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  1. #121
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    The problem arises when you don't offer choices in the first place. Offering toys based on stereotypes is the issue. Just let them pick any toy they want. My DDs have toy cars, remote control helicopters, dolls, Thomas toys, Dora stuff....the moment you limit their choices, that's when it becomes a problem I think.

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  3. #122
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clarabelle View Post
    Yes I am for real. I'm flabbergasted that some of you seem to think that many boys prefer girls toys over what is typically marketed for boys, and vice versa. Sorry, it's just not so. Hasn't anyone noticed that men and women are different? Well so are boys and girls. As I said before, I don't care if a boy (or a girl) wants to play with a toy made for the opposite gender, I just don't think the majority play that way. Sure, I played armies and ran around with boys too when I was a kid, and that is natural normal play. But, I preferred girls toys, and so do my girls, and my boys prefer boys toys and activities. I have 5 kids, and have seen a lot over the last 14 years. I'm not criticizing anyone, I just don't think what some are trying to make a point over here, is valid. I spent a fair bit of observational time in kindergarten and prep too, and what some are saying here, just wasn't what I saw.
    Id say that by the time a child gets to kinder or prep that gender stereotypes are already present and that's a reason they choose gender marketed toys.

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  5. #123
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clarabelle View Post
    Hasn't anyone noticed that men and women are different?
    Yes, men and women are different. The majority of women and the majority of men may choose a certain colour/toy/career choice, etc. But that doesn't mean that we offer toys/colour coded things/ steer them towards everything based on majority views or stereotypes. That's the easiest thing to do.

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  7. #124
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    I haven't read through the thread yet, but I was the biggest tom boy growing up. Loved playing with cars, Lego, slot cars, game consoles and had a BMX with stunt pegs (I was waaaayyy cool!). I hated barbies and girly toys. But I grew up just fine. I'm very girly now, always wearing dresses and makeup. Let kids play with whatever they want I say.

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  9. #125
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    My son has a stroller that he loves. He never liked or played with dolls. He gets his cars and puts them in the stroller and pushes it everywhere. If he liked dolls, I would have no hesitation to get him one

  10. #126
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    Clarabelle....you don't think that is a result of social conditioning? (however unintentional)

    I have one of each, and from day dot they have been exposed to gender stereotypes. My daughter got a mountain of pink dolls and household type toys for her first birthday. My son got cars and trucks. Is it because they liked or gravitated towards those things? No, it is because as a general rule people buy toys marketed at specific genders. This has to have an impact on their choices of what they play with.

    I buy a range of things for my kids to play with and really try and avoid any gender stereotyping but the external influences are there. For the first time ever my son said the other day he did not want the pink cup because it is a girl colour. Does he really not like pink or is he just saying that because an older kid said it to him...I'm pretty sure it is the latter.

    My daughter plays with her older brothers toys, at the moment her wanting to copy him is stronger than her being socially conditioned to `girl' toys (I am sure the washing machine my MIL is buying her for Christmas will help her along the way ).

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  12. #127
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clarabelle View Post
    Yes I am for real. I'm flabbergasted that some of you seem to think that many boys prefer girls toys over what is typically marketed for boys, and vice versa. Sorry, it's just not so. Hasn't anyone noticed that men and women are different? Well so are boys and girls. As I said before, I don't care if a boy (or a girl) wants to play with a toy made for the opposite gender, I just don't think the majority play that way. Sure, I played armies and ran around with boys too when I was a kid, and that is natural normal play. But, I preferred girls toys, and so do my girls, and my boys prefer boys toys and activities. I have 5 kids, and have seen a lot over the last 14 years. I'm not criticizing anyone, I just don't think what some are trying to make a point over here, is valid. I spent a fair bit of observational time in kindergarten and prep too, and what some are saying here, just wasn't what I saw.
    I think you will find if you research that the differences between boys and girls are physical (penis and vagina) and hormonal.

    There are a great many peer reviewed widely accepted studies that show that boys and girls when born are very similar more so then different and are greatly effected by the views, values, ideals and prejudices of those around them.

    Gender is socially constructed, sex is not.

    Many years ago it was thought women were not able to be intellectuals and they shouldn't even learn how to read and write, however now we know better.

    There may be many girls who prefer dolls over say trucks and cars, however many of those could do so due to gender stereotyping and societal forces. If left to their own devices and truly given free choice I believe both girls and boys would enjoy a mixture of everything. Yes some would heavily favour certain toys, however t hats not down to gender.

    There was a study I was reading recently that showed that most women felt men were better at maths as did men, however when put into groups if women and men were showed studies of how capable at maths women were etc then they performed just as well as men. And enjoyed it just as much.

    Gender stereotyping sucks. It limits people, inhibits them, it's sexist and archaic.

    Im glad my children feel free (mostly as there is still wide spread societal pressure) to be who they are.

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  14. #128
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    I want to buy my 1yo a doll for Christmas.

    I feel I missed the window for my 5yo, and he hates dolls/anything pink etc. One day he went through a large box of soft toys, found anything pink or doll like, tossed it in the hallway and told me to throw it in the bin.

    My boys play so roughly, and I would really like to encourage their caring, nurturing side a bit, which I think a doll might do.

    Given that boys may become fathers one day, it seems like a good idea to promote that.

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  16. #129
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    Quote Originally Posted by MsMummy View Post
    I want to buy my 1yo a doll for Christmas.

    I feel I missed the window for my 5yo, and he hates dolls/anything pink etc. One day he went through a large box of soft toys, found anything pink or doll like, tossed it in the hallway and told me to throw it in the bin.

    My boys play so roughly, and I would really like to encourage their caring, nurturing side a bit, which I think a doll might do.

    Given that boys may become fathers one day, it seems like a good idea to promote that.
    Both my DS AND my DD use dollies as wrestling buddies *sigh* there is so little nurturing play in this house. Can it be bashed or thrown or raced? No? Not interested!

  17. #130
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    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    Both my DS AND my DD use dollies as wrestling buddies *sigh* there is so little nurturing play in this house. Can it be bashed or thrown or raced? No? Not interested!
    Given my boys would probably do similar, I might be buying a budget doll, rather than a cabbage patch doll.

    I still have some of my cabbage doll clothes from childhood) but not the doll, so I had visions of reliving my own childhood by dressing it up with my kids. Not to be, it appears.


 

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