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  1. #91
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    Quote Originally Posted by Meg2 View Post
    A family might be lucky enough to have a man that earns enough to support the family, but if the woman isn't also working then she becomes financially dependant on her husband. If this works for someone's family, that's fine and their choice. But if a woman chooses to maintain some financial independance then I consider that a 'need' not a luxury (regardless of how much her husband earns).
    I'm not saying women that choose to work shouldn't get a place. My comment was in relation to the one I quoted, saying women need to work therefore should get priority. My point was that 'need' can be a grey area. When you have a 2 income family on min wage struggling to pay the bills then obviously they should get priority over a partnered SAHM. But what about a woman that chooses to work for mental stimulation who has lots of family vs a single SAHM to 2 small children who doesn't have a diagnosed mental illness but is struggling to cope with no family or supports?

    All I'm saying is need is open to interpretation.

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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    I'm not saying women that choose to work shouldn't get a place. My comment was in relation to the one I quoted, saying women need to work therefore should get priority. My point was that 'need' can be a grey area. When you have a 2 income family on min wage struggling to pay the bills then obviously they should get priority over a partnered SAHM. But what about a woman that chooses to work for mental stimulation who has lots of family vs a single SAHM to 2 small children who doesn't have a diagnosed mental illness but is struggling to cope with no family or supports?

    All I'm saying is need is open to interpretation.
    Yes, I understood the point you were making. My point is that even if the family unit doesn't need the money from the woman's wage, she still *needs* to work if she is to maintain financial independance. So I don't think 'need' is at all a grey area in this case.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lili81 View Post
    So do FT working parents put their kids in long day care for 6 days a week so that the parents have 1 day at home without kids to do the house chores and relax?
    )
    I actually get to complete more chores in my lunch break while working, than I do at home on mat leave!

    I also get to sit on my butt most of the day, eating & drinking when I want, going to the toilet in peace....aahhhh, I can't wait to get back to work and have a break!! I'm much busier at home with a 22mth & 4mth old, which I never though was possible.

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  6. #94
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    Quote Originally Posted by kw123 View Post
    I think a lot of it is jealousy... Working mums don't get the chance to do chores on their own or re-energise while kids are in daycare. But in all honesty, I'm sure most of us would do it if we could!
    I agree with this. Sometimes as a working mum I think 'well where's MY downtime?' When I'm working I go straight from work to childcare to pick up DS at 4.30. I could leave him there till 6, but I don't think that's fair on him. And the days we're home I've thought of sending him to a gym creche but again I don't feel its fair that the two short days we're together I don't spend my time with him. So yep I'm totally jealous of sahp's who use child care. I currently am one and its pretty great!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Meg2 View Post
    A family might be lucky enough to have a man that earns enough to support the family, but if the woman isn't also working then she becomes financially dependant on her husband. If this works for someone's family, that's fine and their choice. But if a woman chooses to maintain some financial independance then I consider that a 'need' not a luxury (regardless of how much her husband earns).
    I agree 100%. It is absolutely a need for a woman to be financially independent imo.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRedV View Post
    Daycare centres do have a list of priority. Pretty sure working mums are more of a priority for spots than those who don't work?
    Who's to say a sahp doesn't need the time at daycare as much as a working parent??? I have had to book ds into daycare on extra days because I had to go to hospital. So I don't think a daycare has the right to decide who is more important.

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  10. #97
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    Quote Originally Posted by mummtime101 View Post
    Who's to say a sahp doesn't need the time at daycare as much as a working parent??? I have had to book ds into daycare on extra days because I had to go to hospital. So I don't think a daycare has the right to decide who is more important.
    It's not the daycare, it's the Govt. And it's not about WHO is more important. It's about circumstances.

    Occasional care exists for a circumstance you have described.

    Parents who work can't take their kids to work. Parents who don't work can keep them with them (usual exceptions aside).

    Parents who want to work, not being able to work because there is no care available is a huge issue. For society in general but obviously the economy as well. I was very nearly in this position and it would either have been a choice of 90% of my salary going on a nanny or resigning and not working at all. Ridiculous.

    Fortunately I got a spot at the last minute (after being on 12 lists for 15 months).
    Last edited by kw123; 11-07-2013 at 14:18.

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  12. #98
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    Agreeing with kw again. The government doesn't care about 'fair' as much as it cares about the economy. They want people working, not 'taking a break'.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mummtime101 View Post
    Who's to say a sahp doesn't need the time at daycare as much as a working parent??? I have had to book ds into daycare on extra days because I had to go to hospital. So I don't think a daycare has the right to decide who is more important.

    That's what ocassional care is for I think most of us (well I know I was) are referring to full time, long term daycare. I.e. 5 days a week, every single week.

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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    Lots of mums work bc they want the mental stimulation, or they don't need the money but just like extra for nice holidays etc. If these mums don't need to work, maybe they shouldn't have their child in care? Not saying they shouldn't btw, just pointing out that if we are deeming it's only ok to have your kids in long hours at DC bc you need to work, what about lots of mums on BH that have said they don't have to work but do?
    I hope I have read this wrong but are you honestly arguing that a woman who works full time is the same as a woman who doesnt work or study at all, and also doesnt have her children in her care the majority of the time?.. I mean you are making it sound like employment is a recreational activity. Its not. It's work.. and even if some women return to work for personal as well as financial reasons.. thats hardly the same as dropping your kid off at daycare and then hanging out all day doing your own thing. It's a personal choice and obviously this is what some women feel is best for their families, but lets not pretend all choices are equal. If you can afford to basically have as much "me time" as you need Monday to Friday, you are extremely privileged. It is NOT the same as putting your children in daycare and then putting in a full days work. It's a little offensive to imply that really. again, maybe I have misunderstood, but as someone who juggles family life and working as best I can every day, I really do feel baffled at anyone who suggests this. and Staying home and raising children is a full time job. It requires a level of patience and caring which I am in awe of.. I would not put that in the same league as this choice either..

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