We are 90% sure we our family is complete with one gorgeous DS, just turned 2, born after several IVF attempts. I've mainly felt lucky and blessed to have just the one, and TBH I was struggling to cope in his first year as he was a pretty challenging bub. But as he gets older and mothers gp friends etc are moving on to #2, I do wonder. If I list all the aspects, the positives of being a 3-person family seem to far outweigh the negatives. Financially (we can barely afford a 2-brm flat in Sydney), attention to DS (he is the sort of child that needs a LOT!)/ coping with 2 young kids (I think I would really struggle and it would put a lot of strain on our relationship), socially, career-wise (Im just starting to re-engage with work and thinking about retraining as an option), environmental concerns etc.
I think if Dh and I were 10 years younger we would consider having another much more seriously, but I'm 41 (and have a lot of signs of perimenopause, which is to be expected given my ovarian reserve was cr&p at age 37-38) he is 46 ... We do have a frostie, but after that it would have to be fresh IVF cycles, and my response was pretty bad at age 38...The thought of undergoing IVF again makes me feel nauseous...I never want to be in that emotional place again - it completely took over my life and I was in a very negative headspace.
So why do I still feel some guilt? It may be partly family expectations, or wider society, or just my body's hormones saying that time is running out.
Anyway, sorry I know i am rambling here, but just wanting to connect w others in a similar position. And seeking positive stories of sole-child families...