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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by KaraB View Post
    I'm not interested in turning this into an argument at all. I just want to support the OP with whatever decision she makes
    Neither am I (I didn't realise we were arguing?). And I agree.

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    KaraB  (18-11-2013)

  3. #32
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    We aren't lol I just don't think what was said was particularly offensive, it was meant with love and a desire for another woman not to go through what she has. No one has the right to tell a woman what to do in this situation of course. But I don't believe that's what happened. Advice is just that, advice. Lord knows I've had plenty of it in the last few weeks, today even from my fob. He's hell bent on me terminating but I choose not to do what he would like, but that's another story..
    Last edited by KaraB; 18-11-2013 at 20:19.

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  5. #33
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    OP, what is clear to me from your further responses is that you are thinking so much about your partner's family. I understand that he is young, but entering into a sexual relationship with someone means having to have the maturity to accept responsibility for what occurs during that relationship. His parents may or may not be supportive, or may make things difficult, but at the end of the day it isn't their life. Your partner may turn out to be more supportive than you predict, and it's tough to be going through this alone.

    When you talk about your own feelings, they seem to be based on logical matters. Which is important, I agree, but your own feelings and needs are just as valid as, and I would even argue more so, your partner's or his parents'. As I said before, there are systems in place that you may be able to access that will help you out financially, and learning more about them may alleviate some of your concerns. Whichever you decide, you will have support on here.

    I just wanted to add that you may decide to terminate and know that it is the right decision for you and still feel affected emotionally. Please seek out counselling - I am sure some Sydneysiders here can point you in the direction of some free or cheap places. And, if you do decide termination is the best option for you, please believe this - you are NOT evil. Not even close.

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  7. #34
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    Hugs x

  8. #35
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    Whoa...some people need to chill out. I was just telling her what my experience was and yes I do strongly advise against abortions to keep your partner happy! I'm not scared to say that. My opinion as I've been through it and live with the guilt!

    Thanks Kara for actually 'getting' what I meant! Xx

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    GlitterFarts  (21-11-2013),KaraB  (18-11-2013),minniemarta  (18-11-2013)

  10. #36
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    Firstly, big big hugs for you. Please take a deep breath and relax. You won't find any judgement here. Many beautiful ladies posting on bubhub, to some extent, have been through what you are going through right now. Some will offer you advice from experience and others, like myself, will try to help in any way they can- be it a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, whatever you need. We are here for you.

    Can I ask you where your family is from? You mention returning to Australia but you say you have no family or friends here. Do you have people in real life that can support you?

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  12. #37
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    Can I suggest you contact Karinya House in Canberra?

    I know it's not Sydney and I don't know what your work etc circumstances are but the it's one of the charities I support because it supports women with difficult circumstances in pregnancy. It originally began to provide residential care to women who had nowhere else to go when they found themselves pregnant but it's now much more than that and provides outreach services as well. Perhaps they may know who you could contact in Sydney or what services are available to assist you.

    The website address is http://www.karinyahouse.asn.au/ . If lack of support is your main issue, this may be your answer.

    I hope all goes well for you.

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  14. #38
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    Big big big big HUGS to you xxx
    I can only say what i believe, and that is that a baby doesn't need much in this world, all it needs is a mother's love and tender care. For you to be there for it and cherish it, it will thrive no matter what. Do what you think is right in your heart...

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    KaraB  (18-11-2013)

  16. #39
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    Thinking of you OP. I hope everything is ok with you

  17. #40
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    Thank you everyone for your kind words, advice, and experiences.. I appreciate them all, and you each gave me something to think about..
    My appointment was rescheduled by the clinic to Friday morning, because the anaesthesiologist would not allow me to leave with no-one to pick me up..
    Ever since I've had this appointment, each time it has had to be rescheduled... Now I'm currently getting over a cold and congestion and worry I'll need to reschedule again, because I'm not sure if I can get GA in this circumstance?
    The further along I get.. The more reluctant I am...
    In my heart- I do not want to do this.
    But my head is telling me that at this point in time, it's the only logical thing to do. I've weighed everything up.. Over and over.. It's all I have been thinking of.. I may have a change of heart tomorrow.. I may go through with it and regret it all.. My heart will be broken, but hopefully the logic will make me ok..
    The person whom I rent my bedroom from asked me to take her mail in for her today (she's in the hospital).. And I got lost and ended up in antenatal.. and I thought to myself.. If I'm too unwell to get it done tomorrow, then I just won't get it done at all..

    I still don't feel pregnant.. But as I said, maybe that makes it easier.. I just wish this had happened 12 months from now

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