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  1. #1
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    Default Using husband's money while on maternity leave

    Hi all,

    This is a bit of a conundrum for me and hoping for some opinions!

    I am just in my first week of maternity leave, with my baby expected in early August. My maternity allowance will kick in after the birth, and my husband and I want to sort out how we will manage our money when that happens.

    We have always paid 50/50 on all bills (incl. mortgage), even though I earn a little more than he does. When I go on maternity allowance, I will be earning half what he earns. He is expecting that I will still pay 50/50 of everything using my maternity allowance, but this will give me no personal spending money, and might perhaps eat into my savings.

    It doesn't seem fair to me that while I am taking a reduced pay packet in order to care for our child, his financial situation will hardly change at all.

    I am interested to hear how other people managed this change in finances, what you expect from your partner, and what, exactly, is fair!? I just can't work it out!

    Thanks

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    No advice as never been married but that sounds crap!!
    You are taking time off work to look after HIS child. He should be paying more while you aren't at work, I wouldn't be standing for that. Your partner sounds very selfish!

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  5. #3
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    We have pooled all our money together from the day we decided we wanted to buy a house. My pay and his go into one account. We pay the bills, Including mortgage, save some and have the same amount of spending money each for fun stuff. This works for us. Hope you find a solution.
    it seems a little unfair to me that you need to dig into your savings.

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    Hey :-)

    Both our pay checks go into the same account so we don't / won't have this issue. Is there a reason you both wont do joint acc??

    Have you discussed this with him? Maybe if you explain it more he will understand?

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    Agree with Bexter.

    Maybe now is the time to be making one account and all the money be 'your' money.

    His proposal is very unfair and selfish and if I were you I would be standing my ground and not backing down.

    What reasons is he giving to explain the fairness of all this?

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    Combine all the money

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    We have a joint account and don't have seperate money.

    If you don't plan on changing to a joint account, then I'd be charging him child care costs. If you returned to work you'd both have to pay child care costs, so while you are home looking after his child, then it's only fair you receive payment for that from him

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    Is there a reason all of your money isn't shared? I don't think I've ever heard of any married couple who don't have combined finances to be honest? Not having a dig or anything but its worth talking about with him, especially now your about to welcome a bub. In our house all money is 'our' money, there's no yours and mine. Your situation sounds really unfair. I hope you work it out.

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    I have never understood how couples have separate finances particularly when children are involved. Someone always seems disadvantaged & it doesn't make sense. What he is proposing is ridiculous & unfair. My husband & I share all of our money, I've resigned after being on maternity leave & neither of us think I'm spending his money. It's our money for our family. Good luck but I think this is a conversation that should have been had a while ago.

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    We have separate accounts, but it is all 'our' money. My employer mat leave and ppl have just run out and I will be making my tax return last as long as possible, then I will be living off our joint savings till the end of the year. All I pay for at the moment is day to day living expenses. Groceries, kid's clothes, a few small bills (cleaner and my phone bill) when I can, otherwise I just ask DP to pay it, or pay it from our joint account (not the savings, another we have for bills)
    If your DH expects you to still pay for half I would be giving him an invoice for child care fees

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