Have you thought about journaling to get some if your grief and sadness out?
There is no right or wrong way to do it. No fancy paper or pens needed. Just some paper and a pen and a comfy spot.
I have started to journal write and I have been amazed at some of the things I am discovering about myself. I allocate 10 minutes to write. Sometimes I start with a single word, sometimes a thought or feeling.
I do not show anyone my writings but I do discuss them with my husband or psychologist if something big comes from it. I am finding it very healing. I don't have a special book, in fact it's generally scraps of paper that I use.
I'm sorry your experience was not pleasant or what you hoped for. Your grief and feelings of loss are genuine and I'm shocked that the psychologists you have seen have not validated your feelings. I'd be angry, upset and overwhelmed too.
Good luck. I hope you find something helpful to help ease your emotions.
I've heard of Miracle Babies (for premies) is that an option for support for you where you are?