I just asked my DH his opinion on this.
He said he would be ok with it if I chose to harvest his sperm, but what would the ramifications of the child born of this be?
Anyway, id probably do it. I love my DH and would want to have another part of him live on.
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I think there's a difference between already having sperm / embryos frozen and using those after the father has dies, and actively taking sperm from them while they are on life support. If we were already going through ivf for instance and had embryos in storage then I can imagine wanting to use them, as obviously that is something we would have planned to do (not sure that I personally would do it, I'd have to really think through the realities of raising a child on my own who will never know their father, but I can see how someone might).
Taking sperm from someone who is unable to give their consent however is a totally different thing and I could never do that. At that stage I don't think it matters that you might have planned kids together 'one day', as another pp said I would see that door as being closed.
Yes already have discussed it
For me personally if I wasn't already ttc with the deceased no I wouldn't do it.
If we were actively ttc yes I would if I still felt that way after dealing with my grief
My dad died when I was a baby so I understand what it's like to grow up without a father. My DH and I also spent 3 years ttc before we were blessed with our baby. I'm now utd again. If he'd died when we were ttc, yes I would have wanted to harvest sperm. Nowadays, probably not because we already have a child and another on the way.
It's a very personal issue, obviously. In an ideal world, couples would discuss it and make arrangements for it (if they wanted to go ahead with it), perhaps as a clause in a will or something like that.
The only case I've heard on this was a couple who had put a sample at a clinic and she had to go to court to get approval to use it after he died. I'm not sure what procedure you would have to use to get a sample from a dead person. Maybe if they were alive but in a coma/bad way you could retrieve some via a needle. But I'd actually talk to a fertility specialist if it really was a top priority if ur partner died. Would hate for some nasty suprises in a time of tradgedy.
We already have DHs sperm frozen (not in case he dies! But because we're having IUI while he is interstate). And I'm fairly certain there was a disclaimer in the paperwork that stated he gives permission for me to use his sperm until he withdraws consent or passes away.
We've briefly talked about it, and we'd do it. We have one child and been trying for another for 3 years. If DH was to die, I'd want our child to have a sibling.
But my wife can have mine if she wants
Dave The Turning Cowboy
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