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  1. #241
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    Quote Originally Posted by Minib View Post
    I'm not sure if this is an active thread. We just had a mmc. Found out at the 12 week scan that our baby didn't make it. I wasn't bleeding or anything so the news was a huge shock to us. We are devastated. We waited for 18 months for this baby. Even attempted IVF twice. So we were so excited with the pregnancy. A short 8 week of happiness.

    I'm having a d&c tomorrow morning. It's the best thing to do for us but now I'm so upset at the though of in 26 hours I won't have my baby inside me.

    I know for a lot of people, it's not a baby yet. And miscarriages are also very common. It happens to my friends too. But nothing like when you have to go through it yourself. The pain is indescribable. I hope our little angel knows s/he was well loved. Very much loved and can go to baby heaven in peace. This hurts!
    So sorry MiniB. Such a hard time for you. Hugs.

  2. #242
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    @Minib I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my angel at 8 weeks a few days before christmas and I had a D&C 2 months ago.
    I hope you have a councillor or speak with Pregnancy Loss Australia- it helps to talk. They were a big help and sent me a teddy bear in memory of another's lost baby.

    As hard as it is now, take each day as it comes. I promise each day does get a little easier. Your angel was just to precious for this earth

    Big big hugs to you xx

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    maturemum1501  (20-02-2014)

  4. #243
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    Thanks ladies. I'm so sad that we all went through it. It's so unfair. All our little angels will look after us and bless us with babies. It is beyond devastating. But I know all of you are right, it will get better as time pass.

    JTM, I remember you. So sorry to see you here. I hope we can be in the due thread soon.

  5. #244
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    Hey everyone,

    I just recently joined the forum and trying to get involved.

    We just lost our bub at 4w3d. I don’t even feel like I’m allowed to be upset because we had only just found out a few days earlier and also because we weren’t very far along – but I am.
    I have been so needy as well. DP works from 8am to 6pm and by about 3pm I’m a sobbing mess. But to make matters worse the poor man gets home from work and by that stage I’m just plain moody and horrible to be around. I can’t seem to really want to be around anyone except him but when he gets home I’m like this??? What is that all about???
    Our doctor told us best to wait a couple of months but like always we’re impatient and so have started trying straight away. When I say trying I don’t mean actively temping or charting but we’re just not preventing. I’m absolutely petrified of our next pregnancy….. (See I really am a crazy woman!) But the thought of losing another bub breaks my heart… How do you actually make it through a pregnancy without the constant fear and worry that something is going to go wrong??

    I’m really sorry to hear of everyone elses pain and loss as well….I describe it as becoming part of an exclusive club you never want to be a part of. But I do believe only those that have experienced it properly know what it’s like.


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  7. #245
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    Ladies, sorry we have to welcome you to this thread. I hope that by sharing your stories with others who truly understand, it will help lift some of the pain

    Minib - we've now been through 2 mmc, the first we found out at our 12wk scan just as you did. It is definitely not what you expect, especially after seeing a healthy baby (we saw a strong hb at 6.5/7ish wks) to have gone thrpugh exactly the same in November was a sick and twisted mind game

    Bubbywatts - you are most certainly allowed to be hurt, angry, moody, whatever emotion you feel. It is a grieving process that you must work through and feeling all those emotions is part of the healing process. as for your next pregnancy, well I was an absolute nervous wreck with dd until she was squealing in my arms. I am 5.5wks preg again after our 2nd mmc in Nov and just dreading beyond belief every single scan and hoping each day that we complete our family this time. Its a matter of just getting through one day at a time and trying (not that easy) to not dwell on the what ifs

    Your days will slowly become easier to get through, it just takes time.

    Apologies to other newbies, I'm pretty sporadic in my postings but I have read your stories and know exactly how you are all feeling. Big hugs everyone xx

    Sent from my HTC Desire X using The Bub Hub mobile app

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  9. #246
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    Hi ladies, firstly just sending bigs hugs, love and strength to you all. I'm so sorry that you're going through this.

    I've been feeling a little better in myself this past week. Hoping that perhaps my hormones have settled down a bit now, seeing as my cycles have been all over the place since the mc. I thought of our baby often, thought about how far I would be now, but surprised myself in that I didn't have a huge breakdown as well. Now I'm just terrified that if we do fall again, that we'll lose that baby too

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    Wishnhope  (19-02-2014)

  11. #247
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    A sad welcome to all of the locally ladies joining us on this thread..
    It is perfectly " normal" to feel whatever you feel. Each of us handles grief in different ways, and each of us has a different kind of support network.
    Each day will come and go but the reality of losing a loved one will stay in your heart forever..
    Each day will provide it's challenges at first.. The phone call from a friend, an appointment letter from the doctors, or the pregnant woman in the lift.. But each day will make you stronger.
    I think that we will all agree that a growing being inside you is a LIFE.. And no matter how far we came, loss is loss..
    And we must allow ourselves time and opportunity to grieve our loss..
    We tried for 10 yrs to conceive, and found IVF to be out of our financial reach.. We fell naturally in July, got to see heartbeat at 6+1 and saw bub at 12+3 lovely face, hands and feet.. But sadly no heartbeat..
    We were/ are devastated and are now facing our future not knowing wether it will be with or without children.
    DH cannot bare going through that again, and doesnt want to see me hurt like that again either.
    I can't make him.. And if we decide not to, tgen i think that i can be ok with that..
    We are now looking ahead one day at a time, and I guess will come to a decision in our time, when it's right for us.

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    sirine  (02-03-2014)

  13. #248
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    Bubbywatts, you are allowed to grieve regardless of how far into pregnancy you were. A baby is still a baby. The hopes and dreams we had as a family are taken away from us. It's beyond devastating.

    Michellek, congrats on being pregnant. I can imagine how worried it is to be pregnant again. We also had a strong heartbeat at 7 week scan. We are shattered. It is so cruel. I can't believe how something natural can be so unnatural.

    Twinniemumma, I'm sorry you had to to through it too. The thought of trying for another baby give me hope but also fear. Fear of losing again.

    Ladies, I had my curette yesterday. Doctor said all went well. He said I don't need a scan to check as he's very sure everything is good and clean now. What's your thought ladies? Is a scan a must after a curette?

  14. #249
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    Minib, a scan is your choice, and should be covered under public health. However if there were no complications, and you heal well, they would say not required.
    For peace of mind though.. Your choice.
    We had other issues with our loss .. ( fibrous lumps in uterous ) so we wanted to be sure. I also bled much linger than the norm.
    For us it was peace of mind that all was ok..

  15. #250
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    Thanks maturemum. I'll ask my GP and specialist if they can refer me for a scan.

    Sorry another question ladies. I have also developed a fever and a slight sore throat. My body is achy like I'm coming down with a cold. That's how I know normally. I checked my temperature last night. Wasn't too bad. I'm just worried if this is the start of infection or just my body is really run down after a tough week. Any advise? Thanks


 

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