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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by ck2b View Post
    I have tried extremely hard to write this post in an non-antagonistic , PC , BH friendly, way. Please don't turn try and turn the tone of this thread. We are a family of 5 which is considered large. Please tell me how you wish to write the above statement so no offense is taken and I will edit it.

    ETA: I am not saying a family of 5 is large only that it is larger then the Australian average.
    Take it out completely, IMO It is unnecessary and offensive. The tone was set by your OP.

    What does it matter how many children the family already has?

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    Lalasmooch  (19-10-2013)

  3. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by SpecialPatrolGroup View Post
    OP, Further to this - define "provide"?
    Are we talking about food and a roof, or are we talking about extra curicular activities and and every child gets their own bedroom?
    Food, roof, bills, health, clothes, the childrens physical and mental health not being impacted by the financial position of the parents. What does everyone consider provide? I am trying here guys...work with me.

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    Patience Belmont  (19-10-2013)

  5. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by anewme View Post
    Take it out completely, IMO It is unnecessary and offensive. The tone was set by your OP.

    What does it matter how many children the family already has?

    ok. its removed.

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    LoveLivesHere  (19-10-2013)

  7. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by ck2b View Post
    Food, roof, bills, health, clothes, the childrens physical and mental health not being impacted by the financial position of the parents. What does everyone consider provide? I am trying here guys...work with me.
    There is nothing wrong with your original post op some people are just a bit precious

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    #Mama  (23-10-2013),cassieh  (19-10-2013),CleverClogs  (19-10-2013),Kellbell85  (23-10-2013),Night Owl  (19-10-2013),Pumpkin1106  (23-10-2013),Spotdog  (19-10-2013),Tazzy  (20-10-2013),Theboys&me  (19-10-2013),VicPark  (19-10-2013)

  9. #25
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    Thanks . For the peace and quite of BH I removed it anyway.

  10. #26
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    I'm just wondering, for those who said no:

    Are you only talking about situations where the pregnancy was intentional?

    Or would you also include situations where contraception has failed or a woman has been sexually assaulted, resulting in pregnancy? ie. do you believe they should choose to terminate or put the baby up for adoption if they can't provide for them?


    ETA: I always remember Cate Bolt's story. She's been through a lot, but was still able to provide for their 9 children. In the global financial crisis, she and her husband lost everything and ended up homeless. Despite having 4 strokes and other medical issues, she is now doing great things (she set up an orphanage overseas) and so are her children (two of her children set up a website raising $30,000 for conservation and humanitarian projects).

    If Today Tonight had done a story on her while they were homeless, I'm sure a lot of people would have judged them for having so many children. However, before that happened she could provide for them (and now that they're back on their feet, she can provide for them). So the reliance on welfare was only temporary.
    Last edited by 1234Guest; 19-10-2013 at 12:01.

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  12. #27
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    Benefits is hardly a luxury lifestyle. If someone can survive on it alone, and feed their kids, clothe them, then I take my hat off to them.

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  14. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by anewme View Post
    Take it out completely, IMO It is unnecessary and offensive. The tone was set by your OP.

    What does it matter how many children the family already has?
    Geez, op is not trying to offend anyone with (define large families on welfare) she simply poses a question. 99% of readers get this point it's not offensive or mean or trying to single anyone out. Its just asking based on individual circumstances. It doesnt matter how many kids a family has or what is classed as a big family or what welfare payments you receive its just a discussion. If anyone for that matter can have multiple kids and rely on centrelink to feed them, cloth them, and shelter them and sleep at night and be happy about it more power to you. Other families keep to a minimum size and still get by just fine. Others work their asses off to provide their ideal lifestyle for the children they choose to have.

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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  16. #29
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    This is one thing I struggle with. I only have one child but we will always have to rely on benefits. This is not a choice, but reality. DH is disabled so the chances of him getting a job that would see him getting off DSP are next to zero. I'm currently working but still getting partial payment of newstart. Even when I finish my studies in 4 years time and I get a full time job there will still be a reliance on benefits. So when exactly is it ok for me to have another child (if I'm able to due to my issues) by the standards outline here? I don't want a big family. I used to want 3 or 4. Now I would be happy if I could have one more. Over the years I have had so many people say I shouldn't be TTC until we're no long depending on welfare so according to them I should never have another child. Whether that "one more child" is a second or a 5th, why should people feel they have a say in it at all.

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  18. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by ck2b View Post
    Well isint that that kind of the point? I cant afford 4 children. 3 yes not 4. Some people can afford 7 not 8 some. How many you already have is kind of significant isint it???
    Is it?

    Why?

    Why is someone that can only afford one having No 2 ok but the person who can afford 7 having 8, worthy of all this?

    AS someone who has 6 kids and lives of a single low income it really does matter to me.

    The nasty comments you get because you have a large family is bad enough. You just have to read through the large family section on here to see that. People can be really rude.

    I honestly cant see why it is different both families are having a child they can't afford.


 

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