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  1. #101
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    For me because it's never really come up. Jaspers pretty into rainbow as a colour scheme, so when possible he can wear that. I've never gone and bought him girls clothes specifically, though I've bought th odd pink top if it's been in sale because it didn't matter, he's got a few hand me down purple things that were girls tops. With shopping though he's never picked girls clothes so it's just not come up.

    Katelyn though wears a lot of boys clothes because she's the youngest and it's what we have. Though I'm sure if she is dressed as a boy people just assume she is a boy.

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    Hmm PP just put me in mind. I don't have a problem with girly characters on tshirts, dora or tinkerbell. DS1 wanted a dora sleep over sleeping bag so I got it. Hmmm, I think I might actually object to dresses because I don't like them myself. I never, ever wear them, I am a jeans person. Hmmm. Also my kids wear all kinds of colours, purples etc. I think it might really be about dresses!

  3. #103
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    I have 3 boys, and they have never really expressed an interest in such things, however, I'm pretty much a 'tomboy' never wear makeup or anything, very rarely dresses etc, really there just isn't anything girly in this house!

    We get hand me down clothes from friends, and a pink and grey sweatshirt turned up, which my 7yr old loves, I was a little bit interested when he first wore it to school to hear if he'd had any comments at school, and was pleased that nothing seems to have been said.

    My father has a really unconventional friend who enjoys being a clown, just being quite outrageous for the heck of it, I remember when I was about 8 - 9 this friend turned up, and all the adults went out to a party, this friend borrowed one of my mums skirts to wear to the party. All us kids were kinda "Huh!!??" but we thought it was really funny and a cool thing to do! This guy is about 6ft 5 and skinny as a rail, so he really sticks out!

    It would be amazing if all people could just have the confidence in the acceptance of others to be able to wear exactly what they wished, and when, without fear of judgement, and small mindedness.

    I'll fully support my boys with all their choices, regardless of how those choices may look to others.

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  5. #104
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    My little brother loved dressing up in my mums satin nighty when he was little... I think he loved the texture of it... He also had two big sisters & often played with barbies. He isn't gender confused.. In fact he's probably the biggest 'boys boy' out.

  6. #105
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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood View Post
    At home, anything goes and if be fine with DS wearing whatever he wanted.

    Outside the home I am happy for him to wear any colour he chooses, I don't care if boys wear pink, purple or whatever.

    ....but I'd draw the line at a dress and wouldn't let him wear one out.

    Why? Because I would hate him to get teased and I wouldn't want us to be stared at or laughed at.
    Many of you are familiar with my beautiful DS2's love for things usually perceived as "girly", and what Hollywood said is pretty much where we are at now.

    He wears whatever he likes at home, and he wears whatever colours or patterns he likes out and about, but we stick to shorts and pants... although we do accessorise!

    It comes down to other people and his capacity to deal with them. He knows when he wears hairclips and carries a pink handbag and doll there are people who look at him strangely, point and talk about him. He can deal with that, but taking that extra step and wearing a dress is just too far.

    Our conclusion was that while he's little it's our job to protect him from a cruel world, while nurturing his interests in a safe place. When he's older and more capable of making informed choices in a world he understands, then he and I will go shopping, arm in arm, in matching dresses

    ETA I suspect that some of you may be approaching this topic with a touch of idealistic fantasy. I think I would have said the same at one point. But until you actually experience a child's discomfort and distress in the face of an ignorant public, I'm not sure you can really know how it feels. That balance between letting them know they're perfect as they are while helping them survive the real world's prejudices and expectations... It's a difficult one.
    Last edited by lambjam; 22-06-2013 at 14:55.

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  8. #106
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    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    My brother used to wear dresses. From about 3-6, and he still does now, but only at home. He has always had the option to wear them out if he wishes. When he was littler he did, he stopped once he got to school age and decided for himself that he didn't want to deal with other people's looks. At home he still wears dresses, and he wears them around his friends too.

    I think mum thought it was important to let him make the decision himself, and he is a confident kid with loads of friends. My other brother wore an old wedding dress along with make up and hair clip to school for "crazy dress up day" and people didn't tease him, they actually thought he was super cool for doing it!

    So I guess it depends on a lot of factors. With those experiences in mind, if my son wants to wear a dress out in public I want to give him the chance to do that, with the warning that other people may not receive it well. If he still wants to - well we will be there to catch him if he falls.

  9. #107
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    Quote Originally Posted by rainbow road View Post
    So I guess it depends on a lot of factors. With those experiences in mind, if my son wants to wear a dress out in public I want to give him the chance to do that, with the warning that other people may not receive it well. If he still wants to - well we will be there to catch him if he falls.
    Yes... Having thought about it some more, what I failed to mention was that we did discuss all of this with DS2, and our compromise is one he chose. If he'd insisted he wanted to wear dresses out, we would have supported that, perhaps with some external professional assistance.

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  11. #108
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tamtam View Post

    I am curious though. ..I have actually never been out at the shops or anything and seen a little boy dressed as s girl. .. ever. Those of you who are okay with it. .. do you therefore buy girls clothes for them when they are a baby/toddler and they wear both??? I've never heard of anyone doing that. .. I'm not being rude I just think it's interesting that if it's so many of you day it's okay and acceptable why don't you see more of it when you're out and about?? (Or maybe people do and I can't tell!!)
    Oscar wears girls clothes all the time all those clothes I bought him the other day were all girls clothes. Today he's wearing purple coloured jeans from cotton on (girls section) a stripey purple t-shirt (girls Bonds) and the white and star jumper in the pic (girls country road)
    I'd say 50% of his clothes are girls clothes. I look in both sections because all any shop had for boys is blue with trucks. Boring.
    Here's the girls clothes I bought him the other week:

    1371883681890.jpg

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    DS had not asked to wear "girls" clothes yet ie; a dress or skirt so we will cross that bridge if we come to it!

    I personally wouldn't mind him wearing a dress in public as its just clothing to me, I've not bought any dresses as they're not to my taste and as most parents do until their children are old enough to say otherwise, I dress him in clothes I like.

    He has pink and purple clothes and they look awesome, he plays with dolls and has pink prams and a pink apron/chefs hat, colours are for everyone so IMO they're not "girls" clothes.

    Some of DFs caveman friends have commented that it's "gay" which I just find sad TBH and I feel sorry for their little boys who are told not to play with dolls or prams.

    Society is cruel, no-one bats an eyelid if a girl is out wearing jeans and a t-shirt but a little boy in a dress - ohhhh nooo!

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    FL he must be one trendy son, love the clothes!

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