I was warned when I had my c section that my milk would take longer to come in than normal.
On the topic of ff guilt I think hospitals aren't helping mothers feel better about choosing to ff. My mil is a midwife at a 'breast feeding friendly' hospital. Their policies are so strict they cannot suggest formula to a mother that just needs a break from having her nipples chewed off. They can give it to the mother if she requests but I know that having to do that made me feel like I was a terrible mum.
In my experience not many people choose to ff right off the bat. First baby I intended to bf and managed to for 12 months. Second baby, fed ok at first. Kept losing weight. Had to supplement a bit. Then at 6 weeks he simply refused the breast and never went back. I expressed until he was 3 month s and was getting very little milk by then. He is happy and healthy and I was spending 2 hours a day to get 35ml or less.
You can only do what you can do. Each baby is different.
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I feel incredibly guilty over not Breastfeeding. And I deserve all the guilt, regret and criticism of get. I planned to breast feed t whole way through my pregnancy. Never bought bottles or formula just in case. Half way through my pregnancy I stopped taking my anti depressants. And (this is my horrible shameful secret) started to feel more unattached to the baby growing inside me. After my emergency c section as I came out from the general and met my baby girl for the first time I didn't cope I broke down and ask them to take her away. I felt unattached from her, DF, my family and myself. I never gave it a shot. The midwives ended up giving her formula while DF had to go buy everything needed for FF.
I was released from hospital and still felt no attachment to anyone and ended up in mental health care when DD was 2 weeks old. I neve gave her a shot at a brilliant healthy beginning. I was so selfish and uncaring.
Since then I've ha alot of help and support and am on a new anti depressant. But I feel sick to my stomach that I never even gave it a chance even though I always planned to. She missed out on having the brilliant start to life that is breast milk and we both missed out on the bonding. I feel ashamed and guilty every day about it.
People always say that it's ok because she is a happy healthy little girl. It doesn't make me feel better though because she could have been so much better off if it wasn't for me. I don't know if it would have worked out or not but bits of fact I didn't try that makes me feel horrible. Sorry for raving on. Having a little sob now. Guess I needed to vent about it.
Breast feeding is NOT much better than formula! Please don't believe the hype about IQ points and better health. In our country, with our clean water and sterilization formula is an excellent source of nutrition. The mainstream media over-exaggerates the benefits of BF.
Some reading that might help:
You're doing a fantastic job being a mum. Try not to look back at things you can't change. Move forward and be the strong, loving mum you know you can be. Your baby doesn't care what milk she's drinking - she just wants her mama.
You can't look around a classroom of kids and pick which ones were BF'd or FF'd. It simply doesn't matter!
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