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  1. #1
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    Default Sibling Jealousy/Rivalry and a clingy toddler

    What do I do about it?

    I have DD (4) and DS (20months). Lately, DS is clingy, whingy, and tantrummy every time I give DD any attention at all. For example, this afternoon DD and I read a book, with the intention of drawing the characters afterwards. I set DS up with his Little People, and sat on the couch with DD. DS cracked it, tried to grab the book, push DD away and climb onto my lap all at once. The kids ended up clashing heads, book ended up on the floor, I ended up frustrated with two miserable kids.

    Here are things I've tried:
    Telling him calmly and sternly "no"
    Sitting him in timeout
    Including him in the activity, even though it defeats the purpose of time just for DD

    So far, nothing works.

    He is so clingy, I am currently hiding in the bathroom to write this! How low we stoop!

    Help?

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    Last edited by risfaerie; 23-06-2013 at 17:58.

  2. #2
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    I only have one child so I'm not the most qualified person to answer. But my first thought was I'm not surprised your son is getting a bit jealous/upset as imo he is a bit too little to understand why mummy is only giving attention to his sister and not him as well? I would try to do activities that involve both children and perhaps after your DS has gone to bed have 30 mins if special one on one time with your dd?

  3. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Colbie For This Useful Post:

    beebs  (23-06-2013),risfaerie  (23-06-2013)

  4. #3
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    Yeah I do get that perhaps he doesn't understand. It is more that he must be attached to me at all times of every day that I am home. If I set up an independent activity for poor DD, he will destroy it, if we do something all together, any rime I interact with DD, he throws a tanty. It's exhausting!

    I actually go to work for a holiday these days!

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    I try and do the close/one-one play with my almost 4 year old when my 16m old is napping or truly engaged in something ( like pulling out Dvd's and opening them, lol). It's tough, my 16 m old is super slingy too.

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    risfaerie  (23-06-2013)

  7. #5
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    Could someone else mind him for a little while so you could take your DD out for one on one time? She would probably get a kick out of a special date just for the two of you.

    Sent from my telecommunications device.

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    I have ds 5 and ds 2. I haven't really had many jealousy issues yet. I utilise ds 2's nap time and when he is in bed for one on one time with ds1 though. Yet to encounter one having issues with the attention the other may be getting.

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    Quote Originally Posted by tadpoles View Post
    Could someone else mind him for a little while so you could take your DD out for one on one time? She would probably get a kick out of a special date just for the two of you.

    Sent from my telecommunications device.
    I actually did do this over the weekend, and took DD on a movie date. We really enjoyed it, it was a pleasant break for her I think! I was just saying to DH that we need to do it with her more often.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kimberleygal1 View Post
    I have ds 5 and ds 2. I haven't really had many jealousy issues yet. I utilise ds 2's nap time and when he is in bed for one on one time with ds1 though. Yet to encounter one having issues with the attention the other may be getting.
    It's really only been a recent thing. DS has been my easy going kid since birth, but now the tables have turned! I'm hoping it is "terrible twos" on his part and not a sign of things to come.

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  11. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by risfaerie View Post
    I actually did do this over the weekend, and took DD on a movie date. We really enjoyed it, it was a pleasant break for her I think! I was just saying to DH that we need to do it with her more often.

    Sent from my GT-N8010 using The Bub Hub mobile app
    That's great I can't wait to do this with my DS. Just need DS2 to be a bit older and having longer in between feeds.

    Hopefully your DS' clinginess will settle down soon so you can do more with her at home as well.

    Sent from my telecommunications device.

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    OP, I cant help, im subbing for ideas. My two are 5 and 2 and are forever fighting. The 5yo tries to copy the 2yo when the 2 yo gets attention for something.
    Last edited by IndigoJ; 23-06-2013 at 22:29.

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