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  1. #51
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    its such a shame that there isn't the support out there for FF like there is for BF...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Louise41 View Post
    its such a shame that there isn't the support out there for FF like there is for BF...
    I FF my first and have mixed fad and now still BF my second. I hate the thought of people feeling guilty when they wanted to bf. Can I ask what kind of support you want for FFing? In my experience FF was really pushed a number of times both in hosp and by ECHNs and I've seen a number of online resources. Do you mean like an equivalent to the ABA?

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    I bf my ds for a while and it is pretty hard when you first start off! I was in agony for weeks because of latching problems and considered ff myself but decided not too. But it really did get on my nerves when the nurses came for home visits and i mentioned formula and all they could say was no keep bf. Breast is best. Now i understand where they are coming from but why do they have to try and force you to keep breast feeding even if you are having problems with it and want to ff? I say if the mother and the baby are happy and doing well with formula then thats all that matters really and no mother should feel guilty for not bf or being able too.. Its not for everyone.

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  6. #54
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    I felt enormous guilt (i switched to formula at 3 months) beacuse i knew i wasnt giving my dd the best i could. I felt like i had let her down

    This time round if i have major bf problems again, ill switch guilt free knowing i tried my best and bubs will thrive either way

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    Quote Originally Posted by Atropos View Post
    I FF my first and have mixed fad and now still BF my second. I hate the thought of people feeling guilty when they wanted to bf. Can I ask what kind of support you want for FFing? In my experience FF was really pushed a number of times both in hosp and by ECHNs and I've seen a number of online resources. Do you mean like an equivalent to the ABA?
    you are very lucky then if you had support with FF. 18 years ago I was made to feel like the worst mother and I had no support with choosing formula , teats etc.. BUT the ABA was everywhere and I was inundated with info on BF but I was literally given a video and told to teach myself how to make a bottle of formula.... very much one sided 18 years ago perhaps times have changed and society is more willing to help .. I have no idea.. all I can do is say what I experienced all those years ago and I will never forget how the MCHNs made me feel being a FFing mother

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    Sometimes I feel guilty cause I feel I put myself before DD. I discussed it with DF as I'm sure with perseverance I could have established a bf relationship with DD and we both knew the health benefits to bfing and as she's his DD also I felt I should discuss it with him. I know it was for the best for both DD, DF and I and I don't feel guilty for giving her formula but because I, in the end, chose to put myself first and occasionally it makes me feel selfish. But ultimately my mental health was and is far more important.

    So that's where my guilt comes from. Not ff itself but the reason she's ff.

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  10. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by Louise41 View Post
    you are very lucky then if you had support with FF. 18 years ago I was made to feel like the worst mother and I had no support with choosing formula , teats etc.. BUT the ABA was everywhere and I was inundated with info on BF but I was literally given a video and told to teach myself how to make a bottle of formula.... very much one sided 18 years ago perhaps times have changed and society is more willing to help .. I have no idea.. all I can do is say what I experienced all those years ago and I will never forget how the MCHNs made me feel being a FFing mother
    Not to be rude but other than how to make a bottle, what else do you need? Support wise, I mean? In Australia most babies are formula fed at some point- it's often seen as the norm.
    Like, what would a bottle feeding association actually do? You pick a formula and off you go. Generally, there's no physical issues to overcome, no supply probs etc.
    With my first I was being pushed to bf when I couldn't, ten years later and it was like everyone was telling me to just give up and ff.
    I think both are fine choices. I have obviously no prob with bottle feeding I'm just trying to understand what support is lacking if that makes sense?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Atropos View Post
    Not to be rude but other than how to make a bottle, what else do you need? Support wise, I mean? In Australia most babies are formula fed at some point- it's often seen as the norm.
    Like, what would a bottle feeding association actually do? You pick a formula and off you go. Generally, there's no physical issues to overcome, no supply probs etc.
    With my first I was being pushed to bf when I couldn't, ten years later and it was like everyone was telling me to just give up and ff.
    I think both are fine choices. I have obviously no prob with bottle feeding I'm just trying to understand what support is lacking if that makes sense?
    and my reply to this... u pick a boob and put your kid on it.. simple... You have no idea how hard it was to know what formula was suitable for my baby, or what teat flow ... or even if he didn't drink it all was he getting enough etc.. it would have been so nice to have some sort of support but hey if I was BF I could have had so much support because BF mums are made to feel superior to FF mums who are just left to fend for themselves because FF is deemed as easy- well its not- I cant tell you how many days/hours I spent in tears because my FF baby wasn't thriving and was constipated on a certain FF, teat flow was too slow or too fast but I had to do it all on my own..... but yet when my then SIL was bf and struggled she has so much support and a 24/7 ph number to call...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Louise41 View Post
    and my reply to this... u pick a boob and put your kid on it.. simple...
    Are you f#!*ing kidding me?! How dare you!
    I'm currently spending 1/6 of my day with my breasts attached to a pump, other parts trying to teach a tiny baby how to correctly latch and keep sucking for long enough, washing and sterilising pump parts, labelling and filling milk bags, making sure I drink enough water and eat enough food even though it's the last thing I feel like doing, stressing every time I sleep through an express alarm because I desperately need to keep my supply there and having to make dd1 wait because it's near impossible to do something else when you have a pump attached to each breast. I, sure as hell, never had to work that hard when I switched dd1 to formula.

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  15. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by Louise41 View Post
    and my reply to this... u pick a boob and put your kid on it.. simple... You have no idea how hard it was to know what formula was suitable for my baby, or what teat flow ... or even if he didn't drink it all was he getting enough etc.. it would have been so nice to have some sort of support but hey if I was BF I could have had so much support because BF mums are made to feel superior to FF mums who are just left to fend for themselves because FF is deemed as easy- well its not- I cant tell you how many days/hours I spent in tears because my FF baby wasn't thriving and was constipated on a certain FF, teat flow was too slow or too fast but I had to do it all on my own..... but yet when my then SIL was bf and struggled she has so much support and a 24/7 ph number to call...
    Ah ok. 11 years ago with DD1 we bought the formula the hospital recommended. Teats- you just read the packet- newborn tears stage one, infant 6 months + stage two. Anti colic teats for bubs with colic. Certainly there is more choice these days but they are all clearly labelled. But have definitely changed since DD1 was small.
    There is a helpline that parents can call for help with any child issues including bottle feeding- http://www.parentline.com.au/getting...e-services.php
    It's free (unlike the ABA) and 7 days a week. There are also phone lines provided by the formula companies too.
    I guess the thing I noticed most was that my GPs were quite knowledgable about ff and had no clue about bf. so while it's true that bf mums can pay to join the ABA, ff mums can still access community support and other helplines now.
    It's funny that you say bf mums are made to feel superior- I think it depends on your circle and experiences. There have been several high profile instances of bf discrimination and many women still feel uncomfortable bf in public- I wish no one felt this way- bf or ff!
    A mum I know was recently told her reasons for not bf were "rubbish" by a stranger!! Disgusting!

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