I was told to lose 40 lbs or more to help get pregnant and I done that. I got nowhere. I went through painful test and got nowhere. I have PCOS and it has shattered me from the very depth of my soul. Four years know trying to have a child of my own and got nowhere. I am to hard headed to give up. Some days I do want to give up ad say to myself "You need to start learning to deal and heal because its just not going to happen" Then other days I am like okay just one more month of trying. I got where I hate having sex. The thought of having sex makes me mad. Because I all I can think about while having sex is this the time that it happens. I don't know what to do and I feel so lost. I feel like there is no hope. I feel guilty about not wanting to go to friends houses because they have small children because I usually have some sort of break down in the bathroom. It pulls at my heart strings to go shopping and pass baby clothing. I don't know what to do. Should I give up and work on the healing process of never being a mother?