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  1. #11
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    Honestly, I think you are being petty and an awful friend. She obviously looks up to you and values advice given as a first time mother. Don't forget when you had your first child, i'm sure you asked around for answers too.

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    Perhaps she always brings the conversation back to the children because she feels she has nothing else to talk about? I feel the same, I spend all day every day with 3 kids. For the moment I really don't have much of a life. And im ok with that. But because my life revolves around my kids, I feel like I have nothing else interesting to talk about?

    Honestly, you would probably crush her if you made out like it was a burden. Ahe obviously respects your opinion. Honestly if I can help someone, it makes me feel great that ive helped them or been able to give them worthwhile advice. The fact that its irritating you so much makes me wonder if you are subconsciously irritated at her for some other reason? Not meaning this in a nasty way, I just personally dont get being so irritated by what you have posted...

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  5. #13
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    headoverfeet is offline The truth will set you free, but first it will **** you off. -Gloria Steinem
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    I don't think it's 'pathetic' for OP to have a vent about this friend. I mean it doesn't sound like the friend contributes too much to the actual friendship. Yes you should be able to ask your friends advice etc but there is more to friendships than just that. Does she help and support you OP? Do you have fun together? Can you turn to her in good times and bad? I'm not saying this friend is an awful friend just that OP should be able to vent here.

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  8. #15
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    I can understand your frustration and need for a vent. But I honestly think she must think you have done a great job with your little one and that she really values your opinion

    I certainly wouldn't ask someone for parenting advice if I didn't truly think they had done a fantastic job raising their own children.

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    thanks for letting me vent it out on here. i think i am going to try and see what else i can get from our friendship. i might stop answering all her questions like pp said. i dont know what else we have in common because all she talks about is her child. she works and has a social life. has told me she has friends over every 2nd weekend. im a sahm and dont get out much besides to playgroup - which is great because the girls there talk about EVERTHING and i laugh and carry on Yet all we talk about is our kids. i guess im craving something more from her. i havent known her long, our dh's work together and we became friends whilst we wer pregnant. its pretty much all we have ever had in common. i dont know her outside of being a mum....if that makes sense?
    Sorry if im comming across as a awful friend. i do love that i can help her out and i feel good about it, of course! but i cant shake the thought of being used.
    Last edited by B00ts; 18-09-2013 at 15:10.

  10. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by SummerFun View Post
    I don't think it's 'pathetic' for OP to have a vent about this friend. I mean it doesn't sound like the friend contributes too much to the actual friendship. Yes you should be able to ask your friends advice etc but there is more to friendships than just that. Does she help and support you OP? Do you have fun together? Can you turn to her in good times and bad? I'm not saying this friend is an awful friend just that OP should be able to vent here.

    this is just it. i dont feel there is anything else to our friendship besides questions and answers.

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    this would be an example of a conversation between us:
    Me: Hi how are you, you look great...how's work?
    Her: Hey, im so glad you're here dd has been driving me insane all morning. She is starting to not want to have her day sleep and gets soooo cranky....does your dd still have hers?...ohhhh really?....i dont know whats going on! oh that reminds me, what undies did you buy your dd? where did you get them?...............
    Me: drained!
    her: offers me a cuppa...does your dd still drink milk? mine doesnt and i cant get her to, ive tried everything!
    Me: does she eat cheese? yoghurt? milk in cereal?
    Her: oh yeah! all the time.
    Me: drained!
    Last edited by B00ts; 18-09-2013 at 15:20.

  12. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by B00ts View Post
    this would be an example of a conversation between us:
    Me: Hi how are you, you look great...how's work?
    Her: Hey, im so glad you're here dd has been driving me insane all morning. She is starting to not want to have her day sleep and gets soooo cranky....does your dd still have hers?...ohhhh really?....i dont know whats going on! oh that reminds me, what undies did you buy your dd? where did you get them?...............
    Me: drained!
    her: offers me a cuppa...does your dd still drink milk? mine doesnt and i cant get her to, ive tried everything!
    Me: does she eat cheese? yoghurt? milk in cereal?
    Her: oh yeah! all the time.
    Me: drained!
    maybe try add a few more people to come along to your catch ups... that way you're not alone with her totally? that way there is other conversations to bounce off?

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    Quote Originally Posted by B00ts View Post
    this would be an example of a conversation between us:
    Me: Hi how are you, you look great...how's work?
    Her: Hey, im so glad you're here dd has been driving me insane all morning. She is starting to not want to have her day sleep and gets soooo cranky....does your dd still have hers?...ohhhh really?....i dont know whats going on! oh that reminds me, what undies did you buy your dd? where did you get them?...............
    Me: drained!
    her: offers me a cuppa...does your dd still drink milk? mine doesnt and i cant get her to, ive tried everything!
    Me: does she eat cheese? yoghurt? milk in cereal?
    Her: oh yeah! all the time.
    Me: drained!
    I still don't see that as terrible. I don't like talking about my kids all the time but I have friends that do. I do not see it as burden listening to them all the time. They are warm, kind-hearted people and it just happens to be the topic that they are most passionate about. I have no problem with that. There are people out there who constantly ***** and gossip. Give me a friend who talks about their kids over someone like that any day.

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