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  1. #11
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    I think your BIL was a bit over dramatic TBH. Its not like you were 3 hours late for lunch. Its only half an hour. What if you were stuck in traffic or something and were half an hour late?

    I try very hard not to wake bubs...I will leave it to the very last second as in the car is running, everything/one is in the car and then I wake bubs and go.

    With three old siblings she has had to be woken lots of time and I hate it as she is a crap sleeper so if she is having a good sleep I really want her to sleep.

    So...to answer your question...do I wake bubs? Usually I do as I personally hate being late. If its not really important, I will let her sleep. DD is not one of those babies that sleeps in the car or the pusher or wherever so it can be really difficult to get her to sleep if we are out.

    And to answer another pp....yeah sure its easy to say 'just don't plan anything during a sleep time' but if they sleep at lunch time and more often then not people plan things at lunch then what are you supposed to do?

    For me its more important to have a happy baby as it equals happy mummy. If I am planning a lunch and expect people to be there at 12 for example, all that person would need to do is say...'look cant make it at XX time but I will be there half an hour later...then I would simply say - will either save a plate or work around it. No biggie...I just appreciate being told IYKWIM.

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    If I have an appointment and need to leave at a certain time I will wake DS (just opening his bedroom door usually does the trick) otherwise I try not to if it's family, they all have kids and understand. I always send a message or call though.

  3. #13
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    I think as it was a family thing and you let them know (plus you weren't telling them to all put everything on hold for you) then he was rude and out of line.

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    My younger kids have had to be woken up due to school runs, but I only do it if essential.

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    Yep, my dd got woken. There were times where I just had to be at a drs appointment and would have to wake dd to get there. This is why I think capsules were the best thing ever invented for little bubs. I think that christmas with family is a sufficiently important event to get there on time to eat with the family so sorry I do think that I would have woken dd to get there.

    I would often pick dd up sleeping, put her in the car in her sleeping clothes and then she would wake a bit more in her own time and then dress her and do her hair in the car once we had arrived.

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    Thanks guys, Interesting to hear other people's perspectives.

    Fwiw I try to plan around nap times and if someone invites us over for lunch during that time I decline lunch and tell them we'll come over for a visit later on.

    Luckily most of my friends have Kids under 2 so they understand, but the Xmas thing made me wonder.

    Personally re BIL, he doesn't have kids and doesnt understand what it's like when kids don't sleep well etc. I guess from our end it was our 1st bub so we probably made more allowances for him than we do for ds2 (and with no 3 on the way I'd assume it will be sleeping in the pram alot)!

    I dunno, I know it's not to be late but I also don't get why close family insist on lunches at times that babies sleep- especially when MIL banishes and is well aware when the kids sleep!

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    I'd prefer to let them sleep but if I have plans or need to be somewhere then yes I'd wake them or put them in the car sleeping. DD4 is constantly getting woken for different reasons but she'll happily go back to sleep in the car or pram.

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    I wake DD, I try to put her down for her nap early though so she doesn't miss too much sleep.
    We've had a lot of parties, lunches and drs visits so she's used to being lugged around at all hours and handles it really well (even at times I thought she would get over tired and over stimulated).
    I hope our next Bub is as good at it lol


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  9. #19
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    Half an hour isn't too bad, I probably won't stress too much about that. Once I planned Christmas here for DHs family and his SILs crew (so 5 out of the 8 people invited) were an hour and a half late. Grrr.

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    If it is a special occasion (Christmas, party etc) I will plan my boys nap around it. For example if bub sleeps from 1-3 and lunch is 1:30 I will arrive early 12:30 and put bub down for a nap in the porta cot at 1. Or if I am meeting people for a birthday party at the park at 2:00 I will arrive at the park at 12:30 and go for a big walk in the pram, so bub would hopefully get at least an hour and a half. If its an informal lunch with family I would probably still plan ahead like that.

    I don't have much patience for people who commit to a time and then arrive an hour late because of lack of planning. If they say from the get go I won't be able to make it on time then that's OK. Or if something unexpected came up (sick child) that's totally fine. Or even if its a really young bub I would understand.

    I can see where your BIL is coming from. People put a lot of effort into planning Christmas lunch. A bit like a wedding they want it to go off like a hitch. Eating before key guests arrive is not cool. Either is turning up extra late. With my family though it probably wouldn't be an issue as we are never on time with Christmas lunch...


 

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