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  1. #161
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Not necessarily. You could argue a SAHP uses lots of DC for mental stimulation by socialising with adults, seeking hobbies, starting a WAH business. Getting much needed down time from the kids. Again, I would never use DC 5 days a week. But I don't see these reasons as any more or less important than a holiday or ambition.

    Someone put a negative spin on working as well. Not wanting to deal with the kids, not budgeting on one income properly. Now of course I don't believe thats the norm.... at all. But my point is that when you look for negative reasons you can always find them.

    I have my own personal beliefs on the subject, somewhat similar to you Vic. But as long as a child isn't abused then it's not my business. I don't see the child of a 5 day a week DC SAHM being any differently effected than the child of a working 5 day a week parent.
    I don't think anyone's questioning the effects on the kids. It's the motives and righteousness of the parents in question.

    Starting a business is working. All the other reasons for putting a kid in daycare full time if your a SAHP are crap and reflect negatively on the parent (socializing with adults and hobbies). Not saying their aren't other valid reasons. And not saying people should jump to a conclusion about what the reasons are.

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  3. #162
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mdk View Post
    I am a little curious as I don't actually know any stay at home mums who use full time care. Is it that common? And if you do or know someone who does what are their reasons??
    I know of a few.
    One of them-
    *has 2 children in ft care (3 & under 1)
    hasn't worked or studied since her first *pregnancy
    *fills her time with shopping and visiting friends

    ETA her reason is that she thinks it's important for her children to get social interaction.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mdk View Post
    I am a little curious as I don't actually know any stay at home mums who use full time care. Is it that common? And if you do or know someone who does what are their reasons??
    I don't think anyone on here knows people that fit the stay at home Nd put the kids in daycare full time criteria. It's all a hypothetical debate...

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    Quote Originally Posted by redlipsandpearls View Post
    I know of a few.
    One of them-
    *has 2 children in ft care (3 & under 1)
    hasn't worked or studied since her first *pregnancy
    *fills her time with shopping and visiting friends

    ETA her reason is that she thinks it's important for her children to get social interaction.
    I take my last post back!

    This person sounds lazy and tad precious...

  6. #165
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    As others have said, it's a bit much to imply that all parents who work do it because they need to - just as its ridiculous to say that all sahp do it because they have decided its best for their kids. There are plenty of people who work because they want to, not need to, or because they can't cope with being with their kids all the time. Yet they are seen as more deserving of child care than women who want to be at home without their kids, or who cannot cope with their kids all the time but don't have a job??
    Personally I think there are kids who are better off at child care than with their parents, and whether their parents work or not has no bearing on that.
    I am amazed at the judging on here honestly, it seems we have moved to a place where we don't judge working parents for leaving their kids any longer, but still judge sahp constantly.
    I think the point to remember is that the impact on the child of being in full time care, good or bad, will be the same whether their parents work or not. It doesn't change for the child, and the impact on them is surely the important thing???

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  8. #166
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    Quote Originally Posted by twotrunks View Post
    As others have said, it's a bit much to imply that all parents who work do it because they need to - just as its ridiculous to say that all sahp do it because they have decided its best for their kids. There are plenty of people who work because they want to, not need to, or because they can't cope with being with their kids all the time. Yet they are seen as more deserving of child care than women who want to be at home without their kids, or who cannot cope with their kids all the time but don't have a job??
    Personally I think there are kids who are better off at child care than with their parents, and whether their parents work or not has no bearing on that.
    I am amazed at the judging on here honestly, it seems we have moved to a place where we don't judge working parents for leaving their kids any longer, but still judge sahp constantly.
    I think the point to remember is that the impact on the child of being in full time care, good or bad, will be the same whether their parents work or not. It doesn't change for the child, and the impact on them is surely the important thing???
    Yeah they are seen as more deserving of childcare by the Govt because those that work contribute to the economy.

    That's why working parents are meant to get priority of access. Shame they don't in reality.

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  10. #167
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    Quote Originally Posted by Meg2 View Post
    This is becoming a really bizarre discussion. I mean really, how many people work for fun? Sure, many people get a lot of satisfaction from their jobs, but I'd be willing to bet that for the vast majority the main incentive is financial, not because it is such a enjoyable way to spend a day.
    Lots of people (including myself) say they would continue working if they won the lottery. I think for many people work gives a sense of personal achievement and purpose.

    And imma just put it out there- if you don't work, don't have any commitments such as caring or volunteering or have any sort of medical issues that prevent you from working or caring for your children, and you don't work and put your kids in full time care, I judge you. Not as a mother, but as a lazy sod. If you just want to read magazines, get your nails done and have lunch with friends, yes I think you're lazy and a pretty boring person. *dons flame proof suit*

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  12. #168
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    I think your heart is in the right place but this is a naive concept. Childcare is a service. Make it all non for profit, you'll lose the incentive to compete and the whole system will go up the crapper.
    Not if regulated by the government. My children's centre is run by the local government and of much higher standards than privately run centres. The staff are more valued, treated much better, very little staff turn over. Pretty much the same faces since my first baby started in 2009, apart from the trainee and a retired staff member.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mdk View Post
    I am a little curious as I don't actually know any stay at home mums who use full time care. Is it that common? And if you do or know someone who does what are their reasons??
    I have known two (in 20 yrs). The first one was just plain loopy, she had 6 kids that all went to full time cc at 6 weeks. She thought it was just what you do. The other felt like she need to be young and free, she had her first child a few days after her 14th birthday.

  14. #170
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    I don't think anyone on here knows people that fit the stay at home Nd put the kids in daycare full time criteria. It's all a hypothetical debate...
    I've nannied (temped) for a few families who had a nanny 50 hours a week and mum was a SAHM. I wasn't very impressed by them and I couldn't have worked for any of then full time.

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