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    Default Introducing your children to the Club scene...good or bad?

    My SIL's DH went to jail for embezzlement. He stole money to fuel his addiction to gambling.(he is still in jail) He spent most of his time(after work) sitting in the club with his own mother and sometimes, on his own at the poker machines. As a result, the family suffered. My SIL didn't really like the club scene because of this. They would sometimes go for a meal but she never liked the other side of the club(poker machines, etc) But now, she is taking the little ones to the FREE disco and has encouraged her 18 year old daughter (and her bf) to join the club and experience the "whole feel of it"(her words). Father was a gambler and grandma a gambler. Just wondering if this is a wise decision. She takes the kids to the disco and they meet their cousins there. She said it is good for the kids because it provides a "happy" atmosphere. Given the power of addiction in the family I wonder if this is wise. Your thoughts. Children are 6, 9 and 18. SIL's family have had addictions with gambling too. My DH's grandparents lost a house through their addiction with gambling(horses)

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    I don't think a kid's disco is going to make anyone a gambler, even if it's held at a club.

    I actually thought, at first, by "club scene," you meant nightclubs... not old people clubs like sports clubs or RSLs. I think they're fairly harmless... and attending the place for a meal or a disco is unlikely to result in a poker-machine addiction.

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    I too thought you meant "clubbing"

    But heading up to the local RSL for the Roast of the Day, a go at the raffle and a bit of fun at the kids disco with cousins sounds ok to me? And low cost for family night out?

    Eta - gambling is everywhere in all it's different forms, like drugs are, and alcohol etc I think the best thing we can for our kids is educate, be open and supportive, and just talk, talk, talk
    Last edited by Mod-biscotti; 30-06-2013 at 19:40.

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    I can understand your concern op (as a child I feel I spent as a result of my parents spending, too much time at the local bowlo. My parents would go basically every afternoon and as such I would be there most days after school, and definitely every Friday and Saturday night and Sunday afternoon. I don't think its healthy for children. But given they're going to a kids disco to spend time with other kids I don't think its bad.

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    If it's merely just taking the kids to a fun free disco, then I see no issue with it. When my DD was 5 we lived near an RSL which ran a free kids disco on a Sunday and it had face painters, balloon artists etc. We used to go to it a couple of times a month as the kids loved the atmosphere. We don't gamble so that's never an issue, but even if you were so inclined, the disco was held in the function room far away from the gaming rooms and all parents had to stay with the children at the disco, so there was never any chance of parents dropping kids off to gamble etc. It was such a fun time, that we ended up booking our DD's birthday party there.

    OP, I realise the power of addiction can be quite strong and I also realise that for *some* especially those with a pre-disposition to addiction that hanging around the temptations of clubs etc could be a risky thing, however I think that if the intention is merely to take your children (not yours OP, generally speaking) for a good, free event and as your SIL said a 'happy atmosphere' then I think it is harmless and given the fact that the majority of the family have a gambling addiction, then I think it's probably a good way to show the children that clubs aren't always about a place to gamble. As you said, your SIL doesn't like the 'other side' of the club, so going on that fact I think it's ok what she's doing.

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    Sounds ok to me. I'm just trying to put the picture together in my head - by your SIL's DH, do you mean your brother? Is it the same one that lives overseas, or do you have more than one brother?

    The reason I ask is that, it sounds like you think about these things a bit. I know that we all worry about our families, but sometimes you have to let them be. It might be less stressful for you if you try not to worry so much about what they do.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cdro View Post
    Sounds ok to me. I'm just trying to put the picture together in my head - by your SIL's DH, do you mean your brother? Is it the same one that lives overseas, or do you have more than one brother?

    The reason I ask is that, it sounds like you think about these things a bit. I know that we all worry about our families, but sometimes you have to let them be. It might be less stressful for you if you try not to worry so much about what they do.
    It could mean her husband's sister's husband too.

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    My DH's sister and her Husband(he is in prison). I have family overseas..while they have tonnes of issues, none gambling, thankfully. Thanks for replies. Maybe see everyone's point of view. The kids do have fun,(I hear).

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    In my opinion she is being foolish (based on what you have said about her family and issues.)

    If I were her I'd be steering clear of the scene and finding other family activities to participate in.

    I wouldn't say that of everyone, but in her circumstances I just don't get what she's doing. Bizarre to me but it's her business.

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    I totally understand your concern and agree that it's an unwise decision. How does one get the feel of a gambling institution? And that's what a club is. It may present itself as something else but free discos and the like are a deliberate marketing ploy to get the punters in. It's like dressing sh*t with honey to make it taste better. And you can see by the comments in this thread that if it looks harmless then it is. Having worked in marketing for an organisation that housed pokies I can tell you this with accuracy and honesty. They get the parents in (the spenders) via the children. It's a dirty, nasty game and while we ourselves do not have a gambling history, none of my children will ever step inside a club as long as I'm alive (unless Xenophon succeeds in having pokies banned and clubs restored to what they used to be before the TAB et al ruined them).

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