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  1. #61
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    Rainbow - thanks for reminding everyone of this as well. I learnt that from this forum too. You've got to question some things to a certain extent and this is one of them re. the "proven donor" and actual details of what that means, numbers etc. Smoking - that was something I just couldn't get over either when I was looking last time. I just saw one before that was maybe worth looking at further, and she smoked 10/day. It put me off. Gosh, maybe I'm been too fussy, young girls get pregnant all the time when smoking... its just we are paying and investing so much for this. So.... I'm having this constant battle all over again as well. And loving it... NOT !

    Oh Blinky
    It is so so difficult isn't it. I am just starting to dabble back on the donor websites in search of another donor, and it's not easy. I think it sounds pretty good that you have 2 even! And now maybe a 3rd. I have the same thing, proven vrs non proven. I was only looking at proven the first time. This time, I'm aiming for the same.. but could be dismissing "the one" by doing that. It's not an easy road. As the agencies said to me last time I went through all this "Take your time, its the most important decision, and you have to be 100% happy with your choice" - if only it was that easy, and someone just bounced out at you - saying I'm the one. Done, dusted, excitement kicks in and then you an move onto testing, treatment plans, booking flights and moving closer to your exciting trip of a lifetime and ultimately a precious baby on its way.


    Quote Originally Posted by Blinky76 View Post
    Sooty- thanks for the advice
    DH and I have got it down to two choices and that's where it gets tricky, neither fulfil all our criteria.
    Our criteria was pretty simple:
    Under 30
    Non smoker
    Dutch heritage (the big draw card for going to SA as it matches my heritage)
    A blood type
    Unfortunately our two choice don't match those...
    My choice matches those except she is 32 (very healthy lifestyle- that's my argument )
    DH choice is a smoker

    .... I then found an alternate who matched the criteria but wasn't a proven donor...(that worries us a bit..?)
    Maybe we aren't as close as we thought...
    Last edited by sootymay; 01-12-2013 at 08:24.

  2. #62
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    Good morning everyone, just wanted to wish everyone the best of luck in their searches. It's a stressful time. Please remember though that even the proven donors had to have a first time and I wonder what effect it has on the donors eggs doing back to back cycles. My cycle was my donors first and she produced 15 eggs, 11 fertilised and I have 6 "A" grade blasts on ice. I'm also almost 19 weeks and was successful first go. Just wanted to put it out there that sometimes this works with unproven donors too. I chose on health aspects and family history, then personal characteristics. Everyone is different :-) It's also important to remember that older sperm can influence cycles too so don't assume it's always the egg that's the problem :-) I'm on this journey alone and my success may have also come because of the 22 year old sperm donor too.

    Every good wish to those heading over to SA. Biggest hugs to those who need them. This journey isn't for the faint hearted. But we're all courageous women and I know you'll get there in the end.

    Best wishes

    Wish
    xx
    Last edited by wishmeluck; 01-12-2013 at 10:52.

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    sootymay  (01-12-2013)

  4. #63
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    Wishmeluck - you are so correct sometimes its not just the sperm, but can most definitely be recipient related. I think that there are too many donors registered with too many different agencies doing back to back cycles and I believe this most definitely would effect the outcome of the cycle.

    Donor choice is a really hard and personal thing. I don't envy any of you who are going through it at the moment, but I think you just have to go with the donor that suits your needs and wants best.


  5. The Following User Says Thank You to Rainbowchaser For This Useful Post:

    sootymay  (01-12-2013)

  6. #64
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    Hi all,

    just on the 'back to back' cycles - I asked about this as I saw a couple of agencies with the same couple of donors and this was a concern of mine.

    Apparently CFC monitor this and will not allow anyone to cycle within in 3 months of their last cycle. So even if the agency sends the donor for assessment, CFC would pick it up as I'm sure they have to show ID etc to donate. It was something that weighed on my mind as I know how crap my body felt after a stim cycle... oh and the maximum amount of times they are allowed to donate is 5 or something... one of the agencies emailed me the figure but I can't recall what it was right now.

    On the bright side if your donor is with more than one agency you can choose her from the cheaper one! (Always looking for a silver lining!).

    Sooty - I'm getting to your PM now!

    Thanks
    Em
    Last edited by emski72; 01-12-2013 at 14:26.

  7. #65
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    Emski - the CFC is not the only clinic in Cape Town and don't forget donors can be paid to travel to other clinics around SA too. There is absolutely no way the CFC could ever monitor this unless they owned the other clinics also.

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to Rainbowchaser For This Useful Post:

    sootymay  (01-12-2013)

  9. #66
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    Ahh right yeah hadn't thought of that ... another thing to worry about lol!

  10. #67
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    Quick question for you all as I'm already worried about my timing etc. We want to do our donor cycle in mid to late March - so I think we will pick our donor in approx 3-4 weeks...
    I can't get in to discuss my donor cycle with my FS and get my scripts etc until Jan 22 - will this timing be ok or will it be running too late? How long before your approx time in SA do you start your meds?

    thanks
    Em x

  11. #68
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    DONOR SEARCHING
    mayaus (Cape Town - ET ?)
    francesthecat (Cape Town - ET ?)
    Crystal4431 (Zlin - ET 28 Jan)
    January (Cape Town - ET ? Mar)
    Sahndi (Cape Town - ET ?)
    Emski72 (Cape Town - ET ? Mar)

    Blinky76 (Cape Town - ET ?)
    Sootymay (Cape Town - ET ?)

    DONOR SELECTED

    Angelmama74 (Cape Town - ET ? April)

    Lily72 (Cape Town - ET ? May)
    DJShears (Cape Town - ET ?)

    DONOR CONTRACT (signed by both parties)
    thembs (Cape Town - ET 5 Feb)
    PeaSoup (Cape Town - ET ? Dec)

    COMMENCED MEDICATIONS
    Helenmac (Cape Town - ET ? Dec)
    Abundance1 (Cape Town - FET ? Dec)

    IN CAPE TOWN/BARBADOS FOR PROCEDURES

    Net3811 (Barbados - ET 6 Dec)


    2WW - WAITING FOR BFP

    BFP
    BB4Me (2x5D)
    Helonweels (2x5D - singleton)
    Pixel (2x4D - singleton)
    Rainbowchaser (2x3D frozen- singleton) EDD 19/5/14
    Wishmeluck (1x5D - singleton)
    Sunny15 (2x5D - singleton) - EDD 16/4/14
    Anait (2x5D - singleton)
    Jennilee67 (2x5D - singleton)
    BJ04 (1x5D - singleton) - EDD 26/3/14
    AllieOop (2x5D - singleton)
    Araline (2x5D)
    TwoWhites (2x5D - singleton)

    GRADUATES

    Sardy (girl)
    Nicole72 (twin girls)

    Missleo (boy & girl - 28/9/13)
    SVD (twin boys - 6/9/13)

    Laned (boy - 24/4/13)
    JodiW (boy)
    Smika (girl)
    Chascabear
    Sahndi (boy)
    Theresa68 (girl)
    WilsonJoy (twin boys)
    Jed (boy & girl)
    SummerShine (boy)
    Sally08 (twins)

    2013 STATS

    BFP = 19 (16 fresh & 3 frozen/4 sets of twins)
    BFN = 13 (10 fresh & 3 frozen)

    Pregnancy Loss = 1
    Bio-chemical = 2
    Unkown Results = 7

  12. #69
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    Emski - you would most likely start on the contraceptive pill first to sync your cycle so your GP should be able to do that and might even be able to assist you with many or all of the meds you need for your cycle.

    I was not trying to alarm you by my previous post. I felt like I went into the donor selection process blindly. It is definitely the most important part of all of this. I am sure if you stick to the agencies the CFC recommend (they are on that list for a reason) and you speak to Dr L R about the donors you have on your wish list, you will be on the right path.

    Dr L R knew my frozen donor very well as she had donated there several times before. He was able to give me a little bit more information beyond what was contained in the agency profile because of this. I will also point out that the five frozen donors he presented to us were all from the CFC's recommended agency list.
    Last edited by Rainbowchaser; 01-12-2013 at 22:00.

  13. #70
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    Thank you ladies for all your valuable insight... DH and I have been discussing those very thoughts today (proven vs non proven) . We have already made initial contact with Dr LR and CFC and have only searched the donor profiles from the sites they recommended. at this stage the debate is between a donor at Nurture and one at sunshine. One is a proven donor (profile says 16 eggs in a cycle in sept.: however when I asked the agency they said 6! I have emailed for clarification. Her cycle resulted in a pregnancy) however this donor is 29 and a smoker.
    The other donor is 27 non smoker but not a previous donor/ no children of her own (she is single).
    I am leaning towards the younger non smoker: DH likes the 'cuter' photo of the older smoker.... WWYD??
    Is it worth getting AMH testing done?


 

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