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  1. #1
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    Default Swim lessons

    Ds1 is 3.5.
    He hates swim lessons. He hates the teacher (he's a great teacher, just tough) and because ds is very very skinny he feels the cold a bit more- it's a heated pool but ds is in the 3rd centile for weight, so he gets colder quicker.

    Its a family run business that's been there 30 years, so I know they're good. It's just that the teacher doesn't cuddle and hug and that's what ds wants.

    I don't think theres much chance of changing teachers as the guy we have is the owner and he rakes all the preschoolers.

    I don't want him to quit coz I don't want him to think he can quit anything in life, but the crying in class on Friday is almost unbearable.

    Wwyd?

  2. #2
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    Assuming he has given it a try for a reasonable length of time I would swap to another centre. Swimming is such an important skill to learn that I wouldn't want him to drop it altogether, but forcing him to go every week in tears isn't something I would continue.

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    How many lessons have you had? Assuming at least a handful with no improvement then I would give it a break for a bit and go back there once the weather starts to warm up.

    I have been thinking about putting DS in swimming lessons but honestly the idea of swimming at this time of year is just not at all appealing to me (regardless of how well the pool is heated!)

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    I would either wait until Summer and try again, or change centres/teachers. Has he told you why he doesn't like it? My DD hated swimming lessons when she was 2.5 and she said it was because she didn't like the teacher, but for no reason. We changed her and she lived it immediately. Even now at nearly 4, if her teacher is away and she doesn't like the replacement, she doesn't enjoy herself as much.

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    He's been doing it for a year.
    Irhink he doesn't like it now because he won't listen.. Eg.. Hold the kickboard at the bottom of the board, not on the sides, but ds wants to hold it how he wants to hold it, and so ds gets the sh1ts that he can't do it the way he wants to.

    Now with jumping in the water, ds wants to 'pin drop' in the water, but he is meant to bend over and kind of start to learn the stance of a dive (they don't expect him to dive, just bend over)..

    I agree it's really important to me that he learns how to swim..the thing is, he loooooves the water, he just doesn't want to listen..

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    My 3.5 yr old DD has been doing swimming lessons since she was one and it's taken a few teacher changes to get one who she has clicked with. A teacher who is persistent, but patient, fun but also firm. We've also changed her to a 15min private lesson rather than a group one. We found she was way too distracted with other kids there.
    If I was you I'd try a different teacher or give him a little break over winter.

  7. #7
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    I would make him stick it out. I would assume he would be starting school in 18 months or so where he will get teachers he won't like (who won't cuddle him) and he needs to learn to follow directions or instruction. I know that sounds harsh but I think it's our job as parents to teach them they won't always like people in authority but they have to respect and listen to them. Obviously if the teacher was bullying him or having unreasonable expectations I would say move him but if it's little things like hold the board differently then no

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    I would be inclined to change swim schools just to trial another swim teacher. He may need a teacher that enjoys cuddles or doesn't mind him not using proper technique at a young age.
    I know my 3 year old has never swam well with all her other swim teachers as they just didn't 'get' who she was but she's been going to the same teacher for the last 5 months and swimming like a little fish now and even listens which is huge for her (she has SPD).

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    Quote Originally Posted by Meags82 View Post
    I would make him stick it out. I would assume he would be starting school in 18 months or so where he will get teachers he won't like (who won't cuddle him) and he needs to learn to follow directions or instruction. I know that sounds harsh but I think it's our job as parents to teach them they won't always like people in authority but they have to respect and listen to them. Obviously if the teacher was bullying him or having unreasonable expectations I would say move him but if it's little things like hold the board differently then no
    At age 3 they still have a lot of growing to do and most don't really learn to follow instructions until after 4. 18months to school is still a long way away so I'd take comfort in my child getting the needs he wants which if it's cuddles so be it!
    A child crying the whole way through a swimming lesson isn't going to get him anywhere and can be distressing not only for himself but his mum too.

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  11. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Meags82 View Post
    I would make him stick it out. I would assume he would be starting school in 18 months or so where he will get teachers he won't like (who won't cuddle him) and he needs to learn to follow directions or instruction. I know that sounds harsh but I think it's our job as parents to teach them they won't always like people in authority but they have to respect and listen to them. Obviously if the teacher was bullying him or having unreasonable expectations I would say move him but if it's little things like hold the board differently then no
    Aaaargh see I agree with this, but it's really tough to watch him cry. And I don't want him to be scarred from it.

    Once he's in the water he's fine, it's just when waiting for his turn he bawls his eyes out.

    I might see if he can swap to the lady teacher for just a few weeks, and if he's still upset I'll pull him out. We r moving to Perth in 6 months anyway so we'll have to stop sometime anyway.


 

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