So it's nearly been 2mths since we separated. I have gone from hating him, being angry, emotionless, scared, now I have hit the "what have I done" stage. I was a blubbering mess on the phone to ex the other night. I totally let my guard down. now I totally regret that I did that. it would be a long road for us to fix what has happened. I thought it could be fixed, but last night when he was here, long story, I just didn't feel anything for him. no I love you, no need for hugs, no anything. I guess the reason I was upset on the phone was because I hate seeing my kids upset. its not their fault and it hurts bad to see them that way. so I thought trying to fix it would be the right thing for them. but its not the right thing for me or my eldest ds. how long does it take to stop grieving what you had and can just move on? I don't want another relationship at the moment so that's not what I mean by moving on. I just mean I need to get out of this hole. im seeing my counsellor again tomorrow.