Hello ladies! I apologize in advance for the wordy post, but I need to vent to someone who understands what I'm going through, which I'm sure someone here might
I am a first time mum to a 5 1/2 month old boy. I have been kind of doing my own variation on attachment parenting. I respond to my baby quickly when he is upset, I breastfeed on demand, and recently I have started cuddling him to sleep as his sleep patterns have been changing and he seems to be having trouble falling asleep on his own like he used to. He has always slept in a bassinet next to our bed, and occasionally we do bedshare. I have no issues with doing any of these things, and in fact I really enjoy doing them, and I really do notice that we have a strong bond and he trusts me a great deal. My husband is also very active in caring for him despite working full-time (I am still at home with bubba during the day, btw).
The issue that I am having is with mainly my mother and MIL. I am American and moved to Melbourne to live with my DH, and I've been here over 3 years now. My parents are still in the US. From the time Noah was born, my mom would make comments to me on Skype that I was holding Noah too much, not letting him cry long enough before picking him up, etc. I brushed it off because I felt comfortable in what I was doing and was confident that I couldn't spoil him. My MIL would make similar comments at first, but I didn't mind that either to begin with.
About a month ago, Noah started getting upset when we would go to the in-laws house and either my MIL or SIL would hold him. At first I thought maybe he just is getting tired or hungry, but he does it every time we go over there (at least once a week). As soon as he comes back to me, he is fine. So now that he's been doing that, MIL has been making more and more comments about "he needs to realize that he doesn't need you to be right there all the time" and things along those lines. Will he become more comfortable with other people the more we are around them? Part of me is just worried that he will never feel comfortable with other people, which I'm sure is not true. So I guess I'm just looking for reassurance here or for experiences that some of you can share?
Sorry to keep typing, but on top of that, my mom is putting the pressure on me to put Noah in his own room at night, just because my brother and sister and I were all in our own rooms from the time we got home from the hospital. She thinks that we would all sleep better if we did move him out, and I keep telling her that we all sleep fine. Noah's not bothered by my husband's super loud snoring, and we have never been bothered by his baby noises.
It just frustrates me because when I was pregnant, the biggest piece of advice that I got from people was to listen to my instincts. Well I'm doing that, and now people are telling me not to! Thanks in advance for your replies, I just really need some encouragement right now