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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Given his history of cheating, and the fact it all started with text messages I would be suspicious. I doubt it's a case of knowing each other from way back and just running into each other. Why do they have each other's numbers? and 'talk soon' tells me they are involved in ongoing contact.

    When these sort of threads come up I'm loathed to say he's cheating, bc we can't know for sure. if I were you, I wouldn't say anything yet, and monitor his phone and internet. IME if you confront a cheater before you have evidence they just deny and then become more careful. If it is innocent, he's going to be angry you don't trust him. If it were me, I'd bide my time. If there's nothing untoward that will show itself. If there is something going on, you can gather evidence so he can't weasle out of it.
    I change my answer I agree with all of this

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  3. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by sunnyflower View Post
    And I don't think spending or not spending time together makes a man fall into bed with another woman....
    DH looks for emotional relationship elsewhere if he doesnt get it from me. He has told me the reason why he cheated "because i dont feel you want me anymore...i like to feel wanted". I did take our relationship for granted.

  4. #13
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    Female - You call that a catch up?!?! speak soon.
    That sounds suss IMO.

    I would ask him.

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  6. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beefie View Post
    DH looks for emotional relationship elsewhere if he doesnt get it from me. He has told me the reason why he cheated "because i dont feel you want me anymore...i like to feel wanted". I did take our relationship for granted.
    I think that's a crock! Completely unjustified excuse IMO!
    Aside from the cheating has he been the epitome of an ideal husband?? If not his excuse for cheating has no foundations!
    Seems like he plucked that one out if thin air, you don't seek out someone else if times get hard. Full stop.

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  8. #15
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    At first thought I was thinking that they bumped into each other too.

    Hopefully it was just an innocent encounter, but I can understand why you would be feeling ill over it.

  9. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beefie View Post
    DH looks for emotional relationship elsewhere if he doesnt get it from me. He has told me the reason why he cheated "because i dont feel you want me anymore...i like to feel wanted". I did take our relationship for granted.
    I'm sure I will p!ss people off with this response 😒 BUT BS..... your DH needs to take some responsibility for his actions ( in the past )

    Saying he cheated because he doesn't feel wanted by you anymore? Way to pass the buck champ. I'm sorry but what a ridiculous excuse. But apparently you find it plausible if you believe that yes you did take your relationship for granted.

    I hope he's learnt his lesson from past mistakes & there's an innocent explanation.

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  11. #17
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    I like how whenever i see these threads there are always people saying snoop, Do you really think that is a trusting relationship????
    Just ask him, geez if he has cheated again, it more the lies than the act that is the betrayal

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  13. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beefie View Post
    DH looks for emotional relationship elsewhere if he doesnt get it from me. He has told me the reason why he cheated "because i dont feel you want me anymore...i like to feel wanted". I did take our relationship for granted.
    That's no excuse on his part. You weren't out cheating you were working. Thousands of couples work through times where they feel unappreciated, ignored, have lost the spark and don't cheat. They discuss things and either on their own, or through a counsellor find a way to work through their issues.

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  15. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Calstar View Post
    I think that's a crock! Completely unjustified excuse IMO!
    Aside from the cheating has he been the epitome of an ideal husband?? If not his excuse for cheating has no foundations!
    Seems like he plucked that one out if thin air, you don't seek out someone else if times get hard. Full stop.
    i dont really want to get into his reasons or excuses. H is a wonderful hands on dad, a good hardworking supportive husband. We just went through a bad patch about 10yrs ago. I honestly never thougght id have to worry about that stuff ever again. I cant believe im even second guessing him. I still have his letter he wrote to me explaining everything when it happened for a 2nd time. I re-read it just now to make myself feel a bit better. He was so angy with himself and beat himself up pretty bad over it all. - As he should have! i just dont see him doing it again....we have kids now and he knows whats going to happen if he breaks my trust ever again.

  16. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoseBetweenTheThorns View Post
    I like how whenever i see these threads there are always people saying snoop, Do you really think that is a trusting relationship????
    Just ask him, geez if he has cheated again, it more the lies than the act that is the betrayal
    As someone that has been with a serial cheater, I know most will deny until they have the evidence in front of them. The OP doesn't have to follow my advice.

    I also see threads where a guy is pretty clearly cheating, people tell her oh just talk to him, don't snoop. She does, he denies.... then 6 months down the track she starts a thread saying she found out he was cheating all along.

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