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  1. #1
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    Default 10 month old starting day care. I'm really upset.

    I am due to go back to work next week and my dh and I decided 2 days a week would be ok for my ds to be in day care. I don't know if its hormones or because its nearly crunch time but I'm soooo upset and cried and couldn't sleep last night.

    He has had 2 half days yesterday and Monday which he was fine with. But they didn't have to put him to bed.

    I'm the only one who has put him down for his naps, and I give him a breastfeed and snuggle then put him to bed. My dh has tried but he has no patience so we decided he will just have to keep him up until he is really tired and then put him to bed when he looks after him while I'm at work. Dh does have plans to read a story, quiet time, bottle, snuggle etc before he has to keep him up if that doesn't work.

    The day care girls are lovely and will do everything I have suggested. I just can't see him settling without a fight. And is it fair to put a 10 month old into day care? Most of the mums in my playgroup don't have their kids in day care.

    I want to work a weekend shift a fortnight and my parents can look after him on Friday afternoons. But dh doesn't want me to work weekends because its "family time".

    We have agreed if he is really upset after Monday and Tuesday I can pull him out.

    I will be ok I'd my ds is ok. My poor little baby.

    Has anyone had a similar experience? What did you do? How did your child go?

  2. #2
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    I think you need to relax a bit.. a child settling into daycare is going to take time. Some babies/children cry for months on end then suddenly stop. my dd used to cry and make me feel terrible when i'd drop her off and then I would peek from around the corner and seriously, after 5 mins she would stop crying and start playing!! so here I was feeling awful all day and she was fine.. Don't worry about the mothers in play group, you are working, you do what you have to do. If I were you i'd give it more time to be honest. Nothing happens overnight. hugs!

  3. #3
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    My DD was similar but had been breastfed for all sleeps for 2 YEARS! She had never gone to sleep for anyone else, even her dad. She started daycare just after she turned 2 and I told them they wouldn't be able to get her to sleep. Imagine my surprise when I went to pick her up and she was sound asleep!
    Kids act differently in different environments, and child care workers have dealt with all of the situations! Your bub will be fine! I found the first few weeks DD cried when I left but quickly got over that

  4. #4
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    Dd was in day care full time from 4 months. Its not easy but two full time days ( in my opinion) is not long enough to make an informed decision to take your child out of daycare. There needs time for a bond and routine to develop.
    I know it's hard. Hugs.

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    Thank you bubhubbers. I will give him more time. I hope it doesn't take too long to settle in. You guys have made me feel better. And maybe I am a bit hormonal..

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    There is nothing wrong with putting him in daycare but he will take time to settle in. As a PP said quite often as soon as you leave they will stop crying. And one hint is make drop off quick and keep it the same everyday. Even if it means having to write notes for the carers to read later or ringing them up just after you leave to pass on notes. And they won't care if you ring just to see how he is. I still do it and my oldest has been in care 3 years.

  7. #7
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    My DS has been in daycare three days since 9 months. It was hard initially for both of us but its great now (it's been 4 months).

    I made a fairly long post about what to expect in another thread and will try and dig it out tonight.

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    You'd be surprised by how adaptable children are when it comes to daycare! Honestly, most of the time the parents have a harder time starting daycare than their bubs do.

    They key to drop-offs is a consistent routine and never just drop and ditch. Say goodbye, reassure that you'll see him later, and tell him he'll have heaps of fun or something of that nature. It'll be hard at first and you'll be tempted to call in every five minutes to check on DS (which you can totally do if you want until you adjust).

    I've found that every child has their own adjustment period - sometimes it's a day, other times it's a week - but they fall into the routine pretty quickly. The younger they are, generally the quicker they adapt. At the beginning they probably will cry and be unsettled. 99.9% of the time, the crying stops minutes after mum and dad leave (feeling horribly guilty for leaving their poor bub with a bunch of strangers!).

    Seriously - after a week or two, take a peek in after you leave and you'll see bub, who was crying only moments before you walked out the door, cheerfully attempting to brain another child with a Lego tower. (True story.)

    You may be surprised by how easily DS adapts to a new routine. Day care is exciting; it's like a day at the playground, only without mum and dad. There's always heaps to do and kids are easily distracted by fun.

    Child care workers are pretty good with the distractions
    Last edited by snowqu33n; 26-06-2013 at 20:02.

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    I put my 10 months old in daycare, one day a week, and after about 6 weeks pulled her out because they were calling me after a couple of hours because she'd scream the whole time, not taken any fluids, in summer, and they were concerned about

    They were willing to wear her, if she fell asleep in their arms they'd hold her for her sleeps, they were prepared to do anything they could...

    The absolute decider though was the assistant director saying she's never met a baby like mine. Ha. Eek. Which confirmed to me that it wasn't me being precious about my baby, it was that my baby does not suit the setting at all.

    I was a child carer myself so I had issues really putting her in care.

    So it's good that you've considered there's alternatives, if it really doesn't work out there's no shame in changing your mind. But it sounds like he'll be fine if he's been fine so far! Most babies will take a few weeks to settle in, but going two consecutive days will help.

    I thought sleep would be the biggest problem for katelyn in care but she would sleep for them, it was being there that was the problem.

    Good luck though! I hope I haven't spooked you! On the flip side jasper (my eldest) never even bat an eyelid at going to daycare, not even on his first day. It was a complete non-issue for him. He loved it.

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    Try and find the positives. Your little one will be learning how to be around other people, will have friends, will probably watch other kids and start to do things (walk etc) earlier. And you get a break. You can even have a coffee at work!

    My little boy started daycare about 10 months and was fine. Apart from getting sick that is...

    Best of luck!


 

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