's ok to work, it's ok to have a career and its ok to be a stay at home mummy!
    I love that I stayed home for 12 months with my DD and now work part time helping other families! It really is what works for you and your family!!
    *sigh* this is a good post! I wish everyone would just stop this ole debate. We should all be on the one team. I think it's only on BH because IRL no one cares. In my family I am the only sahm and all I get is how great I am to be able to stay at home. To all my working friends and family I constantly tell them how great they are for doing both. We are all great mothers no matter what we are doing because everything we do is for our children.

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