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    [QUOTE=FearlessLeader;7432914]I don't see it that way, maybe because in my social circle we are all on a fairly even par, so we all know how much each other earns and how much our mortgages are, etc. It's just another topic of conversation. For eg, I was talking to a friend who has been head hunted who was telling me the money she has been offered is a fair bit more than what she's on now (she gave me dollar amounts) but the work is not as interesting. She is in a similar field to my DP, so I was telling her what he earned at that level. It would seem extremely unnatural to be coy about it in those sorts of situations. Just like if one of us buys a house, it's always disclosed what it was bought for.
    I'm quite surprised people still think talking about money is distasteful. Seems a bit quaint to me.[QUOTE]

    If everyones doing the same and you're close friends then I think thats a bit different to talking socially, which when Biscotti said that, I was kinda imagining a knob at a party telling anyone who'd listen what he was worth end of the last financial year. I have a fairly mixed bunch some with mortgages some without, I wouldn't talk about money in front of a couple of friends who are doing it pretty tough.

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    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    maybe because in my social circle we are all on
    I would say that plays a part. I live in a very small community where some are wealthy and many are not - polar opposites in fact and it would be considered really, um, not necessary to talk about wealth etc.. in a social situation.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sonja View Post
    I definitely think that's part of it. My parents would have thought it "gouache".
    Gouache?

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    Australians dont like to think anybody is getting something who did less work than they did. So we dont like people who inherited wealth and havent had to work for it. Not so much people we feel worked hard or earned it through talent

    eta: I mean in general, not that I personally dislike somebody just because they have an inheritance
    Last edited by soccer mum; 07-09-2013 at 21:12.

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  6. #55
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    FearlessLeader is offline Winner 2013 - Most Memorable Thread
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    [QUOTE=babyla;7432944][QUOTE=FearlessLeader;7432914]I don't see it that way, maybe because in my social circle we are all on a fairly even par, so we all know how much each other earns and how much our mortgages are, etc. It's just another topic of conversation. For eg, I was talking to a friend who has been head hunted who was telling me the money she has been offered is a fair bit more than what she's on now (she gave me dollar amounts) but the work is not as interesting. She is in a similar field to my DP, so I was telling her what he earned at that level. It would seem extremely unnatural to be coy about it in those sorts of situations. Just like if one of us buys a house, it's always disclosed what it was bought for.
    I'm quite surprised people still think talking about money is distasteful. Seems a bit quaint to me.

    If everyones doing the same and you're close friends then I think thats a bit different to talking socially, which when Biscotti said that, I was kinda imagining a knob at a party telling anyone who'd listen what he was worth end of the last financial year. I have a fairly mixed bunch some with mortgages some without, I wouldn't talk about money in front of a couple of friends who are doing it pretty tough.
    But the knob at a party scenario I would find knobby because they were bragging loudly, not because they were talking about money. I've heard people name dropping loudly and thought 'god what a ******'; it's not the content of what they're saying but the wanky nature of it.

    And I don't get going out of your way to not discuss money with people who earn less than you- surely they would already have a fair idea of how much you earn? Do you also not tell them about any expensive purchases such as private schooling, a new car or an overseas holiday? I mean of course you wouldn't brag about these things, but if they asked what you're up to next summer, do you not tell them you're going to the south of France? I've struggled financially, I think I would have found it condescending if people went out of their way not to discuss money issues with me just because I was poor.

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    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    I haven't read the whole thread but in our little world of bubhub-ness, I think it comes down to delivery. We had one member in particular who we don't see so much now who had wealth, but also had humility and was very gracious and had done the hard yards. Another member posted a thread about how inconvenienced she was by someone in front of her having to split up their payment across 2 card at the supermarket. She was flamed. I was one of the members who flamed her. While I was in a position of having to pay for my groceries using a nearly-maxed out credit card and what little I had in my savings account, she defended herself by saying that she and her husband personally donated more than 4 times mine and my husbands combined annual income to charity each year. Despite the fact that this member was very nice and I personally did enjoy her posts, she lacked the insight that it was so very insensitive to talk about her enormous donations in the face of people who were already feeling pretty cr@ppy about their financial situations.....which apparently inconvenienced her. I'm sure none of that made sense but...well I had some wine.

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    I always discuss holidays with friends. I have absolutely not one hint of an idea as to what their income is.

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    Good idea SPG - get in with the drinking the day before the election. Why didn't I think of that, doh!

    I remember that thread.

    Quote Originally Posted by SpecialPatrolGroup View Post
    I haven't read the whole thread but in our little world of bubhub-ness, I think it comes down to delivery. We had one member in particular who we don't see so much now who had wealth, but also had humility and was very gracious and had done the hard yards. Another member posted a thread about how inconvenienced she was by someone in front of her having to split up their payment across 2 card at the supermarket. She was flamed. I was one of the members who flamed her. While I was in a position of having to pay for my groceries using a nearly-maxed out credit card and what little I had in my savings account, she defended herself by saying that she and her husband personally donated more than 4 times mine and my husbands combined annual income to charity each year. Despite the fact that this member was very nice and I personally did enjoy her posts, she lacked the insight that it was so very insensitive to talk about her enormous donations in the face of people who were already feeling pretty cr@ppy about their financial situations.....which apparently inconvenienced her. I'm sure none of that made sense but...well I had some wine.

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    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    Quote Originally Posted by babyla View Post
    Gouache?
    Maybe this..
    lacking social experience or grace; also : not tactful : crude <it would be gauche to mention the subject>. b : crudely made or done <a gauche turn of phrase>.

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    Quote Originally Posted by biscotti View Post
    No, as a rule, I don't think Australians "resent" the wealthy, but I am pretty sure the average Australian doesn't like the obnoxious Australian (wealthy or otherwise) or those Australians who feel a certain level of self entitlement or self importance merely due to wealth.

    And just an edit to add - I feel a certain distaste for anyone who feels the need to disclose their income or net worth, so if that's what you mean by "acknowledging ones own wealth or privilege", I just can't see any social situation where it would be necessary :shrug:
    I think this is kind of how I feel but then again I think it depends on how you were brought up too. My family are funny about money, it's just not something you're supposed to talk about openly with other people, we were brought up to believe that it's crass to discuss it.

    So it kind of turns me off when people draw attention to it, either way though, I'm a little embarrassed when people tell me their money problems too, just like when people feel the need to draw attention to their wealth. I figure you will notice generally anyway or at least get a sense, without someone having to keep bringing it up. Just makes me wonder why they need to keep drawing attention to it I guess.

    But just knowing someone is wealthy, or not doesn't really garner any real reaction. I don't think it's fair for people to be judged on their kids schooling of whatever, nor should they be expected to hide it, that's just weird, but I think making reference to your wealth all the time (or lack thereof) is kind of bad manners and at least to me off putting.


 
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