+ Reply to Thread
Page 6 of 9 FirstFirst ... 45678 ... LastLast
Results 51 to 60 of 87
  1. #51
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    4,265
    Thanks
    159
    Thanked
    1,143
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I think it would definitely depend on the exact request, and how strong those beliefs were. Im quite a firm believer in "each to their own" and "Whatever works" providing the child is happy, healthy, secure, cared for, needs met etc..

    But the thought of certain practices go against every bone in my body, one in particular is making my stomach churn even now, just thinking about it, so i doubt i could carry through on it.
    If it was a preference of mine, and i was asked to do the other, well, fair enough, id probably comply unless i felt it would be detrimental to the childs health or wellbeing.

    In saying that though, id tell them upfront so they had the choice to take the offer of baby sitting, or leave it.

    But ive also felt the disapointment of someone not following through on your requests because 'their way' is easier...

  2. #52
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    1,146
    Thanks
    251
    Thanked
    371
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    To be honest.. I don't know... If it was something I really strongly disagreed with, I don't think I could do it.

    If it was something harmless, that I don't necessarily agree with, I think I would be able to bite my tongue.

    I hope that my son values my opinion when he is older & respects that I won't be able to do things I don't feel comfortable with..

  3. #53
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    19,602
    Thanks
    3,256
    Thanked
    4,044
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    I think I'd tell my child what I can and can't do and if that's not okay then I can help and be involved in different ways. If it's controlled crying then I can baby sit in the evening when baby is already been put to bed (if they're okay that if baby wakes I'm going to respond straight away) or if that won't work then I can only baby sit during play times or only help out if they're home to put baby to bed.

    The problem I've had is inlaws making it very clear that our boundaries around food would not be respected, then *****ed and moaned that we didn't leave jasper with them as a baby. They wanted it both ways - demanding to have him but didn't want to respect our wishes.

    Also, someone who's strongly opposed to cc will likely go "oh it didn't work, so I just rocked him to see if he'd fall asleep" after a few minutes of crying. Someone who's strongly in favour of cc will go "oh it didn't work, so I just put him in his cot to see if he'd fall asleep" after a few minutes of rocking. So I'd prefer to leave my babies with someone who is either neutral on topics I'm passionate about or on the same page.

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  4. #54
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    NSW
    Posts
    1,548
    Thanks
    323
    Thanked
    713
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I think that there does have to be give and take. This seems to be a similar vein to one of my threads. My mother goes above and beyond and I know that is a rare and amazing thing but I don't expect it of her. I don't expect her to baby wear like I do or spend all of DD's naps on the couch with DD sleeping on her like I do. DD doesn't have a strict routine. I don't expect her to come to my house and am constantly offering to buy change tables and the like for her house if she wants to have DD there. And I don't much care if she watches telly all day with her though I make a point of doing a variety of things. When I ask her about all these things she says "its what is best for bub right now". There are some things that parents absolutely should be flexible on (not saying that they are the same things for everyone).

    But when it comes to things that are very important to the parents, I hope that I can trust and respect DD enough as a parent (when she grows) to stick to the things that she holds dear to her parenting methods. For me that is not leaving DD to cry and giving her the best nutrition I can. I cant trust MIL on those things right now hence I don't want her babysitting.

    Compromise is the key to everything but if, as a grandparent I cant meet them in their request (CC as the prime example), I cant really expect to be chosen as the chief babysitter.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to Tildy For This Useful Post:

    Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (31-10-2013)

  6. #55
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    4,589
    Thanks
    1,302
    Thanked
    2,569
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I will be happy to follow the rules of my children while I babysit except if they smack or CC or CIO. They go against everything I believe and I would hope my children are in tune enough with their children not to do them.

  7. #56
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    New South Wales
    Posts
    1,060
    Thanks
    168
    Thanked
    186
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I'm another one who would follow their rules except for CC/CIO and smacking. A previous poster mentioned that non-CC, attachment based parenting is "in vogue" at the moment... Well, I hate to be the one to break this to you but it's been "in vogue" since the beginning of time. It's CC that is the modern, western phenomenon, not attachment parenting.

    Listening to a baby scream and not responding goes against all my instincts as a mother so I don't do it and wouldn't do it with my grandchild.

    ETA: I let my mum and in-laws do what they want with DD in terms of food etc. They respect my parenting style and work with that 😊
    Last edited by FutureMa; 31-10-2013 at 07:46.

  8. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to FutureMa For This Useful Post:

    BornToBe  (31-10-2013),Mulva  (31-10-2013)

  9. #57
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    2,860
    Thanks
    1,248
    Thanked
    1,444
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    So true - CIO and CC are the new things on the block, not AP related stuff!

    Look, it makes me a hypocrite but I couldn't do it. Physically, I couldn't listen to my grandkid cry alone, or sit them in front of the TV for the entire day without interacting with them, or offer them junk food instead of meals. I couldn't do it, and I'd frankly be worried about them if that was their normal, day to day life.

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to BornToBe For This Useful Post:

    Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (31-10-2013)

  11. #58
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    2,877
    Thanks
    349
    Thanked
    1,434
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I haven't read all the other posts but to answer the original question I don't know. I have my ways of parenting but when my Mum or MIL (when she was alive and we still spoke) babysat for me I was pretty open minded with letting them do what they felt was right and in turn if they weren't sure if I would approve of something they would ring me beforehand and ask so I hope to have the same relationship with my children when I babysit their children

  12. #59
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Posts
    3,587
    Thanks
    132
    Thanked
    1,601
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I did cc with both my kids and they are fine, no issues what so ever..i firmly believe in it and if my children do it with their kids they have my support.
    whatever my kids decide to do with their children is their business and I will support them and when I am asked to babysit I will do the same as children thrive on routine.

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to Louise41 For This Useful Post:

    Little Miss Sunshine  (31-10-2013)

  14. #60
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    on a sandy beach!
    Posts
    6,329
    Thanks
    336
    Thanked
    2,197
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I don't care about junk, cc etc but my mil fed my dd GRAVY & tim tams at 4 months... There is an age limit!!!!!

    I only request dd got burped properly due to reflux and wind and nobody followed through so we don't let them baby sit well didn't when young


 
+ Reply to Thread
Page 6 of 9 FirstFirst ... 45678 ... LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Spin off - Preventing child abuse.
    By duckduckgoose in forum Child Welfare Concerns
    Replies: 21
    Last Post: 06-10-2013, 20:46
  2. Spin off - who has taken their child to a Chiro?
    By BigRedV in forum General Child Health Issues
    Replies: 36
    Last Post: 30-09-2013, 10:47
  3. 38+ pregnant and asked to babysit?
    By Offshorewife in forum Issues with Family Members
    Replies: 37
    Last Post: 06-02-2013, 13:16

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Boody Organic Bamboo Baby Wear
Softer than your bub's bum Boody Organic Bamboo Baby Wear
Australia's favourite eco brand has delivered a gorgeous baby collection. Made from organic bamboo, Boody's extraordinarily soft and stretchy, skin-friendly tops, bottoms, onesies, bibs and wraps don't 'cost the earth'. Get 20% OFF! Code BUBHUB16.
sales & new stuffsee all
Wendys Music School Melbourne
Wondering about Music Lessons? FREE 30 minute ASSESSMENT. Find out if your child is ready! Piano from age 3 years & Guitar, Singing, Drums, Violin from age 5. Lessons available for all ages. 35+ years experience. Structured program.
Use referral 'bubhub' when booking
featured supporter
Baby Monitors
Looking to buy a baby monitor? :: Read viewer reviews of baby monitors BEFORE you buy :: Buy at a local or online Baby Nursery Shop
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!