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  1. #1
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    Default has raising a baby changed in 18 years ???

    I think raising a baby 18 years ago has changed.....

    background : DS born in 1995- 6lbs 2oz @ 40 weeks/ DD born 1997-5lbs 15 oz @ 34 weeks..both stayed in hospital 7 days and came home with me..

    my kids slept in their own rooms from day 1 from hospital, even dd who was 6 weeks early went straight into her own room.my kids never ever slept in my room or my bed

    i didnt wrap/swaddle my 2.. didnt know i had to back then.. DD slept on her belly most of the time as it was her fav position...even as young as 7 days she was on her belly in the bassinette in her room often with door closed due to a very eager DS 2.5 who loved to wake her up

    i did controlled crying from 6 months of age, and they stopped bottles in the night- if they woke they resettled themselves or id go in and do what was needed but never spoke, turned on a light, changed a nappy unless poopy and never offered a bottle

    they were never breast fed- DS had GORD and paed said he needed more that i could offer so at 7 days of age he was bottle fed.. DD breastfed for 2 days and i hated it so she went on the bottle as well.. both my kids were bottle fed 3-4 hourly, not on demand..nop

    solids were introduced at 6 months and by 8 months they were having the same dinner as we were having just mashed more..formula stopped at 11 .5 months and straight onto cows milk.


    so does all that mean i was a bad mum or times were different back then?

    I have seen so much on BH about babies co - sleeping ( never even heard of that 18 yrs ago), wrapped, BLW - however that works- controlled crying is a big no no, kids are breastfed until some are 2+, parents seem to be more concerned about things than i was when my 2 were babies ..


    im very interested to know if raising babies has changed in the last 18 years?

    i know there are alot more "gadgets" out there for babies now than back when my 2 were born...


    please dont think im trying to be negative about how babies are raised now, im just very interested as to how things have changed over the years

  2. #2
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    I don't know if things have changed or if it is more acceptable to do some things - co sleeping would be a good example, perhaps it isn't a hidden thing anymore. I do think there has been a big sway back to breast feeding though.

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    I had my first baby 20 yrs ago too, then 13 yr gap. So much had changed.

    It didn't make me a bad mum.

    Recommendations change on everything all the time. I personally prefer to read a lot and make an informed decision. That doesn't mean I was neglectful or mean, just as people 70 yrs ago didn't think smoking was harmful, but we now know different.

    Personally I think breast is best if you can do it, and controlled crying is very harmful. That's just how I feel after oodles of research about how these things effect the brain.

    Good luck with everything, I'm sure you will be a great mum because you care.
    Last edited by sockstealingpoltergeist; 18-09-2013 at 23:55.

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    Co-sleeping (Same bed or room) is more natural and common in developing countries however around the 1950's (I could be wrong with exact era) western parenting styles changed and children sleeping in bed or the room with the parent was a big 'no,no'. Even holding the baby was not the in thing.
    My parents hardly had me in their room or bed and my father inlaw often accuses me of holding my 1yr old too long.
    I think it's our upbringing and what we were taught.

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    thanks ladies
    its all very interesting

    my ds is 18 and my dd is 16..no more kids for me as had hysterectomy at 32..

    Its amazing how things have changed ...

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    Yes, and it'll continue to change with each new generation. Doesn't mean one way is 'right' a lot of the time. Sometimes we come up with safer ways to do things as more research is done ie. SIDS and 'back to sleep' but many other things- such as different ways of settling bub really have no 'right' way- what works for one may not for another and vice versa.

    I think too with the advances in technology over the last 10-15 years we are exposed to so many more ways of doing things, whereas during most of the 90s you'd have been getting most of your child- raising information from friends, family and books. These days a google search can give you hundreds if different opinions on whatever it is you want to know about- which can be a good thing, but often serves to make us more confused and question whether what we're doing is the 'right' thing.

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    I think things have changed in 4 years, lol. I was talking to a friends who just had her second child the first is 4 years old and we were laughing how her maternal nurse was telling her how she was doing everything wrong that things have changed. Her first has made it to 4 so I think she knows what she is doing even if it's not by the "book".

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    yes i am SO glad i didnt have google 18 years ago. lol i think i would have been a wreck

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by crankyoldcow View Post
    I don't know that things changed that much??? It may have been your parenting style??

    I mainly just worked things out for myself though / followed mums lead.

    DS was also born in 1997 and has just turned 16, so the same age as your DD.

    I kept him swaddled in the early days, coslept, breastfed well past his second birthday, used BLW (but wasn't familiar with the term til I came on bubhub - I have spent years on another forum and have not encountered the term there), I also used a sling.

    In the bounty bag I bought home from hospital was an pamphlet on SIDS - I still remember it - The front page said "The good news is that 499 out 500 babies will not die of SIDS". The advice was pretty much the same as it is now ie it talked about how to make up a cot - sheets at the bottom of the cot so the baby cannot wriggle down, no doona or cot bumpers, placing the baby on their back and not letting them tummy sleep. It reinforced the dangers of cigarette smoke. The one thing it didn't mention was not using second hand mattresses.

    I do admit to copping a lot flak about cosleeping though from medical professionals. I ignored as it was literally a choice between cosleeping or no sleep for anyone.

    I read about controlled crying when DS turned 2 and decided it was not for me.

    The recommendation then was to introduce solids at 4 months. By the time DDs were born a few years later the recommendation changed to 6 months, but I believe the recommendation is now swinging back to 4 months.

    ETA upon reflection, there is more choices now than there were when DS was a baby. For example there are now many more slings on the market, modern cloth nappies (I used terry cloth nappies for all 4 of mine, but did buy some MCNs when DD3 aged 9 was a baby).

    yes i think you are right..it was my parenting style, i guess i did what just worked for me at the time and didnt have the guidance of my mum..


 

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