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  1. #21
    threechooks's Avatar
    threechooks is offline If my spelling annoys you that's your problem.... I have better things to do than proofread !
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    I understand your discomfort. Are you able to lock a room or cupboard? You can put personal papers and items away, so she can't snoop.

  2. #22
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    Please don't miss out on a great night with your partner. I do get what you're saying. My ex-sil completely rearranged my kitchen cupboards whilst I was out for 3 hours. I came back to a completely different kitchen. P**sed me off but I realised it was her issue not mine. [What normal person does that?]. Take your personal toys , undies and bills and put them somewhere out of reach (ie your car, garden shed). The rest you can undo the next day. In a year or so you may pay for a babysitter who will do exactly the same thing. Don't let the small stuff distract you from a rare night out.

  3. #23
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    FearlessLeader is offline Winner 2013 - Most Memorable Thread
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    I think it's a bit unfair for your husband to miss out on a night with you because you don't like your MIL looking at your linen. if my DH declared that he didn't want my mum in the house alone and that was the reason we weren't going out, there would be some fairly major shouty words spoken.

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  5. #24
    rainbow road's Avatar
    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    I think it's really weird that you have such an issue with it honestly! Sorry!

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  7. #25
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    yep I find it weird too. Why should your hubby miss out on a night out? if it were the reverse situation where he won't go out instead of leaving my mum alone in our house I would be peeved to have to sit home.

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    I don't see the issue either to be honest. My MIL babysits regularly in our home and I prefer that as DD can sleep in her own cot etc.

  9. #27
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    I think you need to just try to relax. It's a bit odd you don't want her alone in your house, despite what you've said, and she is just trying to help out so you get a night off. Its normal for grandparents to do this. Just go out and enjoy yourself!

  10. #28
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    Our kids are ages 8 and 4 years. MIL has never babysat in out home for us ever, and only a handful of times at her place. That is it.

    I know it is my issue, not hers. I get that. It just makes me so uncomfortable.

    DH isn't phased either way. He will just as happily sit at home on his computer and play online games than get dressed up and go out. It was more me pushing to go out than DH, but the other side of the coin is MIL in our home when we aren't here. This will be a first for that. And it makes me nervous! Silly, I know but I just cannot help that

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    Don't get me wrong my mil annoys me too... However unless you have your secret stash of p@rno magazines hidden in the linen closet then is it really the end of the world?

    If you think your mil will cross the line into going through your *personal* stuff then do what pp said: gather your papers and toys and lock them away somewhere (shed). I would then put a couple of well placed items in the danger area (bedroom closet etc) so you will be able to tell if mil has tried to cross the line (so you know if you can trust her next time).

    I think missing out on an awesome night with hubby is taking it too far. Like cutting off your nose to spite your face.

    Good luck..

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    I think that all the pp's that don't see the issue, obviously have a mil that leaves their stuff alone!! Op I know exactly how you feel, however I do think that you need to learn to deal with it, it is totally normal for IL's to babysit at your house, and IMO it's so much easier.

    My MIL minds my kids at my house twice a week. The night before, I try and put away papers, cards, washing (she folds it and stacks it around the house, and not in any order! She also folds my underwear), and I hide any chocolate, icecream, cream. I've learnt the hard way, kid you not.

    Yet when I get home, I know I'll have to rearrange my crockery cupboard to what it was, replace my chopping board to it's proper place, fix my washing, turn my kitchen bin around the right way, and get the kids to put their shoes in their shoe rack rather than lined up against the wall.
    All while cursing and muttering about "bl00dy nanny, why does she DO that". Lol.

    It's worth the convenience of having her come to me rather than the other way around,... I swear it is!

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