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  1. #11
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    I'm typing one handed but agree with all of the above.Our baby behaved/s very similar to yours, he's seven weeks. Whilst most people have some idea of what is involved caring for a newborn the reality of the sheer exhaustion of it can be a rude shock for anyone. This is my second and it's still shocking to me! Lol
    Please give you and your baby some more time to adjust, everything is so new to the both of you that you need to set your expectations really low, take it one day at a time and be gentle on the both of you as you learn to adjust and get to know each other.
    Admittedly I am strongly against CC in any way shape or form but that aside logic tells me that a newborn baby doesn't have the developmental capacity to learn what it is you want him to learn yet, I believe the only thing CC could teach your baby right now is that you won't respond when they need you
    Right now we just try and roll with the punches with an attitude of acceptance and a sense of humour. Our baby enjoys white noise (quite loud!), his swing, being swaddled, his boobs (lol) , showering and bathing with us, walks in the pram, co sleeping and lots and lots of cuddles!

    Right now I enjoy sleep, coffee and other people giving me a little grace as I fumble through this time.

    It might help to identify where the frustration comes from specifically, are you missing the time to yourself, sleep, worried about the state of the house? Etc then work from there to find other ways to meet those needs while still meeting those of your wee one. Rather than trying to fight your babies need for you to accommodate yours. Both needs are equally important but for us adults its so much easier to be flexible, especially with a little support from a great partner, friends or family.

    Best of luck and a big dose of empathy, it's so very hard a d it's ok to acknowledge that xx

    Ps, for the record he is honestly getting better all the time. During the day so long as he is fed and changed more often he drifts off in his swing after being wrapped with the white noise on. In the first few weeks he would only feed or be put to sleep in our arms.
    Last edited by Mathermy; 25-08-2013 at 10:31.

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    Mags2095  (25-08-2013)

  3. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by decemberbubba View Post
    White noise can also be great to help newborns settle to sleep and sleep longer. I got DS2 a Sleep Sheep which plays white noise and ocean sounds - when it's going it helps him move into the next sleep cycle (where they will often wake and can't get themselves back to sleep).

    ETA: another thought - are you swaddling him nice and tight when you put him to sleep?
    Totally about to google a sleep sheep!

  4. #13
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    Sounds fairly normal I'm afraid. They feed a lot in the beginning to establish your supply. They have tiny little tummies and get hungry quickly. My DD fed Atleast 2 hourly around the clock till about 6 weeks when things definitely get easier.

    I found the first few weeks really really overwhelming and I'm a midwife ! My DD wasn't a baby who would just go off to sleep, even hours of pushing her in the pram still would occasionally not work. She also has a horrible screaming match most nights.

    Please do not do controlled crying, it can be damaging to a young baby. Responding to bub's needs makes them a more content and confident baby.
    If you are really wanting to get baby to sleep somewhere other than you I found putting baby in the bassinet drowsy, call
    and awake and sitting with them patting them to sleep taught bub that the bassinet was a place for sleep and that she understood what she was meant to do when I put her in it.


    My DD started sleeping 8 hour stretches at 8 weeks and within weeks slept 12 hours a night. She is a bit wobbly now with 4 month sleep regression but still generally had 4 hours of day naps and 11-12 hours at night occasionally waking once for a feed. She was such a hard baby to settle in the beginning I though we'd never get there!


    We have found gentle background music in her room helps and also swaddling and tucking a blanket over the top of bub firmly and into the sides of the mattress do baby feels secure.


    Love to dream or ergo cocoon are great for wriggly babies.


    It does get better! I've been where you have.

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    Mags2095  (25-08-2013)

  6. #14
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    Thanks everyone for your replies.
    This makes me feel better, to see that so many new mums have been where I am now. I didn't think it was going to be that hard... very naive of me!

    I have been told: just do whatever you can to get through those first few weeks. And I have! I have been carrying him in the baby Bjorn, pram, also co-sleeping etc. so he can get a good sleep.
    I guess my biggest concern is: how long is this going to last, and am I not getting him used to this?

    My husband is helping every night by looking after him for 3hrs while I get a head-start on the night, which has been amazing.

    I guess I am just concerned for the future, I am fine with doing all this for now (rocking, patting, pram, wearing, co-sleeping etc) but how can I stop this later on (and will I ever be able to sleep in my bed again??).

    Thanks again for all the tips.
    Oh, and one last thing, totally understood about controlled crying, thanks for this too

  7. #15
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    There is definitely a light at the end of the tunnel, my youngest is now 10 weeks and for the first 8 weeks exclusively co-slept, it only took us a couple of days to transition him to his cot at 8 weeks, he now self settles 80% of the time and we've done that all without any form of crying. Try not to think about too far in the future, IMO there are no such thing as bad habits at this age.

    Sent from my GT-I9305T using The Bub Hub mobile app

  8. #16
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    My dd is 9 months. I'm a first time mummy so have no idea what I am doing!! My dd is a terrible sleeper. . Still wakes in the night. .. however. .. for the first 4 months in the day she would only sleep in the swing or pram.. at night she would sleep in her bassinet or cot.
    Now at 9 months she has been sleeping in her cot in the day. . for a while now too. They aren't always long sleeps but she will sleep there. I don't know how it changed it just did.
    I guess what I'm saying is at some point bub will find their own rhythm and routine. I still find it hard at 9 months but I do have a baby who can put herself to sleep in a cot on her own.

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  9. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mathermy View Post
    I'm typing one handed but agree with all of the above.Our baby behaved/s very similar to yours, he's seven weeks. Whilst most people have some idea of what is involved caring for a newborn the reality of the sheer exhaustion of it can be a rude shock for anyone. This is my second and it's still shocking to me! Lol
    Please give you and your baby some more time to adjust, everything is so new to the both of you that you need to set your expectations really low, take it one day at a time and be gentle on the both of you as you learn to adjust and get to know each other.
    Admittedly I am strongly against CC in any way shape or form but that aside logic tells me that a newborn baby doesn't have the developmental capacity to learn what it is you want him to learn yet, I believe the only thing CC could teach your baby right now is that you won't respond when they need you
    Right now we just try and roll with the punches with an attitude of acceptance and a sense of humour. Our baby enjoys white noise (quite loud!), his swing, being swaddled, his boobs (lol) , showering and bathing with us, walks in the pram, co sleeping and lots and lots of cuddles!

    Right now I enjoy sleep, coffee and other people giving me a little grace as I fumble through this time.

    It might help to identify where the frustration comes from specifically, are you missing the time to yourself, sleep, worried about the state of the house? Etc then work from there to find other ways to meet those needs while still meeting those of your wee one. Rather than trying to fight your babies need for you to accommodate yours. Both needs are equally important but for us adults its so much easier to be flexible, especially with a little support from a great partner, friends or family.

    Best of luck and a big dose of empathy, it's so very hard a d it's ok to acknowledge that xx

    Ps, for the record he is honestly getting better all the time. During the day so long as he is fed and changed more often he drifts off in his swing after being wrapped with the white noise on. In the first few weeks he would only feed or be put to sleep in our arms.
    I think you are right. I have to lower my expectations.
    I am expecting this tiny new baby to fit into my life when it should be me adapting to him! I am slowly getting my head around it.
    We got some cleaners in (to help with the messiness of the flat), and no matter how I feel, I go for a long walk everyday and get some sun, this helps my mood.

    I know I should just feel lucky I've got a healthy baby boy, when I see what other health problems family have, a non-sleeping baby is not that bad after all.

    It takes time to adjust they say, I agree

    Thanks for your help.

  10. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by peanutmonkey View Post
    There is definitely a light at the end of the tunnel, my youngest is now 10 weeks and for the first 8 weeks exclusively co-slept, it only took us a couple of days to transition him to his cot at 8 weeks, he now self settles 80% of the time and we've done that all without any form of crying. Try not to think about too far in the future, IMO there are no such thing as bad habits at this age.

    Sent from my GT-I9305T using The Bub Hub mobile app
    How did you transition him from co-sleeping to cot?
    Thanks.

  11. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mags2095 View Post
    How did you transition him from co-sleeping to cot?
    Thanks.
    We did one sleep at a time, made sure we were watching for his tired signs and set up a routine for going to sleep which was a nappy change, swaddle tightly, quick cuddle then into his cot with curtains open during the day (so he can differentiate between day and night) and we'd turn his white noise on, put him in the cot and I'd hold my hand firmly on his tummy for a few minutes and then walk out while he was still awake. Some sleeps I have to go in and put my hand back on his tummy for a bit but he's pretty good now.

    We also elevated his cot mattress, a LOT as he has bad reflux. This helped a lot.

    Sent from my GT-I9305T using The Bub Hub mobile app

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  13. #20
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    Sounds totally normal OP I barely even remember the first 6 weeks with both my boys thanks to sleep deprivation! The newborn stage to me is such a blur. My only advice would be to sleep whenever you get the chance! Oh and when it comes to routines etc. I have found that as soon as you think you have your baby/babies routine figured out they will go and change it on you anyway! So just go with their lead. I have done all the "no no's" such as rocked and fed to sleep and have never had any problems with creating "bad habits" either so just do what you have to and don't worry about that (that's my opinion anyway). All the best OP - I wish someone had told me that in the first couple of months especially, I would be wondering what the hell I had got myself in for!! But, that it does get better

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