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  1. #31
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    At the first consultancy I worked for, my supervisor/ senior consultant was an old bachelor, about 60-65. He had never looked after himself and looked about 100. When typing at his computer desk, he'd just fall asleep mid sentence. His head would start lowering as he drifted off. He would sleep for about 5 mins, then jerk awake and continue typing. 15 minutes later, he'd fall asleep again. This would happen all day. One of my good friends working the same firm, at the desk opposite him and would always email me to watch him.

    At the same firm, we always had a group morning tea every Friday. The old guy would touch like five biscuits before choosing one to eat. Lots of food crumbs would also fall out of his mouth as he ate. He was also a keen sailer and managed to turn every single conversation into a conversation about his boat. No matter what the original topic of conversation was, he could always link it to his boat somehow.

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    A woman I work with is completely OTT about being the Guardian of the Biscuit Tin. She does the stationery/kitchen supply orders, and she rules with an iron fist. We had to have an uprising to be allowed Arnotts Assorted Creams instead of plain Scotch Fingers. Our manager (not the branch manager- our way way up manager) had to step in and tell her we were allowed the creams. She locks them up at night so the cleaner won't pinch them. And I once got a long lecture for refilling the biscuit jar when there were still a few lameo scotch fingers and anzacs at the bottom.

    That's just one example, I could talk for hours about her rules on pens.
    Replace the cookie jar with this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ar_cHAByG70 and something like oreos or the fairy bread cookies (pink with sprinkles) haha

  3. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by Degrassi View Post
    Just realised I have a story from just last week:

    I was telling my boss how my neck problems were improving since I've been having treatments the last few weeks.

    He asked me to come into his office and without warning, grabbed me from behind and attempted to crack my back! He is 73 years old

    Thanks pal.
    You sure he wasn't trying to cop a feel?

  4. #34
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    I work with a guy who burps mid-sentence and continues on as if nothing has happened. He also farts mid-sentence as well, by leaning to one side and letting one rip and continues talking. People around him wear headphones A LOT!

  5. #35
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    Used to work with a guy who kept about 10 big bottles of Pepsi Max on his desk at all times. Then his desk draws were filled with chocolate (fair enough on that one, so were mine haha!). But having to peer over the wall of Pepsi every time I has to ask him something was irritating.

    Every single day all he would eat for lunch was a can of tuna and the cheapest home brand white bread sandwiches spread with butter and filled with bananas then wash it down with the Pepsi Max.
    Needless to say on such a poor diet he would disappear to the bathroom most days and not be seen back at his desk for half an hour at a time. Eww...

    He also smelt so bad. His clothes had that horrible smell they get when you don't dry your washing completely.

    He also had a photo of his wife on his desk. She looked quite nice. Then one day we had a work function and he introduced me to his wife. She was a completely different person. I asked him about the photo and he simply said that was the photo that came with the frame!

    Don't get me started on his continuous sniffing and hanky use (ughhhh)..

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  7. #36
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    This is more of a gross story than weirdo....

    I used to work in a call centre where we hot seat (shared work stations) and there was this one lady who every shift would pluck her eyebrows (often to the point there wasn't much left) apply makeup to her face and then type on the keyboard, cut and manicure her nails, squeeze pimples, pick scabs off her arms (not even kidding) and eat food that generally scattered all over her desk and keyboard.

    It became a general rule of thumb to avoid using the work station after she had but sometimes if you had no choice it was a matter of attacking the space with alcohol wipes and a whole can of Glen20.

    One of those times a colleague of mine got stuck with the station this lady had just used and decided to give it a thorough clean... She decided to tip the keyboard upside down and tapped it on the desk and no joke nail clippings, scabs, eyelashes and a ton of food crumbs came flying out.

    Everyone who saw it was yelling 'Eeeewwwww!!!'

    Thank fully I don't work there anymore and where I do work I don't have to share desks.

  8. #37
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    I was temping in a job I was way overqualified for. I was bored out of my brain (so much so the CEO caught me making little cubes of blutak and lining them up along my desk!! - ok so he probably has a weirdo story about me!). But the girl I was replacing had been promoted, and she was a complete ditz. After a couple of weeks I saw her coming back in from having a smoke and commented that I didn't realise he was a smoker. She replied 'oh I'm not. I've just taken it up this week so I can get more breaks'. I then spent my time scheming ways to get put into her job haha.

    I worked with another lady who had been in her job for about 20 years, and was in the CFOs pocket. She was so friggin lazy and could get away with it. She used to take her hour long lunch break, then come back to the office, read the paper and eat her lunch. Her aunt used to call her and because it was a long distance call she'd ring her back and chat for an hour or more. Then complain to the CFO she had no time to file her reports, and it became my job!

    At my first job I was the receptionist. The owner would sometimes go home early in the afternoons. Within 10 mins of him leaving I'd always receive a phone call from a man in a strange accent asking for the owner. Someone later confirmed, after being in the car with him, that it was infact the owner calling and checking in.

  9. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    You sure he wasn't trying to cop a feel?
    Yeah, thankfully he isn't like that!

    But honestly, what a brain fart on his behalf to try and crack an employee's back (without consent)!

  10. #39
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    Subbing

  11. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by 3cats1pug View Post
    He also had a photo of his wife on his desk. She looked quite nice. Then one day we had a work function and he introduced me to his wife. She was a completely different person. I asked him about the photo and he simply said that was the photo that came with the frame!
    This has made me laugh so hard!


 

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