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  1. #21
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    To be honest 13 year olds are too young to be given facebook accounts, email accounts, uncontrolled access to the internet, smart phones etc without some form of parental supervision and control. It sounds a bit Big Brotherish, but I would prefer to be a bit Orwellian and ensure my kids aren’t exposed to some of the crap going around. There are kids under 16 that are texting round explicit pictures and video of kids a similar age and have been charged with distributing child pornography. This activity and things like sexting is fairly common place. These are normal, everyday 13, 14 year olds that are being charged and convicted of child pornography. So things like mobile phones, social networking sites etc really do need some parental control.

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by second baby not so easy View Post
    Hi, my oldest is 7 so a bit off for me, but I was under impression to be on fb you have to be over 16years of age? That is what I am hoping to use on my kids

    At first I was thinking with your post - close it down dont let him use it. But as he is already on this, this has given you an insight to what people he is socialising with and I think this is beneficial - like having inside info

    Yeah they are young and probably dont really comprehend about rape, race, swearing and obvisouly dont have parents to monitor there usuage (as they probably think there child would never speak like that) but I would not condone this behaviour - defiantly use this as a discussion with your son. We cant change the way others speak or act (even in adulthood) but helping your son deal with this is your best bet I think. Or you can block certain peoples post on your son's feed so he hasnt defriended them, he just doesnt see this vulgar stuff on his feed.
    Just thought I'd clarify that these comments are not on his feed, I have in fact been a snoop, and clicked on his friends actual facebook pages to have a look. So, none of this language has actually been viewed on his page. Many of them are fine too, just silly immature stuff, but the things that I mentioned did worry me - he's not so stupid that he would allow something inappropriate to be viewed on his page as he knows the consequences would be no more facebook.

    It is also definitely 13 years of age that they are legally allowed to have a facebook profile. I checked before we let him have it.

  3. #23
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    Maybe you should make it a condition where you are friends with him and you have full access to his account. You should also maybe sit down with him and explain what can happen with information that goes online, what it can mean for him down the track. It used to be you could say whatever you wanted, because it wasn't online, but now with future employers (and he might want a job in a year or two), facebook statuses might be the difference between him and another kid. Teach him that everything he puts online can and will have a lasting effect.

  4. #24
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    I believe you've done the right thing by allowing him to have an account which you can view. If you had said he couldn't have an account (or tried to take it off him now) you can guarantee he would have one anyway, except you wouldn't know about it and wouldn't be ale to monitor it. Better the devil you know...

    I think, as some pp have said, you need to keep an active eye on his account and mention anything inappropriate to him to gauge his response to it. There are lots of settings in FB which could be useful, for example if you see bad stuff coming up in his news feed from a particular person you can set it so that person is hidden from his news feed (but he doesn't have to suffer the embarrassment of 'unfriending' them cos his uncool mum made him).

    Good luck!

  5. #25
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    and all that the Lorax left here in this mess was a small pile of rocks with the one word...UNLESS
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    I get worried about what's going to happen when my children get to the point of me agreeing to fb accounts. (My son's already asking for an apple id, and does chats on his Ipod when playing clash of clans etc). I monitor it, keep it visual, but hate that once we've hooked it to the internet once, it automatically joins our wifi, unless I ask it to ignore it. This is where once, monitoring our children on the internet was easy as. Keep one computer in the house in clear vision. Not that clear cut anymore now wifi exists. Ipods, Ipads, phones, pc's etc, and I've been told that I have to provice an Ipad for my son for school next year - he'll be 9.

    As for facebook, I worry that while we can certainly say "we want to have full access as friends", but they can block whatever, and you wouldn't know. Then there are the parents who say "we want you password, so we can log on at anytime to check it", then the teen opens up a second account.

    For people who say it's normal and the kids think they're cool when they post that sort of stuff on fb - sure, they're probably right, but the only reason it's "normal" for teens to say stuff which we'd deem offensive (like making fun of rape or using the n word or whatever) is probably because people are saying "it's normal behaviour" rather than using it as examples of behaviour we need to get a message about that it's not acceptable.

    Geez I hate normalisation of stuff that can offend others, and should stay in the "not acceptable" box.

  6. #26
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    I havent read through all of these but my 12 and 11 yr old sister and 9yo brother all have fb which i monitor (as their parents dont) and i found msgs on my sisters from some 30 year old man saying how he had looked through her pics and "the mere sight of her made him want to cum". Also an old man was talking alot to my 9yr old bro quite inappropriately... For this reason i wont allow my 13 yr olds any social media, i would rather give them a phone for texting their mates. I urge you to check pms as well as that is where the danger lies....

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using The Bub Hub mobile app

  7. #27
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    Oh also just check to.make sure all the settings are VERY private. This needs to be done regularly as fb changes. You can set it so 'only friends' can chat to them and noone can just type their name in and connect. That would help of you didnt want to be checking pms

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using The Bub Hub mobile app


 

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