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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default having a large(ish) 3+ family and the effect on your marriage

    So as the title states, having a large (ish) family and your marriage.....

    Im thinking about so many things when considering about having #4.

    less time for each child,
    more washing,
    more mess and chaos
    also that DH is happy with our 3 already, doesnt want a 4th but hasnt ruled it out yet, think hes comfortable with what we have.

    but wondering the effects it will have on my marriage....
    less time for us a couple, wondering what it will do to our sex life etc

    So i guess i want to hear about your experiences on having that one more child, on every aspect that you didnt consider when deciding on TTC for one more,
    just dont feel complete.at.all.yet

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
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    It made no difference to us.

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to LoveLivesHere For This Useful Post:

    foreverclucky  (16-09-2013)

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I think the potential issues are less time as a couple for various reasons, not just having a needy newborn. It will be an issue when you're running 4 kids around to birthday parties on the weekends, etc. I find it hard enough to take my ds to all his parties, I can't imagine doing it for 4 kids! Don't forget after school and weekend sport as well. And late night settling issues with your kids potentially for a long while. But, really is 4 a heap worse than 3? Not necessarily as with 4 you might be even more organised or say no more often and it might be fine.

    The other issue though is the financial one. Does it mean you or your dh will have to work more & more and you'll end up seeing less & less of each other as you struggle to make ends meet. Kids get more & more expensive often as they get older and may be less willing to sharing rooms/etc ... and a 5 bedroom house is expensive.

    We wanted 4, but stopped at 2 for many reasons. We both feel 100% confident we're finished with 2 though.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to mim1 For This Useful Post:

    foreverclucky  (16-09-2013)


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