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  1. #531
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    I worked it out

  2. #532
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Ted View Post
    Rainbow - I hope you have so much fun at your baby shower. It is definitely something to look forward to and such a great excuse to catch up with friends.

    Toni - I'm definitely going to read River's story when I have another break from study later tonight.

    Channy - DH and I experienced a family member who was struggling with the gender of their baby recently, and yes, it was someone who had always wanted a girl and it is the last child they are having. Of course they will love him to bits. I think some ladies have dreams for their career, wedding, dp, babies and some see themselves specifically wanting one gender over another, or a pidgeon pair. For the family member involved she had been told often that it was a girl by other people (not a sonographer) and so was not prepared mentally. I don't think there's anything wrong with specifically hoping for one gender over another, as many women are then prepared to accept what they are given. Personally I didn't mind what we had, but after having a girl I can see the possibilities in the relationship we can have in the future and look forward to it...and she helps me organise the boys already After having two boys though...statistically we were prepared for another boy and were quite shocked when we found out. We couldn't found out with our first, but have since as I like to be organised also. I still pack gender-neutral for the delivery though!
    I don't think there is anything wrong with hoping either, it's the expressing of the bitter disappointment that caught me off guard.
    Last edited by ChannyV; 10-08-2013 at 18:49.

  3. #533
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    I'm very sorry if my comment today offended anyone, it's very hard to tell through words alone if I have, but was just sharing a thought

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    FirstTimeMummy2012  (10-08-2013)

  5. #534
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    Quote Originally Posted by ChannyV View Post
    I'm very sorry if my comment today offended anyone, it's very hard to tell through words alone if I have, but was just sharing a thought
    Channy - I agree with you TBH - as people who took a long time to get to this point and we both lost many little souls, it is hard to fathom those thoughts. However, I also get it. For those who love their little ones, but a little sad they will never know what it is like to have a little one of the other gender.
    BUT I can tell that your thoughts are around people who are absolutely gutted & go on and on about it. I have a friend who grieved and then accepted - I don't get those who can not get over it...ever.....

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    ChannyV  (10-08-2013)

  7. #535
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    Oh no, Channy, I don't think you could have possibly offended anyone with that. I was just trying to share what I had also noticed recently and ourselves as I think a lot of the disappointment comes from preconceived ideas and dreams/mindset which is difficult to change right away when they find out. It is hard to see people who openly dislike/despise that they are having a particular gender after they have had time to readjust though. Any baby is precious, it is a shame that some people don't prepare themselves for the chance that it could be the other when it is ultimately down to a lot of chance.

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    ChannyV  (10-08-2013)

  9. #536
    rainbow road's Avatar
    rainbow road is online now look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    Definitely not offended Channy!

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    ChannyV  (10-08-2013)

  11. #537
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    Quote Originally Posted by ToniS View Post
    Very excited to have River's birth story published on bubhub newsletter. I have put a link in my signature for anyone who is interested
    Just read your story - how lovely. Glad it all went well and that you're so close to your mum. She is the same weight as my DD when she was born!

  12. #538
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    Three Little Birds is offline Formerly Squiggsmom - I'll make it to the moon if I have to crawl.
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    Not offended at all Channy. I agree with you. It's one thing to be a bit bummed for whatever reason then to get over it. I can understand that. It's quite another to be really vocal about it. My SIL and BIL found out the gender with my niece. They were hoping for a boy and got a girl. They were really disappointed at first but now couldn't imagine their lives any different. Yet, I can't help but think, "What happens if someone slips around my niece or says something like 'well, she's acting like the boy you wanted'" when she gets older. How is she going to feel? Going to the step of abortion though, not ok.

    Feel free to voice a thought. I think we're all friends in here.

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    ChannyV  (10-08-2013)

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    Rainbow: Yay for babyshower. Thats my bro's birthday.

    Channy: Don't think anyone would get offended you were just voicing your opinion.

    MissX: With the PPL even though you have done it online you still need to fill out the paperwork you get in hospital, you just get to skip a heap of questions. I didn't realise and had to fill it out at the office.

    LittleTed: Thank-you. Yes I am really close with all my family which is why I struggle with them so far away.

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    ChannyV  (10-08-2013)

  16. #540
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    I just wanted to add in my 2 cents on the comment channy was talking about even though I'm not usually here.

    I'm in the same dig as you channy and I saw the comment you are talking about. I couldn't believe it and just had to walk away from fb for a while. Considering how hard some people struggle to have a baby I think it was a bit uncalled for.

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    ChannyV  (10-08-2013)


 

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