+ Reply to Thread
Page 18 of 24 FirstFirst ... 81617181920 ... LastLast
Results 171 to 180 of 239
  1. #171
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    Country WA
    Posts
    6,643
    Thanks
    3,135
    Thanked
    3,028
    Reviews
    13
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    What Im reading on BH: which makes me think: it is a rather narrow slither of society represented on BH (mums, many of who are either bored, lonely, have free time to spare and/or are probably predisposed to mental problems). The majority of BH readers are probably predisposed to have values and experiences that make them empathise with a mother who has killed her kids.
    You know VP, I used to admire your guts in here. You always called it like you saw it. I don't think I've ever agreed with you, but at least you had the courage of your convictions and didn't run off crying making posts about how mean people were to you. But seriously? C'mon. Yes, you won the straight shooter award or whatever it was, but now you just seem to be trying too hard. There's a big difference between being a straight shooter and being a try-hard who stirs the pot.

    Anyway, back to topic, I don't really feel for the Mum at all. There is so much about this that I don't understand. How the father could not want to see his kids for weeks on end, how the grandmother didn't see something was wrong and push harder, why the landlord didn't report the state of the house to DOCS. So many people with so much opportunity to avoid the horrific outcome.

    I feel for those poor babies. Starving to death over weeks and weeks. Not being let out of their cot. Constantly crying. I have a DD nearly the same age and I just can't comprehend the treatment those poor babies got at all. It wasn't like she snapped. That I may have sympathy for. But to neglect and starve your kids for a long time and cause their death? Yeah, I'm struggling to find any sympathy for either parent.

    I don't know if mum had depression or a mental illness. Some report say yes, some say no. Either way, those babies didn't have to die. Her 11yo daughter shouldn't have had to have found them. The whole situation is just so extremely sad.

  2. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Californication For This Useful Post:

    beebs  (17-08-2013),Mathermy  (16-08-2013),NancyBlackett  (16-08-2013)

  3. #172
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Posts
    4
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    22
    Reviews
    0

  4. #173
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Posts
    2,565
    Thanks
    2,851
    Thanked
    1,254
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    One article said she suffered from "magical thinking" in which she thought the amount she was feeding them was fine. It sounds like a classic symptom of schizophrenia to me, but I'm not a mental health professional & don't have all of the facts. No mother of sound mind would kill her kids, so schizophrenic/psychopathic/PND, doesn't matter. She was mentally ill & someone should have noticed something was wrong & reported it earlier - then maybe those poor babies would still be alive. Although, they're probably better off wherever they are now given the family situation (absentee father, alcoholic grandmother, mentally ill mother). Does anyone know what the story was with the 11yr old who found them? I know at 11 I would have known it wasn't right to keep babies locked in their cot & hardly fed. At the very least I would have said something at school & a teacher would have twigged that something was wrong.

    edit - I haven't read all of the other posts.
    Last edited by Funchu; 16-08-2013 at 12:43.

  5. #174
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Posts
    172
    Thanks
    84
    Thanked
    130
    Reviews
    0
    Thank you oldmember, that was heartbreaking to read. So many people failed this mum and her children.

    I think this story is making me more grateful to have such a loving and supportive partner, who is there to pick me up each time I stumble.

    I've been trying to think of a way to explain the slow demise into depression that seems so hard to understand. People can live with depression for months and not even realise. Each step down can be minute, imperceptible. And each new level becomes the new normal.

    I know, for me, with the food thing it happens so gradually. I stop preparing well balanced meals and we have lots of quick meals, cheese on toast, pasta that sort of thing. Then next is toast or even just bread, then down to fruit. But it can be over weeks, and I will have the odd good day were I do prepare a decent meal. So I guess from the outside I could look like I'm coping, it's just that I'm too busy to cook much.

    I think with this mum, she just kept slipping further and further down. And each new level became normal for her. You don't realise how much of your life you have lost control of.

    I feel really conflicted over this thread. I can see so much of my depression in her story. I feel so uncomfortable and vulnerable writing what I have, yet I want to say more. If me being honest makes one person see red flags in the behaviour of someone they know, then they can offer compassion, support and help, and maybe prevent another tragedy.

    Sent from my HTC One X using The Bub Hub mobile app

  6. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to sakabla For This Useful Post:

    CicerFabaceaexxxx  (16-08-2013),Kirst33  (16-08-2013),RipperRita  (16-08-2013)

  7. #175
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    3,517
    Thanks
    432
    Thanked
    3,246
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Funchu View Post
    One article said she suffered from "magical thinking" in which she thought the amount she was feeding them was fine. It sounds like a classic symptom of schizophrenia to me, but I'm not a mental health professional & don't have all of the facts. No mother of sound mind would kill her kids, so schizophrenic/psychopathic/PND, doesn't matter. She was mentally ill & someone should have noticed something was wrong & reported it earlier - then maybe those poor babies would still be alive. Although, they're probably better off wherever they are now given the family situation (absentee father, alcoholic grandmother, mentally ill mother). Does anyone know what the story was with the 11yr old who found them? I know at 11 I would have known it wasn't right to keep babies locked in their cot & hardly fed. At the very least I would have said something at school & a teacher would have twigged that something was wrong.
    Ah, so, mother cant be blamed due to mental health issues but an eleven year old child ought to bare some of the responsibilities for her siblings being dead.

    That is honestly appauling and not the first time in this thread ive read it, or something like it.

  8. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Jennaisme For This Useful Post:

    Patience Belmont  (16-08-2013),VicPark  (16-08-2013)

  9. #176
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    164
    Thanks
    46
    Thanked
    27
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by sunnyflower View Post
    If all this true then the father, the landlord, the neighbours and the foster and biological grandmother all have blood on their hands.

    How tragic....
    Yeah but what happens when report something like this. Does it actually get anywhere? A family member witnessed a bad case of abuse this week and called the police. They were unable to do anything. It happened in a public area so unsure of name/address etc to report it to docs. Whats going to happen to that poor baby?

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  10. #177
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    In the sticks!!
    Posts
    20,635
    Thanks
    3,222
    Thanked
    2,540
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by sakabla View Post

    I think this story is making me more grateful to have such a loving and supportive partner, who is there to pick me up each time I stumble.



    Sent from my HTC One X using The Bub Hub mobile app
    Me too. I honestly cannot comprehend how I would do it without him. I hope that one day I can repay him.

    He has put up with so much from me and never gives up on me. I have been suicidal several times since last year and if it wasn't for his love and help I'm not sure what would have happened.

    I feel like a burden and pray that one day he can have a normal wife. I don't know why he loves me but he does and I am so very lucky. Others are not so fortunate.

  11. #178
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    In the sticks!!
    Posts
    20,635
    Thanks
    3,222
    Thanked
    2,540
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Lol
    Vp!

    I'm neither lonely or bored. I have a big family and stacks of friends. 5 kids and a full time job plus things like class readjng, a million sports and activities, Duties at church....I just like it here and have actually learnt alot about certain things in my 9 or so years here.

  12. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Ffrenchknickers For This Useful Post:

    beebs  (17-08-2013),Kirst33  (16-08-2013),~Marigold~  (17-08-2013)

  13. #179
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    4,125
    Thanks
    1,810
    Thanked
    1,694
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I don't think she is blaming the 11 yr old, merely wondering how she didn't notice it or tell someone or something? I wondered too, not in a blame way, coz out of everyone in this whole sad story, I feel for her the most. I have 12 month old twins and an almost 11 yr old, if in 6 months time my marriage ended, and I started to completely lose it, I wonder what my big girls would do. I think they would try and do everything that I should be doing, and they'd call my mum or sister, or one of my close friends (who they call aunty). I don't know if they would talk to a teacher because I think they would feel incredible shame. This woman had very little family support, and if the daughter was too shame to tell her teachers (and we know she wasn't at school a lot anyway) or anyone else, then I guess thats how it happened

  14. The Following User Says Thank You to Annabella For This Useful Post:

    Funchu  (16-08-2013)

  15. #180
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    4,125
    Thanks
    1,810
    Thanked
    1,694
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by sakabla View Post
    I think this story is making me more grateful to have such a loving and supportive partner, who is there to pick me up each time I stumble.
    Yes, I don't think people can possibly comprehend how much harder things are when you do not have the support of a loving partner or family.


 

Similar Threads

  1. *trigger warning* At least she was honest...
    By Cat21 in forum Pregnancy & Birth General Chat
    Replies: 37
    Last Post: 24-02-2013, 22:10
  2. Bullying *Possible Trigger Warning*
    By lolly137 in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 25
    Last Post: 07-09-2012, 21:27

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Riverton Leisureplex
An Extreme Family Pass at Riverton Leisureplex is the ultimate way to cool off during the summer school holidays. The $30 Pass allows pool and waterslide access for 2 adults and 2 children, as well as a drink, popcorn and an icy pole for each person.
sales & new stuffsee all
Wendys Music School Melbourne
Wondering about Music Lessons? FREE 30 minute ASSESSMENT. Find out if your child is ready! Piano from age 3 years & Guitar, Singing, Drums, Violin from age 5. Lessons available for all ages. 35+ years experience. Structured program.
Use referral 'bubhub' when booking
featured supporter
Billington Street
For stationery as unique as you are! ♥ Handmade, custom designed stationery for all of life's celebrations
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!