Thanks kw I appreciate you saying that. I happy to take other opinions on board I just can't if I feel hostility towards me. I know I need to let go a bit and I am trying to. It's very hard when you come from the experiences that I have come from. It's a very long story, none of it is simple. I just don't want this thread turning into a **** fight. It wasnt my intention. I was only looking for support and possibly constructive criticism.