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  1. #1
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    Default Tips for supporting someone with PND?

    Hi all, one of the lovely mums in my antenatal class has got signs of PND, just wondering what tips you have for supporting her ... I don't know whether I should keep my distance & let her come to me if she wants support or whether I should try and make plans with her all the time to give her some company...

    I have been thinking of taking over a cooked meal .... But just not to sure how else I can help ??

    Any suggestions??

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    I think a cooked meal is lovely..

    Maybe ask her what she wants?

    You sound like a nice friend...

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    I just want to be supportive for her, but I also don't want to be overbearing if you know what I mean??

    You know how some people prefer to be alone to deal with their problems.

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    I definitely second a cooked meal and some good company.

    Just be careful in conversation, I remember feeling worse sometimes after a friend would visit as they always seemed to have everything together and still wanted to help me. I liked it when someone could at least identify how hard parenting is and sometimes shared their struggles, made me feel more normal.

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    I would just treat them like any other new mum (i.e. help with meals, washing, holding the baby if they want) and let her talk if/when she wants to.

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    Cooked meal would be wonderful. That and just being there. Offering to come over and watch the bub/kids while she has a shower in peace.
    As someone who has suffered (a long time) with PND etc. Its just the best thing to know there is someone i can talk to.
    You sound like a lovely, caring person.

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    Cooked meals.

    Take her out for a coffee.

    Take her out to lunch/dinner.

    Go for a walk by the beach with her.
    Watch a happy movie with her.

    Maybe buy her a happy book you'd think she'd enjoy..

    Call her and just ask how her day is.

    When you see her doing something good with her bub, tell her! Tell her she's such a wonderful mum.

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    Thanks for the tips I am in the middle of moving at the moment, but as soon as I get settled I will definitely be doing these things... Her mum has flown to be with her at the moment, I'm not too sure how long she plans to stay though...

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    EternalOptimist is offline Never say you have failed until you have reached your last attempt; never say you have reached your last attempt until you have succeeded.
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    As someone with PND I find it very hard to get motivated to do anything even when asked & find myself making excuses not to go out. On the other hand if my friends just show up with a meal/coffee/conversation it makes me feel so much better.

    Like the others mentioned, b mindful if u have an "easy" baby as I have outright ignored one of my friends as she has a "perfect baby" & it makes me feel so horrible after catching up with her hearing how her baby sleeps so well, she has time to bake cakes & always looks fantastic.

    You sound like a lovely friend :-)

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    I didn't have PND but I have had depression before and I would have loved a friend just pick up the phone and call me just to chat to me. And especially if talking about your child don't act like they are the best baby in world and motherhood is a breeze as that would just make me feel worse.

    Just stay in regular contact with your friend sometimes just knowing that a person does care about you helps on the dark days when you can't do anything.

    What a lovely friend you are though for noticing. Wish I had someone like you when I needed it :-)


 

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