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  1. #1
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    Default Is your toddler/child shy or outgoing and

    And do you think it's just their personality or the way you raised them?

    My SIL and I are the same kind of outgoing personality and my DS is as well but her DD is very shy and clingy and SIL was asking today how can she make her DD more like my DS but I kind of think its mainly just his personality and you can't really change it? Or can you???

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    I reckon it's personality. Just like adults. You can do things to make them feel encouraged and comfortable but I dont think you can change them if you know what I mean.

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    MsViking  (23-11-2013)

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    Just to add. My DD is mostly outgoing. I just think that's the way she is.

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    Quote Originally Posted by smallpotatoes View Post
    I reckon it's personality. Just like adults. You can do things to make them feel encouraged and comfortable but I dont think you can change them if you know what I mean.
    I agree. My DS1 is outgoing and if you let him, very affectionate with anyone!

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    I used to be worried that my eldest was shy because I hadn't put her in daycare. I've since realised that she's always been introverted and I don't think daycare would have made a difference.

    I actually think forcing her into heaps of social activities too soon would have made her really anxious. I did worry about her starting preschool, but she was fine and now she's at school she has a good group of friends, and although she doesn't like speaking in front of the class/assembly, she is able to do it (and appears confident when she does it).

    My middle child is outgoing, makes friends easily and also didn't go to daycare or playgroup or any other activities (just preschool when she turned 3). But she's always been quite outgoing and likes being the centre of attention!

    And my youngest is very friendly and outgoing and is in daycare.
    But she is also the most clingy when I'm around.

    I don't think I've parented them that differently, so I think it's probably their personalities.
    Last edited by 1234Guest; 22-11-2013 at 19:31.

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    My 3.5 year old DD is extremely outgoing and social. I am not particularly outgoing and I think it is just her personality to be that way.
    We were out for lunch last week and she was making silly faces at a grandfather (probably in his 80's) across the room and giggling at the silly faces he was pulling. When she finished her food she told me had she wanted to go play with her friend now, meaning the old man lol. She makes friends wherever we go!

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    I think definitely personality. DH and I are neither introverted nor extroverted, more somewhere in between but DS is definitely an extrovert and will "introduce" himself to any stranger adult or child he meets "chatting" away a mile a minute.

    It's the way he has been since forever and he's never been to day care or away from me much in his life.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Just*Ace View Post
    My 3.5 year old DD is extremely outgoing and social. I am not particularly outgoing and I think it is just her personality to be that way.
    We were out for lunch last week and she was making silly faces at a grandfather (probably in his 80's) across the room and giggling at the silly faces he was pulling. When she finished her food she told me had she wanted to go play with her friend now, meaning the old man lol. She makes friends wherever we go!
    I think we have the same child lol.

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    My DD is extremely confident, she was born that way. Seriously when she was a newborn she didn't cry for what she wanted, she YELLED.

    However I think confident, outgoing children can become shy, anxious and withdrawn by being mistreated, but the opposite isn't true - I don't think an introverted, quiet personality can really be changed.

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    Madame Mayhem is offline Who you are is who you should be, don't change for anyone
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    I believe it is personality, not upbringing.


    I have one of each, and they have had the same upbringing. DS is shy and introverted and doesnt take to new people of situations easily, where as DD is the complete opposite, loud, outgoing and a social little butterfly who thrives on change.

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