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  1. #31
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    Could it be because people will be consuming alcohol? I understand you wouldn't be but she may not feel comfortable with having children/babies around people who are drunk and may get rowdy, especially because it's her wedding she may not want to have to stress about it if someone got out of hand. ( I'm just thinking reception wise, not so much the ceremony).

    Just an idea, I personally wouldn't have a problem with kids/babies at my wedding but everyone is different.

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Katey4 View Post
    Could it be because people will be consuming alcohol? I understand you wouldn't be but she may not feel comfortable with having children/babies around people who are drunk and may get rowdy, especially because it's her wedding she may not want to have to stress about it if someone got out of hand. ( I'm just thinking reception wise, not so much the ceremony).

    Just an idea, I personally wouldn't have a problem with kids/babies at my wedding but everyone is different.
    No I doubt it, it's probably more that she just wants a kid free wedding. It wouldn't have anything to do with alcohol, and like I said, I get that as we had no kids at ours either, but we did allow very young babies.

    She doesn't have kids yet so that's why she wouldn't fully grasp the idea if how difficult it is to leave your newborn. Plus I don't think rowdy adults would even cross her mind, after all, kids are their parents responsibility, not hers.

  3. #33
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    I think her choosing to have absolutely no children, whilst wouldn't be a choice I would make, is her choice, and I'd respect it. However if she then got cranky when you said you wont ve able to make it because of your new bub, then that is unfair. She cannot expect you to respect her wishes when she doesnt respect your choice to put your child first.

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  4. #34
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    I took dd to 2 weddings before she was 6 months. She is still bf and I couldn't leave her with a sitter as she won't take a bottle.
    It seems strange to me.
    I had a no kids rule at my wedding, but babies aren't kids!
    I agree.. As its 7 hours away I would try and encourage dh to stay home too.. But that's me!

  5. #35
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    This happened at my cousins wedding. Apparently the venue charge $100 extra for each extra person, regardless of age and the fact they won't eat or drink anything! DS was older (nearly one) so we had my inlaws come stay in a hotel with us and we went to the wedding without DS but I could feed him when I got home . At 3 or 4 months, I probably wouldn't go.

  6. #36
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    I had a friend who did this. She wanted to refuse to let her now sister in law bring her fully bf infant to the wedding, which was also several hours from their home. It caused huge issues with her fiance's family, there were fights and tears.

    Personally, I think it is a bit unreasonable to expect parents of young and fully dependent children to leave them either overnight back home or with a strange babysitter at the wedding location. I was happy for the parents of infants to bring them along, it never really occurred to me to say no.

    However each to their own. They have every right to refuse to have infants at their wedding. You have every right to say no. I probably would choose not to go in your situation.

  7. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by peanutmonkey View Post
    I think her choosing to have absolutely no children, whilst wouldn't be a choice I would make, is her choice, and I'd respect it. However if she then got cranky when you said you wont ve able to make it because of your new bub, then that is unfair. She cannot expect you to respect her wishes when she doesnt respect your choice to put your child first.

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    She hasn't got cranky that I said we may not come, she actually seems like she doesn't give a damn. Fair enough, I'd rather just not have been invited in the first place though to be honest.

    I was more referring to her DF probably wanting my DH there and being upset if he didn't come, but as you said, they can't expect us to put them first when they can't accommodate our near newborn baby.

  8. #38
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    I was a bridesmaid in my SILs wedding when DD1 was 12 weeks old. The wedding was about 45 minutes from my house and SIL told me when I was pregnant that DD would NOT be able to attend and could I get my Mum to have her overnight. Thankfully my Mum was able to stay with us so I fed DD before going to the church and then again before the reception and then my Mum took her home and bought her back to me at 7am the next morning (oh my poor b00bs) NOW, 4 years down the track and my SIL has her own child, she has apologised profusely for her craziness and when her own baby was 12 weeks old she burst into tears and told her husband how horrible they were for not letting me take DD to their wedding.....I hope your bride realises the same thing when she has her own children.

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  10. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by GirlsRock View Post
    I was a bridesmaid in my SILs wedding when DD1 was 12 weeks old. The wedding was about 45 minutes from my house and SIL told me when I was pregnant that DD would NOT be able to attend and could I get my Mum to have her overnight. Thankfully my Mum was able to stay with us so I fed DD before going to the church and then again before the reception and then my Mum took her home and bought her back to me at 7am the next morning (oh my poor b00bs) NOW, 4 years down the track and my SIL has her own child, she has apologised profusely for her craziness and when her own baby was 12 weeks old she burst into tears and told her husband how horrible they were for not letting me take DD to their wedding.....I hope your bride realises the same thing when she has her own children.
    I was just thinking this. The bride obviously has no children and has no idea the significance of what she's expecting of you.

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  11. #40
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    Geez that's a it much isn't it? Just reading through the thread. We didn't have any kids at out wedding except one friend who asked to bring her little boy with her and her husband. I think from memory he was about 1 at the time and not breast feeding but she didn't feel comfortable leaving him. So he was the only child there and really I left it to his parents to look after him in regards to alcohol and people drinking etc. that's their job as they are the parent. I think your friends being a bit precious. Wedding are to celebrate and if the only way that I could celebrate with my friend was for her little boy to come that was fine with me.


 

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