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  1. #321
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    Tiggy- very powerful, valid, relevant thoughts I know I have myself. DH and I don't have a child so I do know I definitely want that. But the thought of the exhaustion, no longer being able to do what I want, regularly crosses my mind. As does my age when then child is ten and twenty etc.

    You've had way too much happening, which normally wouldn't be going on which is a big part of how you are feeling. I for one think it's great that you are thinking about this stuff and maybe for the first time know that you will be fine if this doesn't work. Sounds like you still want to go ahead but recent craziness has given you a more realistic perspective which can only be a good thing. Just take some time to process it all xx

  2. #322
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    Tiggy, I think its totally ok to think about things and wonder if its the right decision etc. You've had a gruelling month and I think its fair to say anyone would have doubts after so many big adventures so close together. I know I wonder if I shouldn't just pack it in and call it done but then we always say well what else are we going to do? we'd be soon ready to retire when the kid was 20 so perfect timing I say

    We're always here to support you no matter what decision you come to, and I'm still on the fence about transferring two as well. We want just one more so if we're successful this would be it anyway.

  3. #323
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    Tiggy, I agree with Crystal and Kheeki. Time for a rest! Family can be exhausting. The one thing I can say is that this time next year if you are sitting there holding a little baby in your lap, it will have all been worth it. Things have a way of working out. As for the age gap, I really don't think it's an issue. For people of our parents generation, yes it would have been very rare for someone to have a child in their forties, but honestly it's not so uncommon these days. Also, a 20 year old isn't going to want you to chase them around the park. They may call at 2am for you to pick them up after a big night though!

    Crystal, I don't think that's weird at all. The twins listen to classical music, I have some baby Mozart tracks on my iTunes that I played to them even before they were born! I like your idea of the labels and tracing letters, I'm going to steal that one! I want to do everything possible for them in terms of opportunities for learning.

  4. #324
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    Thank you kind ladies, for your wisdom and feedback. I will let things settle a bit and see how I feel. It was the pool that set me off! I love swimming and I discovered an enormous Olympic size pool in our area and it was blue and serene and empty and I longed to swim laps in my own quiet world for about a week non-stop and of course I thought if I have another baby what about the pool and my own quiet world? Help! I had DS with me and the two of us bobbed about in the sun and giggled together and I chased him around the place as usual and longed for lap time. But I guess the pool isn't going anywhere. And I can get back there, right? When bubs are with DH?

    It was different when I didn't yet have a child. I wanted to be a mum so very very much and it has surpassed even my wildest most wonderful dreams. But I am also someone who likes solitude. I guess when I am twenty my kids will give me solitude! Thank you for listening and I am glad you understand xxxx

  5. #325
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    Tiggy, I think all of your concerns and worries are quite natural, but you will cope with two and two are easier than one lol. As for putting one verses two back, obviously the choice is totally yours, but for me it was such a long way to go to just have one put back if it didn't work, the clinic also recommends putting two back if your over 40 and it only increases the chances of twins by 5% but increases the chances of pregnancy by 15%. Out of 6 ladies that I know, including me, that have gone to zlin in the past 6 wks, 2 of us have twins and 4 have singeltons, we all put two back. As I said the choice is yours and you do what feels right to you, if it doesn't work with 1, would you go back for your frostie ?, and if not, how will you feel about either destroying your frostie or donating it to research? These are some pretty tough questions, but ones that you may have to face. xx

  6. #326
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    Tiggy i have the same thoughts, I am 47 and sometimes I think I am completely insane for wanting another. But I know i have wanted this for the past 5 years and am not prepared to give up on my dream just yet. This is our last chance so really hoping it works. But if it doesn't, at least i know i tried everything possible. I will have 2 put back (but that is my decision, which i know is not for everyone) i just figure as Stacey put it its too far to go to do 1 for me personally. I know that we won't be going back. If its twins i will just have to deal with it. And on the positive side at least they won't be lonely. I always wanted my children to be close in age but unfortunately that has never worked out.

  7. #327
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    Tiggy, hope you've had time to rest over the weekend and are feeling better about things You and only you know what is best for you and your family

    Hope everyone is doing great, had a busy weekend. 2 months and 5 days until I leave!!!!

  8. #328
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    Omg you mean I got to put two back ? Aaaaaahhhhhhhhhh xxxxxxxxxxxcx

  9. #329
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    Whatever your comfortable with Tiggy

    How is everyone else doing?

    How are you doing Alice? hope your all over your colds now.

    AFM I have all the flights booked and paid for, its 64 days until we leave. Getting very excited now

    Have passport interviews booked for tomorrow, and will go for all my blood tests tomorrow as well.

  10. #330
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    Tiggy of course you don't HAVE to put two back, the clinic just recommends putting two back in women over 40 and as I said it increases the pregnancy rate by 15% , up from 50% to 65%, if you only want 1 you just tell them
    hi to eoe

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to stacey10 For This Useful Post:

    Chillout71  (07-01-2015)


 

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