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  1. #1
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    Default She is 4 and still screams when its bedtime

    It all started when she was around 2 where she would fall asleep while having her night time cuddle with mummy, them mum would put her to bed. That routine got stuck and she will not go to bed on her good will. We have just been trying recently to send her to bed before she falls asleep on the couch but it seems like she sees it like a punishment for not going to sleep on the couch.

    She kicks up a HUGE fuss after we say it and when we carry her to bed and kiss her goodnight she will stay there for a minute or 2 but she is screaming the whole time and walks out to the lounge demanding to sleep on the couch.

    We cant go out at night cause of this and it is impacting on our social life. Really need to get her to bed before she starts kindy at least.

    Oh one more thing, 95% of the time she wakes up during the night and plants herself in our bed and dad is forced to sleep in her bed as she will carry on as above if we try and put her to her bed.

    Thanks for reading
    Last edited by Macca96; 07-10-2013 at 20:23.

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    Breaking a habit/routine that has been going on for half of your child's life won't be an easy or quick journey but she'll definitely get there if you and your partner are committed and consistent.

    What is her bedtime routine now? My kids (23months, 5 and 8) have dinner, bath, story, cuddle/chat then sleep. my 8 year old can read until 7.30pm but the younger two are in bed by 6.30/7pm.

    Reward/sticker charts can help but really it's about making a plan and sticking to it - this may mean walking her back to bed again and again and again and again but imo being firm but gentle and consistent will reap rewards.

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    Zombie_eyes is offline Formerly Diamondeyes
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    ^agree.

    Routine and be consistent. Get your dh to take her back to bed when she comes in "its time for sleep in your own bed" and nothing else (arguing with her will just keep her more alert)

    He may have to do this several times a night for days or even weeks but she will learn that its pointless coming into.

    Rough gig. You can do it!!


    Mumma to two beautiful boys on the spectrum and one special little girl.

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    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    Are you staying with her or putting her down and going out of the room? My dd is almost 4 and still needs me to stay with her so i pat and sing to her for a bit to ease her into sleep. I have been working on spending less and less time doing this.

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    Will she sleep in her bed if you lay down with her so at least you don't risk waking her up when you carry her to bed? After that you can gradually move to story cuddle then leaving her to fall asleep on her own.
    We still lay down with our 4yo dd and on a handful of occasions she has fallen asleep on her own. Most nights she does wake and ends up with dh though.

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    I agree with PP's, I would be lying down with her in her own bed and then gradually decreasing how long you stay there. Same with during the night, go and lie in her bed for a little while.

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    Hmm i think its the whole "her" bed saga. What I mean is she doesnt like going to "her" bed but if we put her to bed in our bed she seems to be fine but we cant go doing that every night.

    Yes a routine every night is what we need to establish. Having tea every night is not easy with her either as she is still a fussy eater (wont sit down and eat what we eat like meat, vegies, something else we gotta work on). Bath after say... 7.00 everynight might work as her bath is anytime during the day when we got time atm.

    So im thinking tea, then bath after her shows on tv are finished, milk, cuddle then bed.

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    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    Have you tried finding a way to make her more interested in her bed like letting her choose some new pretty sheets or a new cushion or a picture for over her bed?

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    A reward chart along with the routine would be really useful. Think about what your goal is and then the smallest part of that which she can do and offer a sticker reward for that. For example, if your goal is for her to go to bed calmly and stay in her bed all night, that is a huge goal that she is not going to be able to do in one step. The first step might be to go to bed calmly with you there the whole time. Tell her exactly what this means and then give a sticker reward when she is able to do so. Then, when she is able to do that consistently only offer the reward for the next step - go to bed calmly by yourself. The thing about rewards is that they only work when the child receives the reward early on, so make sure she can achieve what you are asking.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Macca96 View Post
    Hmm i think its the whole "her" bed saga. What I mean is she doesnt like going to "her" bed but if we put her to bed in our bed she seems to be fine but we cant go doing that every night.

    Yes a routine every night is what we need to establish. Having tea every night is not easy with her either as she is still a fussy eater (wont sit down and eat what we eat like meat, vegies, something else we gotta work on). Bath after say... 7.00 everynight might work as her bath is anytime during the day when we got time atm.

    So im thinking tea, then bath after her shows on tv are finished, milk, cuddle then bed.
    What does her day look like? When does she wake? What does she have for breakfast, snacks etc..


 

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