+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 34
  1. #11
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Posts
    2,051
    Thanks
    8,078
    Thanked
    1,258
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Also I have been through this before and he had actually got the other woman pregnant on purpose and told me casually not to judge him and that she was 3 months along and might be busy for the next few years. Like seriously! I was just like you completely floored and so unbelievably angry. If you're anything like me that feeling will turn into complete apathy later on, you won't ever fall back in love with him again once you've been able to process it all- and rightly so. He sounds an awful lot like my ex and he never really ever stopped hitting on me even after he got into another relationship. It made me realize that he didn't treat me this way because I'm not good enough or anything like that- he's actually like this with who ever he is with. Hence the reason I call him a man child. He can't handle not being the center or attention he needs nothing less than adoration but rarely returns it. He will follow where ever his hard on leads him and he will be nice depending on his mood and when he feels the need he will say the most hurtful things in anger and expect it all to be forgotten when 'he' gets over it. Sound familiar? You will get over him and this, I promise! Save yourself for some wonderful deserving man. But be prepared for your ex to be jealous even if he's with someone when that happens, what a laugh right? Just ignore him- he can't ever be taken seriously again. Let yourself be angry, it's part of the process just don't do or say anything rash until you've had time to settle down. I know it's tempting to blast him, and by all means go for it but only do it once and then leave him cold. Give him nothing more of your time and energy. Huge hugs* Please feel free to pm me any time if you need to vent or whatever

  2. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to KaraB For This Useful Post:

    experience88  (24-11-2013),MinkyJ  (03-12-2013)

  3. #12
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Posts
    2,051
    Thanks
    8,078
    Thanked
    1,258
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I'm not suggesting you do anything but I wonder how this other woman would feel knowing he was sleeping with you while he was with her? Chances are he will F it up either way. But wow, I don't know how special id be feeling if I were her knowing I was part of an each way bet...

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to KaraB For This Useful Post:

    experience88  (24-11-2013)

  5. #13
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    267
    Thanks
    40
    Thanked
    14
    Reviews
    0
    thanks for your replies and support. doesn't matter if you're putting it bluntly or not, i do want to hear what you have to say because i do occasionally need to be reminded of how disgusting he is so it can ease the pain a bit.
    i think what also hurt is that (i've spoken to him twice) and he seemingly... isn't that affected by it. sure he thinks it 'sucks' or is 'harsh', but can't relate to how i feel like i've been kicked in the guts and had my world turned upside down. there is a long history of bullsh*t with him, but i didnt see this coming and i am p**sed off at myself for that part of it. i've stoop by him through SO much ridiculous crap and to think that he thinks such little of me, that this sort of disrespect is what i deserved... is mind boggling.
    he is 35 (i'm 25) with 2 other children from a previous relationship and almost the exact same thing happened with that one, though i suppose it is only hindsight that i know that and learnt the truth through sorting it out from all the LIES.
    he initially told me that he met from person from the internet and knew her from a week a half (tho, had stronger feelings for her..), i now know from other people, that he actually works with her (so that's nearly a year), and god knows how long this could have been going on for.
    to think that he was sleeping with me and sleeping with her at the same time... is so overwhelming i cant even actually think about. the pain is too much. i hate that i sound so melodramatic, i really do, but this is genuinely just how i feel!!
    I'm not suggesting you do anything but I wonder how this other woman would feel knowing he was sleeping with you while he was with her? Chances are he will F it up either way. But wow, I don't know how special id be feeling if I were her knowing I was part of an each way bet...
    i did message her via facebook the day i found out, but she obviously didnt care and i know theyve seen each other since. im sure he has told her im the crazy ex-gf and mother of his kids and all this sh*t was just in my mind!!!! who the hells knows... maybe they'll be blissfulyl happy together, maybe he really never loved me and therefore acted like such a bas.tard...better luck for her. that shouldnt be my focus anyway, ive just finished my diploma and will be starting my advanced diploma soon and am solely responsible for my 2 and 3 yr old, so how she fairs in their relationship.. well i dont really give a sh*t tbh.

    thanks for your reply KaraB and your offer to talk, i'm sure i'll take you up on it. like i said, ive never actually had a girlfriend who has gone through something similiar, i'm 25 and none of my friends have kids either.

    anyway, for now i feel like a zombie and i just try and keep it all out of my mind.. every now and then, at the most inconvenient moments, it creeps into my thoughts and the pain floods back in. ive been nauseous since thursday and still am, NOT enjoying that part of it (and no not pregnant lol). i've been slightly grumpy with the kids and i do feel bad abt it, i just need some quiet time though. when i look at them, i just start crying though lol. that amplify what im feeling, so it's kind of difficult.

    THANKYOU BUB HUB FORUM, being able to vent all of this messy, crazy thought does help.. if even only a little bit.

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to experience88 For This Useful Post:

    KaraB  (24-11-2013)

  7. #14
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    5,687
    Thanks
    1,089
    Thanked
    4,057
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Oh wow.

    What a class A a$$hole. I'm so sorry he's not what you thought he was.

    Please, please, please don't ever let him back in any form. You're worth far more than settling for him.

    Don't pay her any mind, she's irrelevant, this is entirely on him, who knows what rubbish he's been feeding her and she'll see him for who he is in due course.

    It's a bit different, but I imagine a lot of the hurt is the same. My ex-husband had a long term love/physical affair with a coworker. The only thing about the affair that truly crushes me is that he wanted her more than the beautiful family we made together, it just makes no sense when you yourself can't imagine anything ever being better than your family.

    That selfishness and revelation that his family could be second to a younger, thinner, prettier, less exhausted, childless version of me is the biggest turn off ever. He repulses me now.

    You'll be absolutely fine, find the silver linings, I'm sure your family will have only love, support and concern for you.

  8. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to BlissedOut For This Useful Post:

    CakeyMumma  (24-11-2013),experience88  (24-11-2013),KaraB  (24-11-2013),mrsoptomistic  (24-11-2013)

  9. #15
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    267
    Thanks
    40
    Thanked
    14
    Reviews
    0
    thanks for your reply BlissedOut... yes what you described exactly the same hurt!
    how did you feel and how did you deal with such an extreme betrayal?

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to experience88 For This Useful Post:

    KaraB  (24-11-2013)

  11. #16
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    267
    Thanks
    40
    Thanked
    14
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by KaraB View Post
    Also I have been through this before and he had actually got the other woman pregnant on purpose and told me casually not to judge him and that she was 3 months along and might be busy for the next few years.
    and yes there is NO DOUBT in my mind he will knock her up, like he did with me and the mum of his other kids. and when that happens, frankly i'll be extremely pi**ed off that my kids have half siblings bloody scattered all over the place because he seemingly has no control over his filthy p.enis.

  12. #17
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    5,687
    Thanks
    1,089
    Thanked
    4,057
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by experience88 View Post
    thanks for your reply BlissedOut... yes what you described exactly the same hurt!
    how did you feel and how did you deal with such an extreme betrayal?
    I knew I couldn't change what he'd done, so I sucked it up and became his good friend for the sake of our kids, as they are so much more important than wanting to hurt him back, or even hate him. I focused on me, the things I wanted and I made new goals, got new hopes and dreams, created a life without him as my partner...

    It still hurts, he still disgusts me, I still feel extremely bitter at times, but I don't let that dictate my behaviour, or life.

    Set yourself free from it, don't let it weigh you down, you can't change it, it's done.

    Life has so much more to offer you, focus on that and it'll make things much easier.

  13. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to BlissedOut For This Useful Post:

    experience88  (24-11-2013),KaraB  (24-11-2013),lovebeingamum!  (28-12-2013),Pesca77  (24-11-2013)

  14. #18
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Posts
    2,051
    Thanks
    8,078
    Thanked
    1,258
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    OP it takes time to get to a peaceful place of resolve and in my experience you have to wade through some yucky feelings to get there first. But that's ok, and normal. It takes time, cliche' but true. For me when I'm angry and or anxious I clean- it gives me an energetic outlet with a positive outcome. Studying is great! just keep your focus on your goals and keep mentally shutting him out. It can sometimes help to even imagine yourself closing blinds in a way to that d*ck head metaphorically speaking.

  15. The Following User Says Thank You to KaraB For This Useful Post:

    experience88  (24-11-2013)

  16. #19
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    267
    Thanks
    40
    Thanked
    14
    Reviews
    0
    it's hurting it's hurting it's hurting...

  17. #20
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Posts
    2,051
    Thanks
    8,078
    Thanked
    1,258
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Hugs** It's still early days. Can you sleep at all? It helps. So does excersise, you really need a physical outlet for all that anger.


 

Similar Threads

  1. *spin off* posting history
    By atomicmama in forum General Chat
    Replies: 37
    Last Post: 06-11-2013, 13:56
  2. The 62 worst names in human history!
    By Mod-Degrassi in forum General Chat
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 26-06-2013, 10:15

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Riverton Leisureplex
An Extreme Family Pass at Riverton Leisureplex is the ultimate way to cool off during the summer school holidays. The $30 Pass allows pool and waterslide access for 2 adults and 2 children, as well as a drink, popcorn and an icy pole for each person.
sales & new stuffsee all
Wendys Music School Melbourne
Wondering about Music Lessons? FREE 30 minute ASSESSMENT. Find out if your child is ready! Piano from age 3 years & Guitar, Singing, Drums, Violin from age 5. Lessons available for all ages. 35+ years experience. Structured program.
Use referral 'bubhub' when booking
featured supporter
GymbaROO
GymbaROO offers activities for babies & toddlers in a fun learning centre, focussing on developmental education. Classes are available Australia-wide. Enrol today & help your child to reach their full potential. Visit the website to find out more.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!