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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by littlebopeep2013 View Post
    She is a friend and I care about her.......in her current vunerable state I don't want to see her hurt emotionally or physically. Perhaps I could give you the name and phone number of the Police Constable I spoke to who happens to be a lady that walks in the Park all the time. Perhaps you need to have a talk with her. Your comments are very disturbing. And I will get involved as much as I can. If you want to meet a man for a relationship, IT shouldn't be in a dirty park near a toilet block....You're comments made me shudder.

    No, no, you're right. I'm pro-rape.

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  3. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by littlebopeep2013 View Post
    I never mentioned anything about rape.

    You mentioned sexual assault. That is usually rape - to some degree. It might not be penetrative forced sex, but it's still usually rape.

  4. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by SAgirl View Post
    a LOT of women get assaulted in parks etc while walkin alone...
    .
    That is completely untrue. Very very very few women get assaulted walking alone.

    OP, my advice is to mind your own business. Your friend is a grown woman. She doesn't need you telling her what to do or judging where she walks or how she meets people.

    I met my partner on a tram, I struck a conversation up with a stranger in public. Jeez, lucky I didn't get assaulted!

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  6. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by littlebopeep2013 View Post
    She is a friend and I care about her.......in her current vunerable state I don't want to see her hurt emotionally or physically. Perhaps I could give you the name and phone number of the Police Constable I spoke to who happens to be a lady that walks in the Park all the time. Perhaps you need to have a talk with her. Your comments are very disturbing. And I will get involved as much as I can. If you want to meet a man for a relationship, IT shouldn't be in a dirty park near a toilet block....You're comments made me shudder.
    Disturbing and making you shudder? I think this is one of the most bizarre posts I've ever seen

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    Quote Originally Posted by SassyMummy View Post
    You're in more danger of rape around someone you know than someone you don't. Majority of rapists rape women that are known to them.

    You wouldn't suggest women stop having friends, or stop visiting people they know, etc even though the risk of rape is higher around these people that they know... so why suggest people not walk on their own?

    I'm not going to give up my life and go into hiding on the off change some stranger decided to attack me. I think it's wrong to suggest that a woman should be doing this in order to prevent rape... since statistically, to prevent rape in Australia, you should probably just stop interacting with people altogether, since they're the ones who are most likely to rape you.
    If like to see where you get these stats? Many many women get raped by strangers!!

    It's about being in the wrong place at the wrong time a lot of the time and a park which is KNOWN for trouble should be avoided. I don't really understand how you don't seem to get this? As women we need to take reasonable responsibility for our own safety too!

    I think the OPs point is that she cares about her friend and whether or not her friend was sexually assaulted or sexually harassed is still cause for concern! Especially since the guy was following her...

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    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    That is completely untrue. Very very very few women get assaulted walking alone.

    OP, my advice is to mind your own business. Your friend is a grown woman. She doesn't need you telling her what to do or judging where she walks or how she meets people.

    I met my partner on a tram, I struck a conversation up with a stranger in public. Jeez, lucky I didn't get assaulted!
    Wow.

    On a tram is hardly the same as walking in a park on your own which is KNOWN for trouble.

    And judging?? No, there is a difference between judgement and care!

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    http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/commonmyths2.php
    common myths about rape

    Here are some of the most common myths that surround rape and sexual assault:
    Myth Do not go out alone at any time. Women are most likely to be raped outside, in dark alleyways late at night. This is the best way for a woman to protect herself.
    Fact The suggestion of avoiding walking alone, especially at night is a common suggestion to avoiding sexual assault. However, only 9% of rapes are committed by 'strangers'. Women are raped in their homes and in their work places where they are less likely to be believed and even less likely to report. This myth can control movements and restricts freedom. This can feel like women are living under a 'curfew' and that it is a woman's responsibility to be either in or out at certain times. Around 90% of rapes are committed by known men.




    Myth: The rapist is usually a stranger
    An abundance of research both overseas and in Australia has established that the majority of
    sexual assaults are perpetrated by acquaintances, dates or marital partners. The erroneous
    image of the rapist as a stranger stems in part from the fact that such rapes are more likely to
    be reported to the police (Bownes et al. 1991). However, various victim surveys show a
    different picture: in Matchett (1988), 29 per cent of callers had been sexually abused by
    their husbands; in a nation-wide victims survey in the USA only 22 per cent had been raped
    by strangers (Crime Victims Research and Treatment Center 1992, p. 4); Green (1987)
    reports that, in Australia, more than half of the victims knew or were related to the attacker;
    Bonney (1985 p. 30) looked at reported rapes in New South Wales and ascertained that
    only one-quarter involved strangers. This may be a fairly accurate figure since the national
    crime victim survey also shows that only 24 per cent of the crimes of rape or attempted rape
    were perpetrated by strangers (Walker 1993).
    Differences have been found in elements of the sexual assault and in its impact on the
    victim based upon her relationship to the perpetrator. Some of these contrasts are in part
    responsible for the relatively low reporting of 'date' rape. 'Date' or acquaintance rapes are
    more likely to involve verbal threats than either a weapon or physical injuries. The attackers
    are also more likely to threaten the victim about disclosing (Bownes et al. 1991). Low levels
    of reporting in 'date' rape are also a consequence of the victim's inability to perceive herself
    as a rape victim. Several studies have shown that people are more likely to label an act as
    rape if the survivor protested both verbally and physically early in the scenario, and if the
    male arranged the date but the female paid her own way (Shotland & Goodstein 1983;
    Muehlenhard 1989). The victim has been socialised with these fallacious concepts; even if
    she does label the act as a rape, she may be reluctant to go to the police since she might
    either believe in her own partial responsibility or believe that the police would blame her.
    Marital rape has been found to be a component in a high number of marriages that
    involve physical battering (Bowker 1983). Finkelhor (1985, p. 204) estimates that 10 to
    14 per cent of all married women have been or will be raped by their spouse. AlthoughWithout Consent: Confronting Adult Sexual Violence
    318
    marital rape involves more violence and physical injuries than acquaintance rape, the lower
    rate of reporting can be attributed to both the isolation of the battered woman and to the ongoing societal assumption that husbands are immune from sexual assault charges.
    http://www.aic.gov.au/media_library/...0/esteal4b.pdf

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    Good lord!

    Her friend is a fully grown woman, if she wants to walk through a park alone, well that's her call, not OP's.

    Sure, share your concern if you must but then you really should butt out.

    For the record I don't and wouldn't live my life on the off chance something awful might happen, something awful can happen anywhere.

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  16. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by SAgirl View Post
    If like to see where you get these stats? Many many women get raped by strangers!!
    The International Violence Against Women survey is 2002-2003, the Australian component suggests that only 1% of women surveyed (over 6000) who have been raped have been raped by a stranger. A further 2% have had an attempted rape attack by a stranger.

    Another study with over 10000 participants concluded that the absolute majority of sexual assaults of women over the age of 15 were committed by males known to them, and often within their own home.

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    Quote Originally Posted by SAgirl View Post
    I get what you are saying but honestly, this is just unrealistic!! The fact is that women get raped and a LOT of women get assaulted in parks etc while walkin alone...

    We don't live in a perfect world and never will.

    OP I personally think its good advice telling your friend to be careful etc. I wouldn't walk in parks on my own (at night) in fact I never walk anywhere alone at night, but in saying that, I'm from South Africa and you just don't do that there. As women, we NEED to look after ourselves and keep ourselves safe.
    Untrue. Most people are raped by people they know. Stranger rape is not at all common or prevalent.

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