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  1. #111
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    Quote Originally Posted by babyla View Post
    The hospital I was at made me leave hospital without any formula - I asked for a small amount to go home (they had put DS on formula after about 3 days). Nope. I had to go with DH post cs to a frigging shopping centre to buy formula and bottles hoping that DS didn't get hungry before we were home and ready. We were naive pre his birth and had assumed I would be able to breast feed. After 7 days in hospital with complications, it was not going to happen. A close family friend met us at home with me sterilising bottles in a sauce pan of boiling water. She had her DH leave and buy me a steriliser that second. Clearly my experience was one not of support nor education. There were no "what if bf doesn't work out classes" so I feel I was unsupported, uneducated and until a ff friend visited very, very unprepared.
    oh same here, thank goodness for a dear ff friend who came to my rescue. She leant me her steriliser, bottle warmer etc gave me heaps of advice on ff and bf. had me go get blessed thistle (I was like what??? Can you spell? that had no clue what the hell she was talking about) recommended an awesome LC she used (who thank god showed us how to prepare/store formula and bottle feed correctly - not just shove it in baby mouth). basically I got a hell of a lot more advice from my friend than any mchn I saw. And I saw plenty, was at a drop in bf clinic every second day for help.

    And no, in my experience once you mention you are ff, mchn will not offer advice as it goes against their agreement of promoting/supporting bf. I was told by many, we don't know anything about formula.

    I agree with pp, needs to be more advice when bf doesn't go to plan, I thought everyone could bf, didnt know bout countless problems that can happen. We need to be educated more.

  2. #112
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    Quote Originally Posted by anewme View Post
    Funny how experience of that time 19 years for me were the exact opposite. I was made to learn how to use formula before I left hospital. I had to buy a yin and show them I had it incase I couldn't feed in the middle of the night. I was made to feel dirty for breastfeeding. At every opportunity the much and go tried to get me to swap to ffs as it was so much easier (their words not mine).

    Now I breastfeed off and on for nearly 20 years. The support for breastfeeding is so much better now. So is the support for bottle feeding. The 2 closest women to me have ff 6 kids.


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    lucky you which hospital were you in? I delivered at a private hospital in Brisbane and I can assure you my experience wasn't like yours

  3. #113
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    I think tangible support for bfing is severely lacking, thus so many of us that wanted to bf but couldn't. But there is no doubt society is much kinder and supportive of mums that bf. And tangible support for formula is so lacking from health care providers bc as I said, it's seen as encouraging formula. So it's very much a case of - you want to ff? well we don't support the practice of formula feeding so work it out yourself, you are on your own.

    It can be a lonely experience using formula sometimes.

  4. #114
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    Quote Originally Posted by anewme View Post
    Funny how experience of that time 19 years for me were the exact opposite. I was made to learn how to use formula before I left hospital. I had to buy a yin and show them I had it incase I couldn't feed in the middle of the night. I was made to feel dirty for breastfeeding. At every opportunity the much and go tried to get me to swap to ffs as it was so much easier (their words not mine).

    Now I breastfeed off and on for nearly 20 years. The support for breastfeeding is so much better now. So is the support for bottle feeding. The 2 closest women to me have ff 6 kids.


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    My DD1 was born in 1993 and I decided to FF from about day 3. I also wasn't judged or BFing pushed on me by the midwives, they just made the first bottle up for me and then I was shown how to do it myself.

    The Bfing stance has been pushed a lot harder since then, not always for the better

  5. #115
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    I think tangible support for bfing is severely lacking, thus so many of us that wanted to bf but couldn't. But there is no doubt society is much kinder and supportive of mums that bf. And tangible support for formula is so lacking from health care providers bc as I said, it's seen as encouraging formula. So it's very much a case of - you want to ff? well we don't support the practice of formula feeding so work it out yourself, you are on your own.

    It can be a lonely experience using formula sometimes.
    I agree. I find it astounding that with so many resources available today then ever before, more drs, mws, hospitals educated than ever before, then WHY are bf rates not rising? There is something lacking and that is tangible support. The best resources mean nothing without support.

    It seems too many mums are dumped in the "too hard basket", lots of professionals want you to bf but don't know how to help you succeed. And if they don't know how, then how the hell is a first time mum meant to know. It really does astound me.

  6. #116
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    Quote Originally Posted by Louise41 View Post
    lucky you which hospital were you in? I delivered at a private hospital in Brisbane and I can assure you my experience wasn't like yours
    Lucky???
    I was made to feel dirty and I was belittled by being told I would give up in the middle of the night so I Made to get formula before they released me.

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    Last edited by LoveLivesHere; 01-01-2014 at 15:28.

  7. #117
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    I give up goodbye

  8. #118
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    I was unable to BF my DD as I had literally no milk. Not a drop! I sat in breastpumps for hours watching air come out. We were shown in the hospital how to prepare formula, sterilise etc and the midwife gave us a list of what to buy. Some midwives were helpful, some I felt were judgemental. I think a lot of my feelings of guilt about not BFing come ffrom the constant reminders, it seems like anywhere you look there is the message 'breast feeding for the first 6 months is best'. I feel like this message is everywhere and is verging on being rammed down people's throats. Even the formula tin tells you! I very much wanted to BF my DD. I feel sad when I see other breastfeeding mums. I hate that other people can feed her, it's not 'special' between me and her if that makes sense. I blame myself for her silent reflux and allergies. The last thing I feel like hearing is another 'you must breast feed' message! I know most of this is a projection of my own sadness about not being able to BF but the constant messages don't help.

  9. #119
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    I thought I would share my story.

    My DS was born via emergency c section and I was up to try BF. I couldn't get the hang of it and I tried everything the nurses showed me, whilst helping him to latch, and the different positions to hold bub whilst breast feeding. He just wouldn't latch on, and when he did he wasn't getting enough. After persistence for 3 days, frustration, sore nipples, crying, baby blues, I just kept trying, because I was hammered with breast is best and when he would latch on when the nurse was there and not latch on when I tried myself, I got so upset and felt guilty. I just kept trying and trying and then I went home after 3 days and kept trying, at this stage he would latch, but I THOUGHT he was getting enough milk and he kept crying and crying. My nipples were so cracked and sore. I felt like a failure. I persevered for 2 weeks, he was miserable. Mum bought me a pump and I pumped and got such little milk, I wasn't producing much. I put it down to I wasn't making enough milk. Finally DP purchased formula. I was over trying to BF. I gave him a bottle and he slept 4 hours straight and I could tell he was settled and full. Then I had a home nurse visit and she saw the formula tin on the bench and said to me "what is that? You put those bottles and formula away RIGHT NOW! and go back to BF". I felt so upset, as I was trying as a new mother to do what was right for my son and FF worked for me. Hence, I didn't listen and continued to FF and never looked back. I did feel guilty as I heard the breast is best from the midwives, doctor, home nurses. I swear I could of walked out of the hospital with 1,000 ways to BF.
    I support each mother's decision as to what works for them and their child. Every one has their own story.

    I will try again BF with my next child due Feb, but if the same persists, I won't hesitate to FF. I'll be equally happy if BF works out for me next time 😊


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  11. #120
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    Quote Originally Posted by Atropos View Post
    I FF my first and have mixed fad and now still BF my second. I hate the thought of people feeling guilty when they wanted to bf. Can I ask what kind of support you want for FFing? In my experience FF was really pushed a number of times both in hosp and by ECHNs and I've seen a number of online resources. Do you mean like an equivalent to the ABA?
    The only time I found FF pushed onto me was when DS was in special care with an infection. Even then it was not pushed it was explained as the best way to keep his persistent high temps down. With DD, the fact that I ended up FF was the main reason I stopped attending clinic, I simply could not cope with the horrible nurse there constantly making loud mention of my lack of BF. She actually told me that I could not participate in certain parts of conversation due to my FF DD.

    With DS I did not even visit a clinic, I was so afraid of the same treatment. I actually skipped the home visit too. I weighed him myself at the chemist. I am really lucky, I have supportive family and friends who love me no matter what I choose with my kids.

    Don't get me wrong, this time I will try again, I have seen way too many situations (including your own) where BF is a success after previous inability to do so. I personally did way better second time round than I did first time. I plan to do better again this time.

    I don't think there needs to be separate support for parents who FF- I would like to see the support (ie clinic nurses) that are supposed to be there for all mothers do their jobs and BE THERE for all mothers. Regardless of whether they FF, BF, or any other choice that they make.

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